To not want to give up masturbation?

Not only is this controlling to the extreme it demonstrates that he does not understand how a woman “works”. One is about the sharing of bodies, the other about relief, release and satisfaction.

Regardless of who else l am seeing in life, l usually masturbate once or twice a day. Often first thing in the morning (just have), when the last thing l would want, would be to put the effort in for 1:1 sex. The needs are totally different. At the end of the day you know your own body better than anyone else.

This is a big one for him to get started on, but it will be something else next. Beware!

I'm happily married to my husband of 20 years and we have an AWESOME sex life, with a lot of sex.

I masturbate daily.

I wouldn't quit masturbation, if it didn't have an impact on my sex life.

It might also be his way of getting sex on demand from you. If he wants sex and you say you’re not in the mood he accuses you of having masturbated so then you start agreeing to sex every time he initiates to ‘prove’ you haven’t and avoid the inevitable unpleasant argument ensuing. Very sinister indeed!

Just laugh at him. He needs to get over himself. Don’t take something so ridiculous so seriously.

Without wanting to override a man’s opinion on male function, actually there are men who don’t wank very much or at all if they’re in a relationship.

I’m finding the 6 hearts thing a bit odd but if you find it helpful ok…

You're the one getting obsessive over arguing with me on this thread!

Again - other people have different opinions to you!

OP, you are extremely naive if you think that any man doesn't masturbate.

Of course he does. A lot of men do it in the shower, even on a break at work - I can tell you with 100% certainty that he does.

It's irrelevant really though because neither of you should be trying to control/ dictate what the other does with their own body. He sounds immature.

I voted YABU as meant I thought you unreasonable to be considering giving it up. He sounds very insecure and this is a relatively new relationship so what else will he stay dictating you give up.... could be the start of something more sinister.

Why on earth do you tell him? I would think most men would take it as a compliment because, presumably, you are thinking about, and inspired by, him while doing that. It means you want more of him.

Men crack one out in 2 mins in the bathroom.
.doesn't matter if he is or isn't. Just laugh if he brings it up and ask him why he thinks he can control your body even when he's not there. I think it is sinister

Bet he does it in the shower

Targeted? Oh, come off it! 😂😂. There literally is no other sensible advice to give to someone whose new boyfriend thinks they’ve got a right to dictate if they can masturbate or not. I mean, what do you think will come of her not telling him and carrying on? He’ll either find out somehow and get nasty or he won’t find out but she’ll still be in a relationship with him where he gets to control even more aspects of her life.

My bet will be that he becomes obsessive over it. He will start accusing her every time he can’t get hold of her when she naps. He’ll start looking for evidence of sex toys or staining on bedsheets and accusing her, using any excuse or supposed evidence as a reason to start an argument over it. That’s what they do.

Massive red flag. End this relationship now, or this is just the start of his demands. How dare he tell you what you can and can’t do with your own body.

Why 5? Why waste more of your life waiting for this loser to be more of who he is?

This level of oversharing in relationships is always going to lead to trouble. I've been married 15 years and I can't imagine my husband telling me when he's had a wank. It'd give me the ick 'cos I'd wonder why the h he was telling me. Mabye that's the problem your boyfriend has. Did he actually ask you? Or why does he even know?

Ah, and it's another first time poster. Of course it is. However did I guess? Okay, I'll play.

Unless you are wanking noisily and merrily right next to him while he's awake and lying there feeling like an uninvited guest to the party, I can't see why he even needs to know about this or why it would ever come up in conversation.

What else am I expecting? To be able to give my opinion on OPs dilemma for one thing without being targeted by you.

Not everyone has to agree with you - you're as bad as OPs boyfriend if you think they do.

She knows what he’s doing is wrong somewhere deep down else she wouldn’t have posted on here in the first place. It’s a new relationship and he already feels he can tell her what she can and can’t do and get pissed off when she has naps. Wtf!! It’s a new relationship so she needs to get rid of him before she gets more attached and makes it harder for herself.

Some people need everyone to say dump him so they can get some perspective, especially if they’ve been in abusive relationships previously and can’t see the wood for the trees or are very young.

There is no other sensible advice to give other than dump!! What else are you expecting? She should not have to keep things secret in case her abusive boyfriend gets angry over a normal adult human behaviour.

People are always quick to say Dump Him on MN but OP may not feel ready to dump him yet or would have done so rather than posting on MN.

No doubt this has put her off him somewhat but she is not ready to dump him just yet so I was being pragmatic.

Never mind don’t tell him - that suggests she’s doing something wrong and needs to keep it a secret so he won’t break up with her. She should find some self respect and dump his sorry controlling arse quicker than he can even say masturbation.

She is the owner of her own body and she can bloody well do what she likes without his permission. The very fact he feels he has the right to give her that permission is a massive cheek and I felt angry when I read it at the thought of any partner of mine dictating to me like that!

Yep. He's lying, so he makes OP think shes his sole sexual outlet, and he is hers. Which leads to coercion. If she doesn't want to, he'll complain he has blue balls and "needs" it. And of course, that she must be lying to him and wanking on the side, or cheating.

Edited as I thought about it a bit more!

He's being unreasonable.

Just do it and don't tell him - sorted.

This is enough of a reason to break up with him op, you don't need to play some weird relationship hangman, and that's too many chances to give him - dump him

This is absolutely insane.

You don't need permission to touch your own body.

You need to be firm say it’s your body and you won’t be questioned or dictated to about it . If h can’t accept it then this is not the right relationship. No one should feel they have the right to control you.