Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Loud Long Fart

208 replies

WhatTheHelll · 09/07/2025 17:14

Aibu to be livid over this encounter?

I was shopping today and as I passed a man he let out a very loud and very long fart right as I was level with him in the aisle. There’s no way it was accidental as it sounded very forced.

Makes me think that some men just hate women and do things like this to make them feel uncomfortable.

OP posts:
WeirdyBeardyMarrowBabyLady · 09/07/2025 21:26

@BeachPossum ’you've obviously got your ear in’ has really amused me for some reason 🤣🤣

Sampler · 09/07/2025 21:26

Misogyny aside, if anyone did a robust 20 second fart in my presence I’d give them a pat on the back and a firm handshake.

TwinklyOrca · 09/07/2025 21:25

amusedbush · 09/07/2025 17:34

It wasn't necessarily a targeted attack.

My mum once totally forgot her surroundings and let out a fart in the chilled aisle in Aldi. Although she at least had the grace to mumble "excuse me" before slinking away with her trolley 😂

😂😂😂😂😂😂

Internaut · 09/07/2025 21:25

CallingDistance · 09/07/2025 20:12

I dont fart nor does my crush

Show quote history

You definitely do. Both of you.

VehicleTracker77 · 09/07/2025 21:21

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

megacat · 09/07/2025 21:20

Can I suggest that you do some research on colostomy bags.

They make sound that is entirely uncontrollable and extremely embarrassing for the person.

As such it limits your life as the worry of making the sound in public places or even worse, having a leak, stops you from being able to enjoy a normal life.

Imagine living that life then some uneducated pearl clutcher writes a post about you on a forum? Usually after suffering the horror of bowel cancer, then having to deal with fools like yourself.

HeartyViper · 09/07/2025 21:18

By your logic, my 9 year old lactose intolerant son hates women, men, small children and animals, as he farts all the time, loud and smelly usually because there’s goddamn lactose in everything, and he has constant tummy issues.
Get a grip, OP.

FastMauveQuoter · 09/07/2025 21:17

This thread is brilliant, haven't laughed so much in ages. Thanks everyone xxx

OnTheBoardwalk · 09/07/2025 21:15

20 seconds is a long time ask Ross Geller

I’d have walked back past him and done a silent but deadly one and pointed at him

LaughingCat · 09/07/2025 21:05

BWAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Oh god, I needed this laugh today. Misogynistic force-parping 😂 I’ve heard it all now.

Shellyash · 09/07/2025 21:02

Was it your DH?

Topsyturvy78 · 09/07/2025 20:57

It's not healthy to hold farts in you know. My daughter jumps up and down and usually does a load of farts at the same time. 🤣🤣🤣 She has severe autism btw so she just doesn't so doesn't really care. She also suffers with constipation I do try calm her down but she loves going shopping.

yakkity · 09/07/2025 20:53

WhatTheHelll · 09/07/2025 17:33

You can tell it’s forced when it goes on for about 20 seconds at full volume when he’s right beside me in the aisle of a shop.

People can’t force out very long farts. The fact that it was long suggests it was NOT forced.
can you fart on command? I can’t. If I tried to push something out of my arse I’d probably shit myself

MaySea · 09/07/2025 20:52

WhatTheHelll · 09/07/2025 17:33

You can tell it’s forced when it goes on for about 20 seconds at full volume when he’s right beside me in the aisle of a shop.

Is that something you can do? I'm impressed! I'd probably shit myself if I tried that!

FlatErica · 09/07/2025 20:49

SerafinasGoose · 09/07/2025 18:57

My brother used to light his.

Show quote history

My mother used to light hers!

McSteamyorMcdreamy · 09/07/2025 20:49

I refuse to live in a world where farts aren't funny!

Growlybear83 · 09/07/2025 20:42

People in real life are a little more relaxed about normal bodily functions. It’s only on Mumsnet where people insist you can hold in a fart long enough to get to the toilet, or think that farting is an unforgivable crime. The fact that it was a very long fart doesn’t mean that it was forced - it just means they the man had a lot of wind to expel.

bigkahunaburger · 09/07/2025 20:38

Oh god. I have crohns. I have had accidental farts, sharts, and full on shit myself in public before. Its absolutely terrifying. It never occurred to me that people might think I do it on purpose!!! Believe me, you wouldn't want it. I always have to think about where the loos are, how long I have to reach them etc. Makes life quite hard at times. My brother who has it is even worse. He can't even drive for longer than 10 mins in case he gets caught in traffic and has to have a porta potty in the car.

Loud farts are the least of our worries tbh.

Oakcupboard · 09/07/2025 20:36

I accidentally farted one time as I sneezed, hadn’t even felt the need to before hand. It was so long and loud my backside actually hurt after it 🤷‍♀️ was very embarrassing listening to it echo

I do have severe IBS though

Katemax82 · 09/07/2025 20:33

If it was my son it wouldn't have been on purpose, he accidentally farted loudly at my daughters nativity

LeftieRightsHoarder · 09/07/2025 20:32

Toetouchingtitties · 09/07/2025 17:44

Did he look like he snapped then farted?

Sounds like he farted and OP snapped!

Thinking of the original “snapped and farted” post still makes me laugh out loud.

DrowningInSyrup · 09/07/2025 20:28

I'm horrified. That misogynistic little fart factory. Get him straight on the flatulence register.

Maninpeace · 09/07/2025 20:27

WhatTheHelll · 09/07/2025 17:14

Aibu to be livid over this encounter?

I was shopping today and as I passed a man he let out a very loud and very long fart right as I was level with him in the aisle. There’s no way it was accidental as it sounded very forced.

Makes me think that some men just hate women and do things like this to make them feel uncomfortable.

Yeah op, he clearly hates women. Couldn’t be anything else at all.