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Scruffy jeans at new job - does it matter?

115 replies

ScruffyTrouserMindFlip · 07/07/2025 20:17

My OH has just started a new job (this was his 3rd day). It's for a night manager at Tesco on £37k. Today he was not customer facing - just doing paperwork etc and training. They said he should wear jeans.

The thing is, the jeans he wore were, imo, really scruffy. Also, I think that looking smart does matter, especially in a managerial role, and especially when you are new.

However, he says I don't know what I'm on about, because I have an office job and it's different. Also that no-one said anything to him about his appearance, and they would have done, if it were an issue.

It makes me feel like I'm mad, that to me it's so obvious that you don't go into work looking like that, but another person can be equally gobsmacked that anyone would think it mattered at sll! I would be more than happy to hear that I'm wrong. Just need some honest, unbiased views!

YABU - The jeans are fine / no-one will think twice.

YANBU - Employers do still care about this sort of thing

OP posts:
DragonTrainor · 10/07/2025 07:54

They just look like jeans.

If he is happy with what he wore and no one has raised any concerns, why are you posting photos of your DH's jeans on the internet?

Your behaviour is very strange IMHO

goingtotown · 10/07/2025 07:51

They are scruffy, put them in the recycling bin.

FinallyHere · 10/07/2025 07:29

can't help but feel that it can't hurt his chances of keeping a job / being taken on permanently, to look smart though. But maybe it is irrelevant.

gently, this really isn’t a hill to die on and I think you are projecting your fears about his future and propensity to get fired into a pair of jeans. Relax. Let him find his feet in his own way.

I really wish I could have you visit some of our buildings and let you see the range of things people wear. Nowadays it’s all about bringing your whole self to work rather than dressing to impress. No one cares about how you look. It’s what you do that matters.

if you want to get involved try asking him what he has noticed and to grasp any opportunities than come around. If he can get on the ladder and has what it takes, a management career in a big supermarket can be very rewarding.

way more so than as a primary teacher. Good luck.

DappledThings · 09/07/2025 22:59

RaininSummer · 09/07/2025 22:53

How on earth, and why on earth, would people walk with jeans under their shoes? Sounds both impractical and utterly filthy..

When I've done it it's because I've not realised how long they are first time wearing them. Perils of short legs like OP says her husband has. They drag on the ground and get a bit worn and dirty at the bottoms. It's quite easily done.

RaininSummer · 09/07/2025 22:53

How on earth, and why on earth, would people walk with jeans under their shoes? Sounds both impractical and utterly filthy..

UsingAMansNameInAWomensWorld · 08/07/2025 01:12

saltinesandcoffeecups · 08/07/2025 00:54

Here you go:

Exhibit A

Exhibit B

I raise you

https://www.mrporter.com/en-gb/mens/product/balenciaga/clothing/straight-jeans/super-destroyed-wide-leg-jeans

UsingAMansNameInAWomensWorld · 08/07/2025 01:09

DappledThings · 07/07/2025 22:23

They're just a bit grubby at the bottom where they've trailed on the ground. I wouldn't notice that, I don't spend any time looking at the backs of anyone's ankles. I bet it's barely noticeable when he's wearing them.

Exactly

They aren't dirty or scruffy. They are worn because he walks on the backs. You wouldn't even see that because it would be under his shoes

saltinesandcoffeecups · 08/07/2025 00:54

Here you go:

Exhibit A

Exhibit B

saltinesandcoffeecups · 08/07/2025 00:49

I think you are overthinking this.

He could literally go out and spend hundreds on a pair of jeans that look exactly like this. I have VP’s of my not overly casual company wear similar.

Kindly, get off his back and let him navigate his job as he sees fit.

sweetpickle2 · 08/07/2025 00:25

They look fine to me, he wasn’t customer facing that day and was literally told to wear jeans.

If as an adult my partner was not only telling me off like a child for my choice in clothes, but photographing them and putting them on the internet for a second opinion, I’d think they were bonkers.

GoFaster83 · 08/07/2025 00:16

Nope. They are dirty, not scruffy. Get him to give them a good clean and they'd be fine.

DappledThings · 07/07/2025 22:23

They're just a bit grubby at the bottom where they've trailed on the ground. I wouldn't notice that, I don't spend any time looking at the backs of anyone's ankles. I bet it's barely noticeable when he's wearing them.

RaininSummer · 07/07/2025 22:21

They actually look filthy to me like he's been wading through mud.

MoominUnderWater · 07/07/2025 22:12

They look dirty from the back. And if I was his boss I’d notice that and worry about his attitude to keeping the store clean, etc? And I wear ripped (clean) jeans to work so I have no issue with being a bit scruffy/casual. But not stained like that.

Doggymummar · 07/07/2025 22:10

I think they meant clean jeans, not dog walking jeans

BettyCrockerClinic · 07/07/2025 22:06

He was told to wear jeans. He’s wearing jeans. Are you the type who always knows best?

Minnie798 · 07/07/2025 22:05

He was literally told to wear jeans, as he was just doing training and not customer facing. So for today, they were fine.

SpanielsGalore · 07/07/2025 21:55

They're fine for his role on that day.
I get where you are coming from, but standards seem to have slipped these days. My DS is a manager for a rival supermarket. When he started it was all suit trousers, shirts and ties. Now it's jeans, chinos and polo shirts.

Midgetwithaplan · 07/07/2025 21:44

They're fine for training as a night manager, but when not training it would be better to wear jeans that aren't stained as even night managers are customer facing as they normally start at 10 and stores don't shut til midnight. If he doesn't want to buy trousers, he'll have an allocation he can order through his tesco login, I get 5 pairs of shorts or trousers that I can order even though I don't have to wear uniform at all

AhBiscuits · 07/07/2025 21:43

They're fine. I work in an office and people wear scruffier stuff than that all the time and no one cares.

ScruffyTrouserMindFlip · 07/07/2025 21:42

"In these very casual days, if in doubt, it’s a good rule to be be slightly overdressed" was almost what I said, word-for word @theunbreakablecleopatrajones

OP posts:
TempestTost · 07/07/2025 21:41

I would say they are rather scruffy unless he was doing messy work that day. As a manager it's also partly about looking like you have a little more gravitas.

EmeraldShamrock000 · 07/07/2025 21:39

A lot of people dress more casual, sloppy, the date of caring are gone, in non customer services roles.

Yanbu, you should keep clothing clean, fresh.

My old boss was always dress very professional, his children took over, two sloppy lads in casual clothing, the staff have following the lead, it is casual Friday and worse everyday.

Pyjama next.

ScruffyTrouserMindFlip · 07/07/2025 21:38

Brendathebear · 07/07/2025 20:24

I do agree, those jeans are scruffy and probably not the best for work.

Is it a funny angle? They look really short

He has short legs!

OP posts:
ScruffyTrouserMindFlip · 07/07/2025 21:37

Cherrysoup · 07/07/2025 21:36

Male primary teachers seem highly prized. The new job period for September is well past, but I’m surprised he’s not been snapped up.

Not as much as you'd think, because there are just so many applicants for every position. In this area at least.

OP posts: