Page 4 | 'Use your words' GET TO FUCK

Zov · 07/07/2025 20:17

SchnizelVonKrumm · 07/07/2025 19:40

Its Italian cousin is vaffanculo (literally "go to arse")

Show quote history

I may have to remember that.

TheAutumnCrow · 07/07/2025 20:16

I think that there are helpful alternatives to the ghastly phrase ‘use your words’, which could be offered to the supposed ‘wet lettuces’ who presumably have some stuff going on.

‘Do you need some ideas about how to raise the subject with her?’

‘Is it hard for you to talk to him for a specific reason?’

‘Are there particular reasons why you haven’t spoken to them about it yet?’

Zov · 07/07/2025 20:16

KateDelRick · 07/07/2025 19:33

Oh yes! So irritating. "Well, I would have spoken to them, but that's just me. You do you ".

Show quote history

😆 YES. Exactly!

LondonFox · 07/07/2025 20:15

partyetiquette · 07/07/2025 17:34

Nope they deserve to be told in an adult way

Show quote history

Tbh in most cases posts go like:
"I am married to 20 years, helped my DH in every way, raised kids while working ft and catered for his every wish.
Also, he cannot remember my birthday so I feel a bit sad."
MN: "use your BIG GIRL words"

Like for what?
To tell capable adult to use his fucking brain?

You would expect people to get to know you in a relationship without you listing every single step they need to do.
Just imagine world where women wait for men to tell them every day a full list of detailed instructions in order lol

BunnyLake · 07/07/2025 20:13

Blurrywateryeye · 07/07/2025 20:08

Can you not have a civil debate without leading to a confrontation?

Show quote history

I personally don’t like confrontation but some posters seem unable to ever voice their likes or dislikes or what they won’t tolerate even to their (non abusive) spouses or children.

Blurrywateryeye · 07/07/2025 20:08

nomas · 07/07/2025 20:02

They’re not wrong though.

Too many MNers hate confrontation or are wet lettuces.

Show quote history

Can you not have a civil debate without leading to a confrontation?

BunnyLake · 07/07/2025 20:07

nomas · 07/07/2025 20:02

They’re not wrong though.

Too many MNers hate confrontation or are wet lettuces.

Show quote history

The amount of wet lettuces on MN boggles my mind, how do they get through the day?

BunnyLake · 07/07/2025 20:05

Namechangerage · 07/07/2025 19:52

But why not say “Talk to them” instead of “use your words”?! It’s so ridiculously twattish.

Show quote history

I swear there are phrases and words on MN I never hear in real life. And don’t even get me started on ‘vanishingly’ - that word cannot (and should not) exist outside MN. Never heard it said in real life.

nomas · 07/07/2025 20:05

NeverDropYourMooncup · 07/07/2025 17:41

It's used in an ableist way at neurodiverse adults (and by extension, is an ableist insult to direct at a neurotypical person). So they can fuck right off.

No one on MN knows who is ND and who isn’t, unless they say they are.

Bebee1 · 07/07/2025 20:03

Agree. Very annoying.

Almost as annoying as: “Are you always this anxious?” Or “What did he say when you told him?”

So passive aggressive.

nomas · 07/07/2025 20:02

partyetiquette · 07/07/2025 16:51

Directed at the twats on here who patronisingly say it to posters
"Why did you not use your words"
"Use your words"
Use my foot up your arse you patronising twat

They’re not wrong though.

Too many MNers hate confrontation or are wet lettuces.

BunnyLake · 07/07/2025 20:02

Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g · 07/07/2025 19:05

Gently, OP ...
Gentle reminder ...
I was today years old when I learned ...
Forever home
Hubby

Hate all these.

Today year’s old gives me the red mist. No one ever said that year’s ago, who dreamt it up 😡

FlayOtters · 07/07/2025 19:57

TheAutumnCrow · 07/07/2025 19:56

‘Go fuck yourself’ works as a loose paraphrase

Show quote history

this I understand and enjoy using 😀

TheAutumnCrow · 07/07/2025 19:56

FlayOtters · 07/07/2025 19:29

oh my god this, I have always hated/been so confused by "get to fuck" - what does it mean???

Show quote history

‘Go fuck yourself’ works as a loose paraphrase

Namechangerage · 07/07/2025 19:52

whitewineandsun · 07/07/2025 19:50

It's annoying, but honestly, so many posters on here seem incapable of having a conversation with the person they've decided to marry/cohabitate/have children with. It's baffling. No one is a mind reader.

But why not say “Talk to them” instead of “use your words”?! It’s so ridiculously twattish.

TheAutumnCrow · 07/07/2025 19:51

WearyAuldWumman · 07/07/2025 19:12

I've never thought of that before.

I've previously found myself in situations where I've not spoken up because the situation was so obvious (to me) that speaking up seemed futile.

Show quote history

I think a some posters learned the hard way when they were growing up that ‘speaking up’ meant getting a slap, whether it be from a parent, sibling, teacher or other adult (yes really, we’re not all Gen Xers from England).

Anyway the OP made me smile. So there’s that. I agree about the language being patronising and unhelpful.

Namechangerage · 07/07/2025 19:51

OP, I love you!!! 🤟

whitewineandsun · 07/07/2025 19:50

It's annoying, but honestly, so many posters on here seem incapable of having a conversation with the person they've decided to marry/cohabitate/have children with. It's baffling. No one is a mind reader.

SchnizelVonKrumm · 07/07/2025 19:42

TheOtherAgentJohnson · 07/07/2025 17:56

Infantile language is de rigueur these days.

Use your words
Forever home
Abroad holiday

I picture these people performatively eating their food with their hands, splaying their fingers as if they don’t have full motor control like a toddler, imagining it looks winsome.

Then they curl up on the sofa with a good book, holding their giant mug of hot chocolate with both toddlery paws.

All before taking their fur baby to foggy day care

SchnizelVonKrumm · 07/07/2025 19:40

Zov · 07/07/2025 18:51

It's pretty Northern English/Scottish. Just means 'fuck off' basically.

Show quote history

Its Italian cousin is vaffanculo (literally "go to arse")

KateDelRick · 07/07/2025 19:33

Zov · 07/07/2025 19:30

Or even worse, when someone complains about (eg) a neighbour smoking outside the lounge window, that's only 8 feet away from the OPs, and someone says 'what did they say when you spoke to them about it?' 🙄 (Knowing full well the OP hasn't said anything.) Really fucking condescending.

Show quote history

Oh yes! So irritating. "Well, I would have spoken to them, but that's just me. You do you ".

Zov · 07/07/2025 19:30

AngelicKaty · 07/07/2025 19:19

I agree. It is patronising and is the sort of phrase that should be reserved for young children. If an adult is having a communication problem with someone, it's far better (and more age-appropriate!) to say "Have you spoken to them about it?"
Which has reminded me that I should start a thread about the twats who use the phrase "reached out to them" (instead of "contacted them" or "spoke to them") - WTAF?!!! 😡

Show quote history

Or even worse, when someone complains about (eg) a neighbour smoking outside the lounge window, that's only 8 feet away from the OPs, and someone says 'what did they say when you spoke to them about it?' 🙄 (Knowing full well the OP hasn't said anything.) Really fucking condescending.

Wellwater · 07/07/2025 19:30

partyetiquette · 07/07/2025 16:58

It's the phrase "use your words" it's designed for children , you could say to another adult
"Why don't you have a conversation"
Or
"Listen mate, just fucking tell him"

Use your words is infantilising

Show quote history

But it’s intended to imply the person not Using Their Words is not behaving like an adult.

FlayOtters · 07/07/2025 19:29

WonderingWanda · 07/07/2025 17:15

Well I do agree that "Use your words" is a bollocms phrase whether used at adults or children....it's so condescending. I always told my kids to "Speak properly" or "Speak up for yourself".

However, I have to confess I hate the expression "Get to fuck" I love a good swear but this makes no fucking sense whatsoever. Where is fuck and why do I need to get there?

oh my god this, I have always hated/been so confused by "get to fuck" - what does it mean???

Fargo79 · 07/07/2025 19:27

It's sarcasm. People use it to make the point that the OP is behaving like a small child. Calling them out for "infantilising" people is pointless because that's the intention.