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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To HATE the word fart and just wish people would stop!!

144 replies

GospelOakCloak · 09/07/2025 19:40

Using this world all the time ! There’s no need !!

OP posts:
Squirrelsnut · 09/07/2025 20:46

Sat on a duck?
Made an air biscuit?
Trouser cough?

MartinAynuss · 09/07/2025 20:44

How about baking an air biscuit?

amicisimma · 09/07/2025 20:44

My extremely respectable grandmother (vicar's wife) reckoned it was a 'good Anglo-Saxon word'.

She didn't express any opinion on any other Anglo-Saxon words!

CheeseWisely · 09/07/2025 20:44

Toot in our house, largely due to a very tooty toddler.

Sulking · 09/07/2025 20:42

I’m on board with you OP 🤣 I like ‘purp’

Ponderingwindow · 09/07/2025 20:37

You might find this funny. Until I was about 7 or so, I didn’t think I had ever farted because I didn’t realize it was the same thing as passing gas. My family was very proper.

LSTMS30555 · 09/07/2025 20:34

Coughed in ya knickers?
my ass blowing a kiss

IcedPurple · 09/07/2025 20:33

YABVVU.

Fart is a great word. Poetic. Onomatopoeic.

And farts are hilarious. Always have been and always will be.

Ihitthetarget · 09/07/2025 20:30

Trump, or even better, trumpet or toot

whackamole666 · 09/07/2025 20:29

Yeoldlondoncheese · 09/07/2025 19:45

What would you prefer?

Passing gas
breaking wind
flatulence
tooting

😂

Trump / trumpet
Bottom burp
Who did that?

Toottooot · 09/07/2025 20:29

Sunshineofyourlove · 09/07/2025 20:16

In Scotland we say pump.

Reallly? Nobody I know uses pump🤷🏻‍♀️

outerspacepotato · 09/07/2025 20:29

Butt talk.

Bigi · 09/07/2025 20:28

Yeoldlondoncheese · 09/07/2025 19:45

What would you prefer?

Passing gas
breaking wind
flatulence
tooting

😂

It's a botty burp

ZamaZama · 09/07/2025 20:28

A thread on here years ago introduced me to ‘blowing off’, which apparently was the polite term in op’s home. Most unpleasant in my book!

fthisfthatfeverything · 09/07/2025 20:27

Period farts are best!
Silent and deadly 💨☠️

MonumentalError · 09/07/2025 20:25

Is “guff” better?

JMSA · 09/07/2025 20:24

Pump in Scotland. As a kid, the word fart was treated as a swear word in our house 🙄

LakieLady · 09/07/2025 20:23

Trouser cough.

cocoonscriticupgrading · 09/07/2025 20:22

Yeoldlondoncheese · 09/07/2025 19:45

What would you prefer?

Passing gas
breaking wind
flatulence
tooting

😂

Plus

Trump
Fluff
Let one go
Emit wind from anus

😂

BlackboardMonitorVimes · 09/07/2025 20:19

Squeaky bottom is the only way.

SunnieShine · 09/07/2025 20:19

Parp!

Sunshineofyourlove · 09/07/2025 20:16

In Scotland we say pump.

Esssa · 09/07/2025 20:05

We use fluffy thanks to the kids watching bluey.

PickledMuffin · 09/07/2025 20:03

I hate the word fart too. it’s trump in my home.

ooooohlala · 09/07/2025 20:02

My 2 year old has spontaneously started talking about ‘bottom thunder’ (after the storms at the weekend).

Shall We all follow her lead?