To leave nearly 18yo DS home alone while me and DH go away for the weekend?

No way would I go. I couldn’t care less about anything happening to the house, that can always be sorted, but I would be worried about him.

Yes but give him the talk of doom - a couple of mates tops, and if there is any damage or complaints or drama of any sort you will loose Xwhateverhecaresaboutx

I wouldn’t worry about a bottle of Malibu under the bed, it’s pretty normal

He’s 18. Trust him to behave responsibly and respectfully.

My parents went on holiday for 3 weeks when I was his age. I stayed home, looked after the pets and revised for my A Levels. It was great. No parties were had.

I did have the odd friend over but nothing dramatic, it was a takeaway pizza and a couple of glasses of wine.

Most teens fully appreciate the fun of going to a house party whilst knowing they absolutely would not want to be the one having to clear it up.

I take it you don’t trust your children.

OK, I’ll take this slowly for you… so why would she not want her son to have his friends round?

Why are you changing his sheets? He's an adult in a matter of weeks.

I mean this kindly but ....Transition him to adulthood already. He should be pretty much self sufficient. You're not doing him, yourself or any future partners, flat mates, house shares any favours by babying him.

Just go, honestly go and have fun. My parents would’ve left me alone at that age and I’d have friends over and we just ate chips and watched films!! What you’re imagining will be so much worse than reality OP.

Like that’s going to make any difference. 😂

Talk to him. Make it clear who he is allowed to invite. And discuss a plan for what he should do if anyone shows up uninvited.

This the word gets around and before your DS knows 30/40 people or more come round, l would not chance it.

It really depends on him. I remember my parents going away when I had just turned 18, it was me and my 16 year old sister. We had a couple of friends round, got a takeaway, had a few drinks, watched some films and then we all slept on the living room floor despite my sister and I having perfectly good beds, My parents knew my friends and we were all the responsible type though.

I also remember friends' parents going away and lots of drunk teenagers in the house. To be fair nothing got damaged and the most we got was a neighbour asking us to keep the noise down, which we duly did.

We were not rebels.

When I was that age I had my own place. Plenty of people round but it was never trashed.

I think it depends on the person. I could’ve been left home alone at that age as I would’ve been happy to watch tv, play video games and read. My sister would’ve had male and female friends over doing who knows what, she wasn’t very trustworthy and didn’t mature until she hit about 40 😂

There's no point either of you pretending he won't have people round, so you'll get more out of engaging with him and agreeing fair ground rules/consequences together. Assuming you feel he's mature enough.

When I was that age my parents were away a lot and took the approach of "We'll treat you like an adult until you act like a child." That meant I was largely left to my own devices as far as who came over and what we did, but there would be adult consequences if I took the piss.

Any of their booze that was touched had to be replaced (they had the sense to remove the good stuff). Nobody in their bedroom or my dad's office. Nobody to drive their cars. Stains, breakages etc had to be paid for. House to look identical upon their return. No noise complaints.

Possibly the best advice 😂

OP honestly I would go.

He is your son and you should trust him. Make sure he is clear on any rules. If anything is damaged or broken he will have to pay (in whatever way you deem fit).

I am always reading on MN about people leaving their teens and massive parties getting out of hand (I bet some ppl have posted this on here) but really we should give our teens more credit than that.

If he is almost 18 he can leave and get married and work and go to uni, join the army, learn to drive, get a tattoo...two nights without his parents should be fine. Trust him to behave as the adult he pretty much is.

FWIW we went on a week's holiday without DS2 when he was 17.5. He could have come but didn't want to. I called him every day and he had some friends round one night to watch the match. The worst thing that happened was when he tried a recipe for a veg curry and it went wrong so he had to bin it. When we came home the house was very clean and tidy. All good.

It's quite a big responsibility on him to control his mates. If this is the first time then boundaries could be pushed. How are friends getting there? Driving? As I wouldn't want to ask 17 year olds to be coming round (for a few beers) then leaving. I wouldn't even leave booze within reach.

If you were there I.e. back later the same evening it would be a different scenario.

When I was 17/18, when friends parents including mine were having a weekend away, it was invite everyone you know, get trashed, then there's a big clear up.

Ha ha! I remember my parents going away when I was this age. I had the best house party and my parents knew I had had a party because the house was SPOTLESS when they got back 🙃

Remind him of the rules:

Don’t add to the population
Don’t subtract from the population
Stay out of the newspapers, hospital and jail.

About 50 years ago when I was 17, I stayed home while my parents went to Spain for 2 weeks. Yes, I had my small group of friends round (about 8 of us) as it was much cheaper than drinking at the pub. No damage, no parties, no problem.

He's nearly 18. You should probably have already done this by now, but as you haven't, do it, it is good for him to learn some independence

17 yo dd has been alone for the night. Going away for a weekend in September and leaving her. She had some friends round. It was fine.

Firstly, you don’t have to explain to us where you’re going and trust it’s ’nothing Posh’. Go to the Ritz if you want to!
Secondly, why would you deny yourselves a break?

You should go on your trip at 17 he's old enough to take responsibility and understand respecting your house and rules. If he parties then he pays for damages!

We went away for a week last year leaving my 19yo daughter and 17yo son home. Came home to a slightly messy house but they were fine. They were both working so couldn’t come with us.