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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to say that graduation ceremonies are not the place to make political statements?

443 replies

anythingbutlillies · 09/07/2025 20:53

Hard hat on.

DC's graduation today. Fabulous day, but it did not sit well with me that a few chose to unfurl a flag / raise a scarf while they were on the stage.
Just no! So very selfish.

Interested to hear if I am being precious?

OP posts:
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5
BeachPossum · 10/07/2025 07:41

noblegiraffe · 10/07/2025 07:35

Did the OP say that other flags were unfurled? Other causes supported?

Did she say every single student unfurled a Palestinian flag? Clearly her own daughter at least did not.

You're determined to write off the activism of these students as a trendy bandwagon, because it allows you to be condescending and dismissive without engaging with the cause in any meaningful way. That's fine - do what suits you. You aren't their target audience anyway, and they don't care what you think.

Several universities have already commenced divestment from Israel in response to pressure from staff and students, including political protest. In light of that, I promise these students aren't worried about what some small-minded Pearl clutcher on mumsnet thinks about their actions.

noblegiraffe · 10/07/2025 07:39

Honestly it's FAR more upetting for anyone with a shred of decency that people like you are happy to watch the atocities Israel are committing and to think there is ANY moment that is inappropriate to speak out about it.

Love this. The suggestion that if you're pissed off about random virtue signalling on your child's special day that you are happy about what is happening in Gaza. Absolute smug self-righteousness of it all.

SnailPatronus · 10/07/2025 07:37

Annoyedone · 10/07/2025 07:19

So you’d be ok if other students unfurled the Israeli flag?

Of course not, because they’re committing genocide. But even if some people aren’t personally ok with it, isn’t that the whole point of political protest - to make people question how comfortable they are with something?

noblegiraffe · 10/07/2025 07:35

BeachPossum · 10/07/2025 07:08

Where are you getting the idea that everyone did this?

Did the OP say that other flags were unfurled? Other causes supported?

Strawberrryfields · 10/07/2025 07:34

MaturingCheeseball · 09/07/2025 22:39

At DD’s graduation students were warned that their degree would be revoked if there was any nonsense at the ceremony. What if everyone waved a flag of some sort?

Revoked?! How ridiculous. ‘Let’s crush these inquiring minds we’ve just helped create?’ Graduates are the exact people who should be heading out to change the world. Student protest is nothing new and protest is not about making people feel comfortable.

CinnamonJellyBeans · 10/07/2025 07:33

I can't think why anyone might feel uncomfortable when someone reminds them that genocide is being perpetrated.

Unless they agree with it happening, or don't care.

Annoyedone · 10/07/2025 07:19

Nn9011 · 09/07/2025 22:58

Education itself is political and it's students that are at the heart of political movements.
As for Jewish students - Zionism does NOT equate to Judaism, a Palestinian flag should not be offensive to a Jewish person. Israel is an occupational force commiting genocide and if the flag of the people being targeted is offensive then those people need to look at themselves.

So you’d be ok if other students unfurled the Israeli flag?

Genevieva · 10/07/2025 07:16

Soontobe60 · 10/07/2025 07:07

If you’re going to put numbers in, make sure they’re accurate.
This is from students who graduated in 2023.
83% of graduates were in employment or unpaid work, the majority of which (61%) were in full time employment, an increase of 5 percentage points compared to 2018–19. Of these, 11% were in part-time employment, and 10% a combination of employment and further study. A further 6% were in further study.

The proportion of graduates that were unemployed (5%) was the same as those that graduated in 2021 and 1 percentage point lower than in 2019

What this data doesn't say is what types of jobs those graduates were employed in.

https://www.universitiesuk.ac.uk/latest/insights-and-analysis/what-did-graduates-do-after-higher-0

My understanding is that within the U.K. economy about 20-25% of jobs can only be done by graduates. There’s a further similar proportion that are more often, but not exclusively, done by graduates, leaving about 55% of jobs in which a degree is neither a requirement nor a direct advantage. This indicates that the job market does not support all graduates being in graduate employment.

Writerscompanion · 10/07/2025 07:16

Genevieva · 10/07/2025 00:27

It’s unsuitable, unhelpful and vacuous attention seeking. If they care that much they should give money to suitable charities privately, not say ‘look at me and how worthy I think I am’ during a ceremony with a dedicated purpose of its own.

I doubt they could do this at the older universities, where the graduation is highly ceremonial, in Latin, with no stage and you kneel on the floor at the feet of the vice chancellor. It’s timeless and solemn. You feel as if you have stepped into a Renaissance painting.

You’d be quite wrong then: https://www.varsity.co.uk/news/29587

Graduating Cambridge student interrupts ceremony with pro-Palestine speech

Under the current injunction, the protester is liable for criminal damages if the University chooses to pursue them

https://www.varsity.co.uk/news/29587

BeachPossum · 10/07/2025 07:16

Genevieva · 10/07/2025 07:08

A lot of universities also use cathedrals, which makes it even more inappropriate. Saying that, I sometimes think the CofE under Welby has become more about promoting whatever the latest bandwagon agenda is than anything else. I find virtue signaling so irksome.

You're right. God forbid the Church be vocally opposed to genocide.

Soontobe60 · 10/07/2025 07:09

wineosaurusrex · 10/07/2025 06:52

Well what are you upset about then? Honestly it's FAR more upetting for anyone with a shred of decency that people like you are happy to watch the atocities Israel are committing and to think there is ANY moment that is inappropriate to speak out about it.

Haven't you seen the numerous videos of parents carrying the bloodsoaked bodies of their innocent children through the streets? Didn't you see the 6 year old girl trapped in a car with her dead family, begging for help, before being delibately shot to pieces by Israeli soldiers? Don't you see the emaciated children dying slow, painful deaths because they've been delivately starved by Israel?

Universities have always been places where students bravely make political stands and speak out against injustice, cruelty, and evil. This has been the case throughout history - think of the White Rose movement, the students who were executed for speaking out against the nazis in German universities, or think about the anti-Vietnam war protests in the US. These students are intelligent, brave and on the right side of history.

If it slightly spoiled your day then you need to give yourself a serious talking to. There are a lot of mothers in Gaza who are spending today in unimaginable grief, mourning the horrific death of their child, while you're safe in the UK enjoying your child's graduation. It really makes me sick that you have the audacity to complain about this.

Did you see the videos depicting the atrocities committed on 7/10 by Palestinians? No-one is a winner here - both sides are / have suffered atrocities.

BeachPossum · 10/07/2025 07:08

noblegiraffe · 09/07/2025 23:39

And yet it seems they all chose a Palestinian flag at this ceremony?

Where are you getting the idea that everyone did this?

Genevieva · 10/07/2025 07:08

anythingbutlillies · 10/07/2025 06:50

I agree with much of what you say.

However this was at one of the oldest universities which is also a Russell Group, and for a 'traditional' degree.

A lot of universities also use cathedrals, which makes it even more inappropriate. Saying that, I sometimes think the CofE under Welby has become more about promoting whatever the latest bandwagon agenda is than anything else. I find virtue signaling so irksome.

Soontobe60 · 10/07/2025 07:07

5128gap · 10/07/2025 06:54

97% of graduates have jobs within 15 months of graduation, so whatever you think of their politics you are entirely wrong about their prospects.

If you’re going to put numbers in, make sure they’re accurate.
This is from students who graduated in 2023.
83% of graduates were in employment or unpaid work, the majority of which (61%) were in full time employment, an increase of 5 percentage points compared to 2018–19. Of these, 11% were in part-time employment, and 10% a combination of employment and further study. A further 6% were in further study.

The proportion of graduates that were unemployed (5%) was the same as those that graduated in 2021 and 1 percentage point lower than in 2019

What this data doesn't say is what types of jobs those graduates were employed in.

https://www.universitiesuk.ac.uk/latest/insights-and-analysis/what-did-graduates-do-after-higher-0

anythingbutlillies · 10/07/2025 07:01

SnailPatronus · 10/07/2025 06:49

Yesterday 21:03

It takes significantly longer to get your flag out, unfurl it, hold it up and stand there awaiting additional applause than the normal process. Imagine if they all did that! So yes, selfish.

Again, still not saying I was resentful. More that it was making it all about them which simply wouldn't have been possible if all several hundred chose to do the same.

OP posts:
5128gap · 10/07/2025 06:54

ExercicenformedeZ · 09/07/2025 23:58

YANBU. The usual omnicause performative bullshit. These people are unemployable numpties.

97% of graduates have jobs within 15 months of graduation, so whatever you think of their politics you are entirely wrong about their prospects.

wineosaurusrex · 10/07/2025 06:52

anythingbutlillies · 10/07/2025 06:40

Where did I say I was upset because I was delayed for a bit? 🤔

Well what are you upset about then? Honestly it's FAR more upetting for anyone with a shred of decency that people like you are happy to watch the atocities Israel are committing and to think there is ANY moment that is inappropriate to speak out about it.

Haven't you seen the numerous videos of parents carrying the bloodsoaked bodies of their innocent children through the streets? Didn't you see the 6 year old girl trapped in a car with her dead family, begging for help, before being delibately shot to pieces by Israeli soldiers? Don't you see the emaciated children dying slow, painful deaths because they've been delivately starved by Israel?

Universities have always been places where students bravely make political stands and speak out against injustice, cruelty, and evil. This has been the case throughout history - think of the White Rose movement, the students who were executed for speaking out against the nazis in German universities, or think about the anti-Vietnam war protests in the US. These students are intelligent, brave and on the right side of history.

If it slightly spoiled your day then you need to give yourself a serious talking to. There are a lot of mothers in Gaza who are spending today in unimaginable grief, mourning the horrific death of their child, while you're safe in the UK enjoying your child's graduation. It really makes me sick that you have the audacity to complain about this.

anythingbutlillies · 10/07/2025 06:50

Genevieva · 10/07/2025 00:27

It’s unsuitable, unhelpful and vacuous attention seeking. If they care that much they should give money to suitable charities privately, not say ‘look at me and how worthy I think I am’ during a ceremony with a dedicated purpose of its own.

I doubt they could do this at the older universities, where the graduation is highly ceremonial, in Latin, with no stage and you kneel on the floor at the feet of the vice chancellor. It’s timeless and solemn. You feel as if you have stepped into a Renaissance painting.

I agree with much of what you say.

However this was at one of the oldest universities which is also a Russell Group, and for a 'traditional' degree.

OP posts:
Jennps · 10/07/2025 06:50

wineosaurusrex · 10/07/2025 06:38

Yes, how bizarre that they should use THEIR day to make a statement about something THEY are passionate about! Students should just stop using their brains and thinking altogether, right? It's just genocide, the massacre of innocent people, why do they even care?

These kind of people do more harm than good to the Palestinian people

Marylou2 · 10/07/2025 06:49

It's completely unacceptable. Graduation is about academic achievement not pointless virtue signalling. I bet they won't have considered the hostages who didn't get to finish their degrees.

SnailPatronus · 10/07/2025 06:49

anythingbutlillies · 10/07/2025 06:45

Where did I say I resented having to wait a little bit longer?

It was a joyous day that we wanted to last as long as possible.

Yesterday 21:03

It takes significantly longer to get your flag out, unfurl it, hold it up and stand there awaiting additional applause than the normal process. Imagine if they all did that! So yes, selfish.

anythingbutlillies · 10/07/2025 06:45

Staffling · 09/07/2025 23:39

In my view that is because it is a pretty obvious cause. I mean I think you have to be pretty callous if not inhumane to support the genocide in Gaza. I'm someone who pretty much always sits on the fence and I don't easily take sides. Even last year I might have wondered if maybe Israel was justified to try to completely root out hamas once but there is just no justification for what is going on now.

The one statistic that somehow really gets to me is that gaza now has the highest number of child amputees in the world. I mean just imagine that. And then imagine the conditions under which these amputations must have been carried out and the after care and support these kids can expect to receive. I think they deserve for the world to stop turning for a little bit and to at least empathise with their plight.

And then compare that to resenting having to wait a little bit longer at your child's graduation ceremony.

Where did I say I resented having to wait a little bit longer?

It was a joyous day that we wanted to last as long as possible.

OP posts:
Toddlerteaplease · 10/07/2025 06:43

Not as bad as the woman who wanted to take her toddler on stage with her. She’d brought him a cap and gown.

mids2019 · 10/07/2025 06:42

So what if an Israeli flag was unfurled for remembrance of the victims of October 7th and as signal to release hostages? What would the reaction of fellow students and parents be?

The naive virtue signalling support of a people governed by a heinous Islamist terrorist group is worrying and shows a distinct lack of critical thinking. Students should be debating ideas not rsorting to sloganeering.

You want to get one of them and get them to see if they can propose a roadmap to a solution to one of the most intractable conflicts in history.

anythingbutlillies · 10/07/2025 06:40

TravelPanic · 09/07/2025 23:26

Wow, so babies and children are being killed in their thousands and starved/maimed/orphaned in the tens of thousands and you’re upset because someone chose to raise a flag in support of those dead/injured/orphaned babies and children because it delayed you a little bit?

Wow. get a grip!!

Where did I say I was upset because I was delayed for a bit? 🤔

OP posts: