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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To feel like I'm not sure where I sit politically anymore, and to worry about it.

292 replies

Lookuptotheskies · 06/07/2025 23:00

I've always been a staunch Labour voter. Always been pro refugees. Always given people the benefit of the doubt. Always felt okay that I've brought innocent kids into the world.

Labour are making cuts to disability benefits (and in turn, carer benefits). They are looking to slash sen support in schools.

My town is being overtaken with overt criminal activity. Illegal cigarettes, money laundering business, violent crime on the increase, known drug dealers, fly tipping, etc. Nothing is done. It's just a never ending thing, they bust one and another pops up.

I've always fought against the tide of racist idiots, using politics as an excuse for violent riots. I live in a multi-cutural town, chose a very multicultural school for my kids. But I can't continue to argue with the people pointing out the rise in crimes, drugs, exploitation etc which is very visibily linked to immigration. I feel so uneasy about acknowledging how I feel about this! Guilty and a bit embarrassed. I've always been live and let live, whereas now I feel more protective, more cynical, less tolerant.

I am also gender critical and very much in favour of single sex spaces, based on biological sex. This has been a slow thing too. I've witnessed the language around women changing (cervix owner, pregnant person, chest feeding etc). I've witnessed our spaces and groups being invaded by biological men (I don't want a man on the other side of the curtain to me in a women's hospital ward, or a bra changing cubicle, or a swimming changing room.

Does anyone else feel like they are completely re-evaluating what they accept/don't accept, and what they stand for politically?

I don't currently feel there is any one political party that aligns with my ideals.

I may or may not get completely flamed, but I'm curious on other's thoughts. I will check back intermittently but I don't live on my phone/mumsnet.

This is not a troll post. I've been a mn user for over 18 years.

OP posts:
Crumpet727 · 07/07/2025 06:43

HarkerandBarker · 07/07/2025 06:39

That's the point. Most people can't afford it. The question is why?

Because most people don’t pay enough tax meaning there aren’t sufficient public funds to ensure that most areas are nice places to live in.

HarkerandBarker · 07/07/2025 06:41

Am I the only idiot that reads through the thread before replying? It's like we are talking in parallel universes on here.

HarkerandBarker · 07/07/2025 06:39

Crumpet727 · 07/07/2025 06:37

There are plenty of wonderful places to live in the UK if you can afford them.

It is quite possible to exist with virtually no first hand experience of pretty much all of the societal issues that exist.

You shouldn’t have to do that but the grossly differing standard of areas means you have little choice if you want the best for your children.

That's the point. Most people can't afford it. The question is why?

iamnowslim · 07/07/2025 06:38

Are you me Op? I feel exactly the same. Talking politics makes me so uneasy atm. Im
a carer and disability benifits keeps our family afloat so I do need to keep abreast of things.
if there were a GE tomorrow I would not know how to vote

Crumpet727 · 07/07/2025 06:37

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

There are plenty of wonderful places to live in the UK if you can afford them.

It is quite possible to exist with virtually no first hand experience of pretty much all of the societal issues that exist.

You shouldn’t have to do that but the grossly differing standard of areas means you have little choice if you want the best for your children.

cariadlet · 07/07/2025 06:33

I've always been left wing and still am but am more nuanced than when I was young.

I'm pro women's rights including women's sex based rights. In the UK, the fight back against trans demands has been led by left wing feminists. Just because many on the right agree that sex is immutable, doesn't mean that it's a right wing position.

As far as immigration is concerned, I think that overall it's a good thing and I believe that we should be welcoming to genuine refugees and asylum seekers.

But I don't believe in uncontrolled immigration, I think that the assessment process needs to be speeded up and I think that asylum seekers should be allowed to work (which most of them want to). I'm also concerned about some groups of immigrants who import all of their values and seem to want to live in segregated lives. That's not racist - groups like the Ugandan Asians who came over to the UK after being expelled by Idi Amin managed to keep their religion etc but also contribute very positively to UK society. Some more recent immigrants have attitudes which are more negative, particular towards women and girls.

There has been a huge rise in anti social behaviour over recent years and police do nothing about some crimes (the recent shoplifting thread was an eye-opener), possibly because there aren't enough of them. Some anti-social behaviour and crime is down to recent immigrants but much is also down to British people. Drugs and poverty (I know that poor people are disproportionately likely to be victims of crime and that a lot of crime is carried out by people who are far from poor, but it does play a part) are often involved and the political decision taken by Cameron to impose austerity and dismantle programmes like Sure Start all have a role to play in the rise of crime and anti-social behaviour.

HarkerandBarker · 07/07/2025 06:32

CurlewKate · 07/07/2025 06:29

Somebody described voting as like a bus ride. You pick the bus that gets you nearest to where you want to be- you can’t expect it to take you straight to the door. For me, that’s still Labour.

Have yiu read anybody else's reply I wonder 🤔

Crumpet727 · 07/07/2025 06:32

Labour being in government has yet again showed up those with left wing tendencies to be incredibly naive.

People want everything without paying much for it. Lower/mid range earners think they are already taxed a lot when in fact the opposite is true when based on other western economies.

On top of this we’re now in a society where a relatively small number of people are funding everyone else. Based on government data, any individual earning under 70k is a drain on public finances. A single earner in a couple with no children needs to earn 115k for the couple to be net contributors.

Society works when everyone feels they are paying their fair share and receiving fair return whether that be through necessary financial support or through provision of excellent public services and a safe environment. That doesn’t happen at the moment and the balance is getting steadily worse.

We now have a situation where huge numbers take what they can and the net contributors typically pay to avoid the social issues. If you’ve ever been to places such as South Africa you’ll know exactly where things are headed.

As Margaret Thatcher said “there’s no such thing as society, there are only men and women and families”. I think there is a lot of truth in that.

HarkerandBarker · 07/07/2025 06:31

Jewel1968 · 07/07/2025 06:08

Why do you think there are high levels of immigration? Think about it. What do you think might have happened in their countries that would result in people leaving their homes?

I think the political system is problematic. We probably need a radical overhaul but who is going to do that? Do we even understand how it really works now? Who influences our politicians?

Perhaps get involved in politics? Dunno what the answer is but I don't think another party is the answer.

Since Tony Blair came into power the flood gates opened.

You should find out why that happened and then you will know why so many people come here.

They're mostly economic migrants who are able to claim benefits.

Legal and illegal.

CurlewKate · 07/07/2025 06:29

Somebody described voting as like a bus ride. You pick the bus that gets you nearest to where you want to be- you can’t expect it to take you straight to the door. For me, that’s still Labour.

Champagneandpringles24 · 07/07/2025 06:18

Labour do not prioritise it's own people. They take off the elderly who've paid into this country their whole lives, Starmer was also happy to take off disabled people but has no problem spending 8 MILLION POUNDS A DAY ON ILLEGALS.

The man cannot stop a rubber dingy let alone run a County. The man is a spineless cretin!!

Britain is no longer a safe country to live in. The streets are no longer safe for women and children.

Labour need to go and we need a leader with a backbone who isn't afraid to speak up and put their people first. We need change so for me, I will 100% be voting reform and I am not ashamed to say it.

User37482 · 07/07/2025 06:18

I think there is an increasing trend of the police managing law abiding people and not the violent. You see it on womens rights events, the transrights activists are often aggressive and violent yet it is the women who will be policed. The grooming gangs thing, little girls ended up with convictions whilst the men abusing them walked free.

I think it’s easier for the police tbh and I think a lot of well meaning anti-racism has tipped into trying to avoid acknowledging bad behaviour on the part of minorities. Even the panicky denials that some people claiming asylum are economic migrants, it’s clearly ridiculous. I say this as a minority who also doesn’t like crime and wants to live in a nice place thats pleasant, clean and safe.

Jewel1968 · 07/07/2025 06:08

Why do you think there are high levels of immigration? Think about it. What do you think might have happened in their countries that would result in people leaving their homes?

I think the political system is problematic. We probably need a radical overhaul but who is going to do that? Do we even understand how it really works now? Who influences our politicians?

Perhaps get involved in politics? Dunno what the answer is but I don't think another party is the answer.

HarkerandBarker · 07/07/2025 06:03

TizerorFizz · 06/07/2025 23:27

It’s unfair to say poorer people commit all the crime and make places not pleasant to live in. It’s criminal people who do that. Criminal. The people who do the exploiting are rarely poor. The question is: why don’t we have a police force that will do anything about it? Why have they stood by and let young girls be raped. I think I’m reasonably tolerant but a crime is a crime whoever commits it. Politics doesn’t come into it if the police turn a blind eye. No one meets what I would like to see either. Labour taxes business and expects to see growth! Economical literate. Everyone should be aware you cannot have a vast welfare state without business doing well. Employees and business owners pay for it. No government can expect growth if they keep taxing more and more and disincentivize saving.

What is the incentive for well off people to commit crime? Or the type of crimes, should I say, that are affecting every day life for many communities. Of course poverty is the largest contributer to crime. Nobody says every poor person is a criminal.

MathNotMathing · 07/07/2025 06:01

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

HarkerandBarker · 07/07/2025 05:58

corlan · 06/07/2025 23:12

I have the same feeling of guilt and embarrassment about my feelings about immigration. Have always considered myself left wing. I am the daughter of immigrants. Yet, I can't help feeling sad about the way my home town has changed for the worse. Ironically, this happened under the Conservative government but I don't trust Labour to do much about it and would never vote Reform!

Never say never. We still have four more years of Labour

HarkerandBarker · 07/07/2025 05:55

Does anyone know that Keir was a human rights lawyer? Then he became the Head of CPS?
He took Blair's government to court to give illegal immigrants the right to claim benefits.

So how can he have a firm stance on immigration? What he fought to put in place he has to now try to dismantle?

Illegal Immigration in this country is the beast made between him and the European Human Rights Law.

Another reason, I believe he did not want an investigation ino the grooming gangs is not so much that he was appeasing a certain demographic but he was the one who got pdf Jimmy Saville off saying that there was insufficient evidence to prosecute which was unlikely. The fact is Jimmy (another Sir) Saville was already deceased.

He's an absolute hypocritic. This is why I believe he flip flops so much because his head is always battling with his conscience.

I'm sure he doesn't even know who is anymore. How can he? But more importantly how can we?

PeggyMitchellsCameo · 07/07/2025 05:35

spoonbillstretford · 07/07/2025 01:28

I'll always be left wing liberal and no party has ever been left enough for me since John Smith died. I've voted Labour, Lib Dem and Green and will never, ever vote Conservative or Reform.

John Smith. What a loss he was. Being idealistic in the 90’s I was swept up in New Labour, it felt like such a hopeful time. While they did make some decent decisions, and made progress in Northern Ireland, some of their actions around the NHS and the war in Iraq - not so good. And they obviously encouraged huge inflows of Russian cash into London, which raised its own issues and the financial crash didn’t help either.
I don’t think Cameron’s austerity policies ever left us. I heard Mick Lynch speak last year and he said we still live under the blanket of Thatcherism, where the individual is key.
I am a centrist, usually left-leaning. My background is in economics, and so that is why my thoughts go to first. My heart wants to help everyone, but my head knows it’s unsustainable.
I struggle with the trans movement in terms of its erosion of women’s rights.
My city is a swathe of vape shops. Independent stores are a thing of the past. I do understand concerns about boat crossings. The recent scandal of grooming gangs, which is actually a long history of abuse of young girls, is a concern. The fact that the perpetrators are walking free, the ones who have left prison, is a worry.
Full prisons are also a concern.
I am disabled and the current narrative around benefits has left me not sleeping. And I do know a few people who are circumventing the system.
I have no desire to follow Corbyn’s new party.
I feel sickened by the rise in anti-semitism. But I also understand the fury over the treatment of the citizens of Gaza. There is a huge difference between taking out Hamas leaders and shooting at innocent, starving people in a food queue.
The people of Ukraine seem to have been forgotten. People in the Post Office scandal are still waiting for compensation, and those who plundered state funds for their own ends seemingly got away with it.
The area where I live is a Labour stronghold, but I know people who are turning to Reform.
All I have are questions with no answers.

HarkerandBarker · 07/07/2025 05:33

OlympicProcrastinator · 07/07/2025 04:54

I completely get this. I don’t think I’ll vote again. At least not for a while. What is the point? Not one party does what they say they’ll do. They lie, make promises they break. They right wing act like left wing then they left act right. Neither Labour or cons represent me and I’d never vote reform so I’m just going to get on with life and hope for the best as I no longer feel my contribution to the vote matters at all.

Yes bury your head in the sand 😂

Bluehydra · 07/07/2025 05:33

I agree and think to myself that if this is how I’m beginning to feel, god knows how other folks are feeling. The tories and Labour Party are handing what’s left of our country to Reform and that just can’t be the answer.

I’ve voted Labour all of my life. But my town is becoming unrecognisable and unsafe. I don’t feel comfortable walking alone myself anymore and my DH sits in the car and watches me while I run round the park. I think we have been bonkers to think that people from third world countries will arrive on our shores and magically rid themselves of third world views (it’s so unrealistic). You’re talking about men coming from countries where women are attacked and killed for things like honour and shame and then expecting them to treat western women differently.

HarkerandBarker · 07/07/2025 05:32

doodleschnoodle · 07/07/2025 05:12

The conversation around immigration has been stifled for so long because voicing any anti-immigration sentiment, no matter how nuanced has automatically = racism. Except now we are in a situation where it’s clear that immigration is an issue, and Reform are now rubbing their hands with glee as so many people have been pushed towards them because the bigger parties have sleepwalked their way into this and are only now realising that something does need to be done.

I think the vast majority of people are pro-immigration in many, even most, circumstances, but we have to acknowledge we have a problem with economic migration, which manifests in high numbers of unskilled young men, who tend to be higher risk in terms of criminal activity, and certain cultural sort of pockets with communities who are not interested in integrating or contributing to the country particularly. Branding the above as racist is how Reform have now got such a big following. People who ordinarily would have been pretty core Labour voters have been pushed towards the other side by the long-running refusal to acknowledge the problems around immigration.

I agree with you, OP, I have been what I would call left wing, a pretty staunch Labour voter my whole life. Now? I’ve no idea. I won’t vote Reform but I also don’t feel the kind of fear about them I might have 10 years ago.

Edited

Vote with who you want. If you want to vote reform then vote for them.

savagedaughter · 07/07/2025 05:29

People have been trying to say this for years, but have been branded fascists and right wing nutters, hateful, phobic and bigots. It's actually been obvious for some time And yeah I used to vote left wing, my whole life, stopped around 5 years ago when I saw what way the wind was blowing. Obviously, couldn't vote Tory at that time either. Mumsnetters have been screaming LIAR LIAR LIAR BIGOT BIGOT BIGOT for years every time I stated I was always a left wing voter who changed my beliefs given the information available.

The two parties are not actually very far apart at all, neither cares much at all about the people of the UK, both are fine with mass immigration, and all the other globalist stuff people have been trying to warn about for years.

It's too late tbh, the UK is in a dowward spiral and its not coming back from it.

HarkerandBarker · 07/07/2025 05:26

Morningsleepin · 07/07/2025 04:52

So the crime is totally down to the immigrants? Do you mean recent immigrants or people whose families arrives within thee last 80 years? Did your children make friends with any immigrants in their school?

I'm first generation here. Nobody is saying all immigration is responsible for crime. I believe the sentiment is that its poverty that is the driving factor. It was a case of demand and supply but now it's supply and demand. It's totally unsustainable. Read my earlier post before you call me a racist. I know many convicted criminals and all of them come from disadvantaged backgrounds. Why don't you look at the prison statistics? No point in being defensive about facts. Whether someone has been friends with immigrants or not is neither here nor there right now considering the state of everything in this country.

doodleschnoodle · 07/07/2025 05:12

The conversation around immigration has been stifled for so long because voicing any anti-immigration sentiment, no matter how nuanced has automatically = racism. Except now we are in a situation where it’s clear that immigration is an issue, and Reform are now rubbing their hands with glee as so many people have been pushed towards them because the bigger parties have sleepwalked their way into this and are only now realising that something does need to be done.

I think the vast majority of people are pro-immigration in many, even most, circumstances, but we have to acknowledge we have a problem with economic migration, which manifests in high numbers of unskilled young men, who tend to be higher risk in terms of criminal activity, and certain cultural sort of pockets with communities who are not interested in integrating or contributing to the country particularly. Branding the above as racist is how Reform have now got such a big following. People who ordinarily would have been pretty core Labour voters have been pushed towards the other side by the long-running refusal to acknowledge the problems around immigration.

I agree with you, OP, I have been what I would call left wing, a pretty staunch Labour voter my whole life. Now? I’ve no idea. I won’t vote Reform but I also don’t feel the kind of fear about them I might have 10 years ago.

OlympicProcrastinator · 07/07/2025 04:54

I completely get this. I don’t think I’ll vote again. At least not for a while. What is the point? Not one party does what they say they’ll do. They lie, make promises they break. They right wing act like left wing then they left act right. Neither Labour or cons represent me and I’d never vote reform so I’m just going to get on with life and hope for the best as I no longer feel my contribution to the vote matters at all.

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