I’m early 40s, probably perimenopausal. Had no difficulties with (great) orgasms in my teens and twenties, started a slow slide probably from my mid 30s and around 37 I’d say my sex drive really started to go through the floor. I found it a huge, huge loss of something that had previously brought me a lot of psychological happiness and release, and really grieved it, but as it’s been several years now I suppose I’ve sort of started to get used to it. I find it really hard to orgasm now and even when I do it’s a totally fizzling little blip, more depressing than not having one. I could sort of live with that, what I find massively frustrating is that I still sometimes get the feeling of wanting to come, and remembering what a great orgasm used to feel like, even though I know that the reality won’t be worth the effort. AIBU to think that it’s really unfair to still get this feeling, and that if my orgasms are going to go my desire to orgasm ought to go with them?