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AIBU?

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Original poster

To ask DH to no go away for weekend

206 replies

Pt4ever · 07/07/2025 10:50

Hello,

I'll keep it brief.

DH is going away to an event in a few weeks for a night away I've no interest in the event (airshow 🙄🥱🥱) he went last year and had another weekend away doing something else in the winter of 2024

We've one DS who he's arranged childcare for with ho parents and worked overtime to pay for all travel/ hotel and tickets. I just feel like I don't really get a chance to go away for my hobbies, he's always said I can go away and we can afford it but it feels weird me up and going away for the weekend.

To ask him not to go? How would I explain it?

OP posts:
diterictur · 07/07/2025 10:55

How old is your DS? Why do you need help from grandparents to look after one child? Is there any additional context like you being disabled or the child having additional needs?

If there's nothing more to it, sorry I think you're being ridiculous. Going away a couple of weekends a year is nothing. It's normal and healthy to spend time away pursuing your own interests.

It's unreasonable to whinge about wanting to do it yourself when he has said you can..

PullingOutHair123 · 07/07/2025 10:54

Unless there is a lot more to this, you are being totally unreasonable.

2 weekends away in a year does not seem unreasonable, and you could go away if you wanted to - you are just choosing not to for some reason.

He has even organised child care, although unclear why you couldn't manage for a weekend?

19lottie82 · 07/07/2025 10:54

YABVVU. Let him go and then you are owed a night away doing something that you want to do. Why should he never get to do anything he wants because “you feel weird” about going away for the weekend?

if this was the other way around he would be called controlling.

Icanttakethisanymore · 07/07/2025 10:53

I wouldn't ask him not to go because you can't explain it without sounding very unreasonable IMO. You don't want to go away so he can't either... is basically what you are saying. That's unreasonable.

itsobviousright · 07/07/2025 10:53

Why don't you want him to go? Because you feel weird going away even though hes supportive and keen for you to do so? You are being very unreasonable - he's sorted childcare and worked extra so he's not using family funds for his trip - that's great of him. Wave him off happily and sit with some self reflection - maybe you need to widen your horizons and find you again

rubyslippers · 07/07/2025 10:53

You’re being totally unreasonable
You need to work out why YOU don’t want time away for your hobbies and so want to curtail your DH’s
he’s paid for it, sorted childcare - why don’t you do something for yourself that weekend?