Page 23 | To want to nip this in the bud ( LGBTQ views , child )

Calmorchaos · 2025-07-08T18:31:10+00:00

I’m after some advice really on how to approach this. I have always been the type of person to support anyone to be who they are. I’ve never shied away or shielded my children from the world - very much a ‘love is love’ person and always encouraged my children to support those who need it and be inclusive ( in terms of people being bullied , disabilities etc too ) . My youngest is going into high school ( 11 ) . Over the past few months I’ve noticed a few comments such as “ there are 2 genders “ , “ I don’t support LGBTQ “ . I’ve addressed this in the moment . But recently he found out his new school has an LGBTQ assembly on a monthly basis and he has started saying he doesn’t want to go because “ he doesn’t support it” . I sat down and had a chat with him , I explained to him that it isn’t really his place to choose to not agree with it - it’s not a choice , i explained it as he could say he doesn’t agree with people eating meat as that is a choice he would be making , but someone’s sexuality is their feelings and not a choice. I am sure comments will allow me to explain more how the conversation went from my side so I won’t drag this post on with that but his comments were unnerving : - he believes someone chooses to be gay , they can control it but they choose it - we can choose who we fall in love with - if a friend of his told him he was gay he would still be friends with them but not as good because they chose to be gay and he doesn’t support it. I know he is very young and he doesn’t understand and has things to learn. He is the sweetest boy and the way he said these things sounded scripted as though he has heard others say this . I know he is a child and it’s my job that guide him and that’s the advice I’m asking for , how do I address this? I’m not saying I need him to go around advocating I just don’t want these views becoming ingrained and he becomes the reason another student who is struggling, struggles more. I know I may be overreacting but this age and as the years go on is a time that he can be heavily influenced . He’s a quiet, sweet boy and I do believe he could be heavily influenced. Another concerning thing is that when I asked him where he had heard all this and where it comes from he said his Dad .

PurpleAxe · 09/07/2025 23:02

Right. It isn't his business, and therefore it isn't his problem.

He shouldn't have to support/not support anyone if he doesn't want to.

He can be mates with whoever he wants to, for whatever reason he wants to.

He needs to be polite, and not be rude, but he DOESN'T have to do anything else.

This is your backlash, all of the singing dancing, support support support celebrate, ignore any sensible discussion and conflate simple sexuality with a myriad of other nonsense has resulted in the current crop of kids rolling their eyes and thinking you are all a bunch of nobheads. Well done!

We have gone from most people not giving a shit if you are gay, to lots of people thinking gay=drag queen and sexualising children. Good job LGBTQI+ team! Fucking idiots.

JHound · 09/07/2025 22:56

BundleBoogie · 09/07/2025 22:01

But you said this - Nope 11 is plenty old enough to have some idea of your sexuality

So are you expecting all 11 yr olds to have decided on their sexuality or not? Do you think that some, especially those who have not start to sexually mature, may not be ready to think about sexuality yet?

Yet again - he is a child and is not practising conversion therapy. I’m not sure you have much understanding of children.

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I literally was talking to my niece today about this boy she met at a school camp. She clearly fancied him and I asked her if he was her boyfriend and she responded “I would like him to be”.

She is 11. Young children can have crushes and be very aware of their sexuality.

JHound · 09/07/2025 22:50

Calmorchaos · 08/07/2025 19:59

Yes he is , he idolises his Dad. This worries me too. He loves our son , provides well etc and would do anything for him but he has other views / behaviours too that I don’t want my son to be influenced by and I feel I do have a bit of a battle ahead.

I will be continuing these conversations with my son, gentle but challenging like you say sounds like a good way forward

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Were these views you have always known his father had?

I guess all you can do is continually point out the other side.

CaptainFuture · 09/07/2025 22:27

Fk48fj · 09/07/2025 22:12

I think you need to educate yourself a bit more. Puberty is taught in primary school. The NSPCC lists what is common in 9-13 olds.

learning.nspcc.org.uk/child-health-development/sexual-behaviour#article-top

9- to 13-year-olds
During these ages, children begin to get more curious about sex and relationships. They may start to be attracted to other people. Examples of typical sexual behaviour during this stage are:

having or wanting to have a romantic relationship with peers (of the same or different gender) (National Sexual Violence Resource Centre, 2013; Virtual Lab School, 2021)
using sexual language, making jokes about sex or discussing sexual acts with peers (SECASA, 2017; Stop It Now, 2007; Virtual Lab School, 2021)
wanting more privacy (National Sexual Violence Resource Centre, 2013; NCTSN, 2009; SECASA, 2017; Virtual Lab School, 2021)

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What? It is so yawnsome the pathetic cry of educate yourself!! because it always means 'you need to show you you are in thrall to our ideology'.... repent, repent oh sinner...

senua · 09/07/2025 22:21

having or wanting to have a romantic relationship with peers (of the same or different gender) (National Sexual Violence Resource Centre, 2013; Virtual Lab School, 2021)
Gender? Are you happy with the NSPCC using that language?

Fk48fj · 09/07/2025 22:13

BundleBoogie · 09/07/2025 22:07

Yes, it’s concerning how many adults are desperate for children to be pushed into early sexualisation. I know 11 yr old boys - they are so young looking.

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Nobody is pushing children into early sexualisation they are simply not tolerating homophobia.

Fk48fj · 09/07/2025 22:12

CaptainFuture · 09/07/2025 22:05

This....children of 11, ready to be sexual beings?...🤢 well we all know whose ideology that is...

Edited

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I think you need to educate yourself a bit more. Puberty is taught in primary school. The NSPCC lists what is common in 9-13 olds.

learning.nspcc.org.uk/child-health-development/sexual-behaviour#article-top

9- to 13-year-olds
During these ages, children begin to get more curious about sex and relationships. They may start to be attracted to other people. Examples of typical sexual behaviour during this stage are:

having or wanting to have a romantic relationship with peers (of the same or different gender) (National Sexual Violence Resource Centre, 2013; Virtual Lab School, 2021)
using sexual language, making jokes about sex or discussing sexual acts with peers (SECASA, 2017; Stop It Now, 2007; Virtual Lab School, 2021)
wanting more privacy (National Sexual Violence Resource Centre, 2013; NCTSN, 2009; SECASA, 2017; Virtual Lab School, 2021)

Relationships and sex education (RSE) resources for schools | NSPCC Learning

Sex and relationships education teaching resources to help you prepare for the RSE curriculum in England.

https://learning.nspcc.org.uk/safeguarding-child-protection-schools/relationships-health-and-sex-education-resources

BundleBoogie · 09/07/2025 22:07

CaptainFuture · 09/07/2025 22:05

This....children of 11, ready to be sexual beings?...🤢 well we all know whose ideology that is...

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Yes, it’s concerning how many adults are desperate for children to be pushed into early sexualisation. I know 11 yr old boys - they are so young looking.

CaptainFuture · 09/07/2025 22:07

Oh but @BundleBoogie as long as they are 'kind'..... but only to the selective few who agree unquestionably with their idealogy...

BundleBoogie · 09/07/2025 22:05

CaptainFuture · 09/07/2025 21:59

Probably because this poster like many gender idealogists has the fixed belief that they and their dc are the most Important people ever, that people may have a lack of experience or education, just that if they don't adhere to @Fk48fj beliefs then they should be punished and hung drawn and quartered. Punish before education...

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True.

Although that pp talked about men in dresses so it might not be coming from a belief in gender ideology but maybe a lack of understanding of child development and an extreme intolerance of other views. PP may have backed themselves into a corner snd is now just arguing a position which I desperately hope isn’t reflected in their irl views.

CaptainFuture · 09/07/2025 22:05

BundleBoogie · 09/07/2025 22:01

But you said this - Nope 11 is plenty old enough to have some idea of your sexuality

So are you expecting all 11 yr olds to have decided on their sexuality or not? Do you think that some, especially those who have not start to sexually mature, may not be ready to think about sexuality yet?

Yet again - he is a child and is not practising conversion therapy. I’m not sure you have much understanding of children.

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This....children of 11, ready to be sexual beings?...🤢 well we all know whose ideology that is...

Fk48fj · 09/07/2025 22:04

BundleBoogie · 09/07/2025 22:01

But you said this - Nope 11 is plenty old enough to have some idea of your sexuality

So are you expecting all 11 yr olds to have decided on their sexuality or not? Do you think that some, especially those who have not start to sexually mature, may not be ready to think about sexuality yet?

Yet again - he is a child and is not practising conversion therapy. I’m not sure you have much understanding of children.

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Nope kids can and decide on their sexuality at various ages but by 11 many will have some idea. Those that are gay deserve to be protected and those developing homophobic views need to be educated and dealt with when they are offensive and ignoring what is made clear in schools.

Fk48fj · 09/07/2025 22:01

CaptainFuture · 09/07/2025 21:59

Probably because this poster like many gender idealogists has the fixed belief that they and their dc are the most Important people ever, that people may have a lack of experience or education, just that if they don't adhere to @Fk48fj beliefs then they should be punished and hung drawn and quartered. Punish before education...

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Nope they were educated before and after the incidents. Education is part of the exclusion process. There really was no excuse same as when children express racism. It needs to be dealt with promptly, robustly and not just ignored.

BundleBoogie · 09/07/2025 22:01

Fk48fj · 09/07/2025 21:48

Nope of course children don’t need to decide on their sexuality but many are thinking about it. A child saying gay people choose to be gay and can control it are voicing views no different to conversion therapy and it’s not ok. No teacher will have told children this because it’s homophobic.

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But you said this - Nope 11 is plenty old enough to have some idea of your sexuality

So are you expecting all 11 yr olds to have decided on their sexuality or not? Do you think that some, especially those who have not start to sexually mature, may not be ready to think about sexuality yet?

Yet again - he is a child and is not practising conversion therapy. I’m not sure you have much understanding of children.

CaptainFuture · 09/07/2025 21:59

BundleBoogie · 09/07/2025 21:53

Why are you making things up that this boy hasn’t done?

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Probably because this poster like many gender idealogists has the fixed belief that they and their dc are the most Important people ever, that people may have a lack of experience or education, just that if they don't adhere to @Fk48fj beliefs then they should be punished and hung drawn and quartered. Punish before education...

Fk48fj · 09/07/2025 21:56

BundleBoogie · 09/07/2025 21:53

Why are you making things up that this boy hasn’t done?

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I am replying to the poster who criticised me being happy children were punished at my son’s school. Their views were left to fester and turned into homophobic language being used in earshot and then taunting. It was dealt with seriously and led to exclusions which I was happy with.

Fk48fj · 09/07/2025 21:54

Don’t be ridiculous. Obsessing over transgender issues and ignoring blatant homophobia being expressed by a child is not engaging in good faith.

The op needs to act because her child will end up getting into trouble further down the line if such views are left to fester and offensive views such as this are voiced publicly. Ignoring is doing a disservice to her own child and to gay children attending the school. As such she has updated and quite rightly said she’s going to be dealing with it.I think she’s handling it really well.

BundleBoogie · 09/07/2025 21:53

Fk48fj · 09/07/2025 21:39

Yep when those ignorant views turn into teasing and homophobic language causing huge distress to gay pupils within the school punishment is needed. There is no excuse, children are educated and spoken to when views are offensive.

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Why are you making things up that this boy hasn’t done?

Fk48fj · 09/07/2025 21:48

BundleBoogie · 09/07/2025 21:43

So you are saying that all children must decide on their sexuality at age 11 regardless of their stage of maturity or whether they’ve even started puberty? Are you actually serious?

I’m sure you think you are saying this for the right reasons but honestly, I think you’re taking it way too far. He is not engaging in conversion therapy - seriously!

If you deem what he says to be homophobic I think you’re barking up the wrong tree - he is a child being confused due to inappropriate and incorrect information he is being told.

The thing that OP said about people being born in the wrong body is the homophobic view although I’m sure it’s through misinformation not malice.

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Nope of course children don’t need to decide on their sexuality but many are thinking about it. A child saying gay people choose to be gay and can control it are voicing views no different to conversion therapy and it’s not ok. No teacher will have told children this because it’s homophobic.

TheKeatingFive · 09/07/2025 21:44

Some children will be aware of their sexuality at 11. Many won't be.

Surely that's not very difficult to understand.

BundleBoogie · 09/07/2025 21:43

Fk48fj · 09/07/2025 21:31

Nope 11 is plenty old enough to have some idea of your sexuality and all gay children have the right to go to school without being subjected to the homophobic views listed by the op from her child which she is quite rightly concerned about. Believing that being gay can be controlled is conversation therapy which is hugely damaging and not ok in any school. Those views are what she is concerned about and what this thread is about. They are not ok and no school will tolerate them.

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So you are saying that all children must decide on their sexuality at age 11 regardless of their stage of maturity or whether they’ve even started puberty? Are you actually serious?

I’m sure you think you are saying this for the right reasons but honestly, I think you’re taking it way too far. He is not engaging in conversion therapy - seriously!

If you deem what he says to be homophobic I think you’re barking up the wrong tree - he is a child being confused due to inappropriate and incorrect information he is being told.

The thing that OP said about people being born in the wrong body is the homophobic view although I’m sure it’s through misinformation not malice.

TheKeatingFive · 09/07/2025 21:43

Fk48fj · 09/07/2025 21:41

She is focused on the listed homophobia coming out of her son’s mouth. It isn’t ok and won’t be tolerated in any school or workplace. So quite rightly she does need to nip it in the bud.

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You're just ignoring the evidence right in front of your eyes. She has referenced transgender identities in more than one post.

If you can't acknowledge what's right in front of you, you clearly aren't engaging in good faith.

Fk48fj · 09/07/2025 21:41

TheKeatingFive · 09/07/2025 21:38

This thread isn’t about men dressed as women

Literally the first point raised by the OP is this ...

Over the past few months I’ve noticed a few comments such as “ there are 2 genders “

The OP's son seems to be too
young to have personal experience of his own sexuality yet. Which is totally normal.

However the very adults who are educating him on this important topic, are also filling his head with nonsense about people being 'born in the wrong body'. So is it any great wonder he's confused about who/what to trust, particularly when he's very young and presumably hasn't experienced his own sexuality in any meaningful way yet?

This is the price that we pay when we take all this too far.

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She is focused on the listed homophobia coming out of her son’s mouth. It isn’t ok and won’t be tolerated in any school or workplace. So quite rightly she does need to nip it in the bud.

Fk48fj · 09/07/2025 21:39

CaptainFuture · 09/07/2025 21:33

The really tedious thing is the constant refusal to recognise that the gender ideology (brought up in the OP)is the truly homophobic movement and if trusted adults undermine themselves by telling lies to children, we end up with confused children.
The intolerance from adults toward a young boy who now doesn’t know who he trusts to tell him the truth is astounding.
This and the gleeful pitchforks out against young dc.. especially the poster who was so pleased of the punishment administered to 11 year olds at her dc school... so don't attempt to understand why they think like that and educate them....PUNISHMENT!! As that's the best way to productively move on positively...🙄

Yep when those ignorant views turn into teasing and homophobic language causing huge distress to gay pupils within the school punishment is needed. There is no excuse, children are educated and spoken to when views are offensive.

TheKeatingFive · 09/07/2025 21:38

Fk48fj · 09/07/2025 21:17

This thread isn’t about men dressed as women but about the homophobic views quoted by the child in the op so enough already with yet another thread being turned in the oh so tedious trans debate.

he believes someone chooses to be gay , they can control it but they choose it
we can choose who we fall in love with
if a friend of his told him he was gay he would still be friends with them but not as good because they chose to be gay and he doesn’t support it.

Show quote history

This thread isn’t about men dressed as women

Literally the first point raised by the OP is this ...

Over the past few months I’ve noticed a few comments such as “ there are 2 genders “

The OP's son seems to be too
young to have personal experience of his own sexuality yet. Which is totally normal.

However the very adults who are educating him on this important topic, are also filling his head with nonsense about people being 'born in the wrong body'. So is it any great wonder he's confused about who/what to trust, particularly when he's very young and presumably hasn't experienced his own sexuality in any meaningful way yet?

This is the price that we pay when we take all this too far.