Didn’t get promoted and am devastated - please help

How did the meeting go, OP?

I would go to this meeting with questions prepared and take some notes.
Ask for feedback back on the interview and how you answered the questions.
Ask about where your current skills need to be improved upon? Ask are there any courses or extra training you can do? Can your company cover the cost of these? See in their rules if they say pay for a masters degree how long you have to stay with them to avoid paying them back for this.

I would see what your boss has to say, remain professional and take notes. See if this feedback is fair or if your been fobbed off. Some bosses are quite happy leaving a good person in a certain role because they are a safe pair of hands, get on with the rest of the team and will do possibly unpaid overtime when things are busy.

If your not happy with what you're been told I would stay put for a few months and see what the new people are like that got the role you applied to. Work on what let you down at the interview and what your boss said was lacking for the next rung of the ladder. The new people might not stay and this role could come up again.

I would also reduce or stop doing overtime as well and just say you have plans that evening.

Start to look at other businesses ect in your area and look at the job websites. You might find a better role with more money elsewhere and you can apply for it.
If you get a better job elsewhere thank your boss for their help and leave on a good terms with them.

I have a friend in a similar position to you. She has been working PT for a company and her boss won't change her hours. She has realised that one of her work day is busy and it can be short staffed for a number of reasons. She is good at her job and can do everything. She makes her bosses life easier when she is there.
My friend knows that things are not going to change where she works. She has a few things on this year. She has decided to look for a new job with more hours early next year because long term it will be better for her.

I feel for you OP, you clearly are very committed.
In my experience, as hard as it is, hard work, commitment and dedication doesn't always pay. Sad but true

I feel for you OP but your situation is far from unique in the organisation that I work in.
I've never applied for internal promotion so I don't have your experience but several of my colleagues have.
I can envisage feeling unappreciated and let down but it's important to remain objective.
In my experience, sometimes an outside person can bring fresh eyes and insight into an organisation which ime is needed at times.
We all have developmental needs.
Please meet with your manager and let them know how you feel but please listen to the feedback.
Best wishes and treat yourself to something special

Put it in an email. Tell him the truth so they know how much you care and ask for the feedback in writing so you can digest it in your own time. But be aware, sometimes they can be more honest in person and say things that they wouldn't put in writing. You need this feedback.

This - and especially the bit about dialling down the emotion

You mentioned "Why only 15 minutes?" OP, and I'm wondering if they feel this is all you might be able to cope with - though with the intention of spending longer if it goes productively

Don't mean to kick you when youre down OP but you seem very sensitive about this whole thing. Was the role you were applying for looking for someone with a thicker skin perhaps? If is more responsibility would it have meant more chance of butting heads with other teams that they didnt see you coping too well with?

Kindly, you need to dial down the emotion ahead of the meeting to get the best out of it OP. It’s not a chance for you to prove them wrong, or to put your best self across. It’s at worst a tick box exercise for him and at best a list of things you can think about for next time.
It’s a bit like meeting up with someone who’s dumped you unexpectedly, it’s natural to be full of questions and want to know why, but they’re already beyond it and just want to give you your stuff back.

Without knowing more about your job, it’s hard to say - 15 minutes doesn’t sound like a lot but if he turns up on time, is thoughtful in his feedback and uses the full time then maybe it is okay. BUT if it has been squeezed in between a load of other stuff, he turns up late and flustered and leaves early then this is an Oh shit, I need to placate OP somehow situation.

Sit up straight, don’t say much, take notes.

Get looking for another job. They don't value you. And I wouldn't bother with the feedback- when clearly experienced and competent people like you don't get promotions, it's nearly always for a personal reason or something to do with your personality (or even your looks- I've seen it happen, attractive people being "given" promotions over equally or even more experienced candidates!).
Or maybe they even don't want you to move up: Being good or very skilled at your job can actually be detrimental, as management and higher ups are worried that you will take their job or future opportunities (either from them or from their "favourites").
They will also, like you boss, encourage you to apply and interview whilst having no intention of giving you the job- they just feel that they "have" to interview you. So feedback will likely make you feel even more shit (although your boss of course won't say the real, more likely reasons outright: He will likely give vague, glossed-over, bullshit reasons to prevent a discrimination complaint!).
A lot of the time people get promotions simply because they're confident/gobby, have a lot in common with the boss, or are just very good looking- it's sadly nothing to do with their skills.

Since your boss is a man, then were one or both of the candidates an attractive female? Just saying.....

I feel for you, it sucks.

I went for 3 internal jobs last year and didn't get any of them - 1 went to someone else (fair enough) and 2 went to external hires. What makes matters worse is now I work for 1 of those external hires, and he is a poor manager.

It was draining and really made me question staying at the company. But in all other regards it's a good company. So I'm taking the long term view and just doing the job I have - don't really have much choice.

I've mostly come to terms with it by now, but it has taken a solid 12 months to get there. And if I stop and think about it it still really irks me to work for someone who to be blunt, I think is less competent than I am. But hopefully, it's a 1-2 year setback, not a permanent problem.

So, I'd say it will get better with time, but if it's a good company to stay with then you have to do your best to get over it and get back to a productive, engaged mindset, and work out that longer-term plan of how you will move up in the future.

15 minutes should be fine to give you feedback on your interview performance, what went well and what could be improved.

If it brings up further questions which there isn't time to address, ask for another meeting at a later date.

Go in armed with the questions you have.

ask for his honest feedback. Listen, take notes don’t interrupt.

then ask if he was you what his next step would be. Would he work
on interview techniques, seek out wider experience, consider a job change? Open questions and listen to his answers.

he is probably a bit nervous as well - people make complaints about things all the time and they are hugely time consuming. So he will want to be careful about what he says.

at the end of the day this is all just his opinion, another perspective to consider. But it’s your career and the only personal driving it is you

Honestly I think you are overthinking it.

It’s perfectly possible to provide short feedback in 15 minutes. I would really caution against trying to use the session to justify why you should have got the job. That ship has sailed.

Ask for the feedback, take notes and ask if once you have reflected on it you have questions, then can you come back to them.

this happened to me a month ago was acting in a higher role for six months went to interview for the permanent role but did not get. It took me three weeks to get feedback from my manager as I was not in a space to hear it Feedback from my manager was the successful candidate just had more management experience. My written and verbal interview were strong and I didn’t stuff up the interview . I am glad I got the feedback and it has made me realise I can’t go back to my lower position as I have outgrown it. I now have a polished CV and I’m actively applying for other roles. Time for a new challenge. Good luck OP!

OP, I recently had to do something similar with a team member. I encouraged him to apply as I wanted him to progress but then at interview, he sadly showed how little experience he had. I was gutted as I was really rooting for him. Although he didn’t get the job, I’ve since said I’ll spend some time mentoring him (if he wants that).

very hurtful to be in this situation. But if you like the company, it might be worth staying and progressing until another job comes up?

He’s your manager. This is not inconveniencing him, this is asking him to do a critical part of his job. He can put 20 mins into an email to you or he can put 10-20 hours into hiring someone to replace you, don’t feel in the slightest bad!!

that said, he might well be supportive of your career. Go to the meeting with an open mind. I’ve applied for a volunteer job and learnt the person who got it was soooo much senior to me, we don’t even compare. I was like ‘oh shit I really misjudged that. I hope they didn’t laugh at my cv.’
and, more recently, we had a position open in our team with the idea of it being that an existing junior applies and gets the promotion. But we have to advertise internally and externally and someone quite experienced internally contacted me about it. I was stressed, as we are required to interview fairly and it would be possible this other person got it instead and we wouldn’t promote my colleague. We have to ask similar questions and rate the answers, there is an interview assessment process. My point is it’s complicated, there are rules, and we often don’t get to just choose re applicants for hiring and promotions, which doesn’t mean we don’t mean well for our own team. See how you go.

All feedback is good feedback! 🙃🫠

That's great. All I'm saying is I understand you're feeling down about it, but don't as they obviously value you that they thought you were a potential candidate

😂 Never mind eh? As it turns out, it was a blessing in disguise missing out on those other jobs even though it hurt at the time. Some things just aren’t meant to be.

Not surprising with that attitude. You can have the skills and experience and someone else can be better. Also often "fresh blood" is better as they bring new ideas, different experiences etc