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Is it cheeky to ask our carpenter friend for referral discount?

62 replies

outlanderish · 06/07/2025 11:45

We've passed our carpenters details to quite a few people and we are the first people to really use him and spend lots of money with him (9k) since he's gone off on his own. He's a long term friend of mine... and I'm wondering if it would be cheeky to ask if we can get a referral discount if we keep recommending him to other people... he also doesn't really ever say thank you when I say I've passed his details on to other people, which annoys me.

OP posts:
ComtesseDeSpair · 06/07/2025 12:04

Presumably you recommend him because he’s good and you want the people you recommend him to, who you know and like, to have good work done. Wanting to turn it into a money-making exercise for yourself is frankly weird; and expecting loads of profuse thanks is also a bit weird: he’s good at his job, he takes pride in his work, he probably has most of his customers telling him that they’ve recommended him.

DiscoBob · 06/07/2025 12:02

Don't be silly. If he wanted to give you a mates rates discount he would already be doing so.
You recommended him because he was good.

Do you know who of your friends used him, how much money they spent and whether they're fully satisfied? Just be happy you've got a decent tradesman.

Boddica2000 · 06/07/2025 11:54

I am cringing at the mere thought of you doing this and have secondhand embarrassment for you for even asking this. Yes it's unreasonable.

Just don't refer him if you think he's not grovellingly thankful enough.

SaturdayDream · 06/07/2025 11:54

Yes it’s cheeky. Trades are struggling so support them without asking for money off.

PIayer456 · 06/07/2025 11:53

Yes.

Some people’s thought processes really do confuse me.

Surely wanting to profit from a friend is not normal?

Benefitbettyquestion · 06/07/2025 11:53

Weird that you think you deserve a fee.

NoWomanNoBuy · 06/07/2025 11:52

If it bothers you that he doesn't thank you, you could always stop recommending him. It's really not like you're doing him an extra special favour since generally builders/tradesmen do most of their work on referrals/recommendations. Plus it doesn't cost you anything except literally one minute of time and effort so I'm really not sure why you think he should be reciprocate in financial terms??

Trumptonagain · 06/07/2025 11:52

Yes.

RedBeech · 06/07/2025 11:50

Please don't. I work freelance and 90% of my work is word of mouth recommendations from previous clients because I am good at what I do and take huge pride in it. If word got around that they got a referral fee or discount, new clients might be more mistrustful of the reasons for the referral

I refer good people all the time and rely on recommendations from friends too.

NoWomanNoBuy · 06/07/2025 11:49

Yes that's very cheeky. He deserves to get paid what his time is worth!

UnsocialMedia · 06/07/2025 11:47

He maybe doesn't think too much of it because word of mouth is how the majority of tradespeople get work. It would be nice if the next time he did work for you he gave you a good deal, but I think a more formal referral discount (how are you thinking it would work?) would be a bit weird to negotiate with a friend.

BitOutOfPractice · 06/07/2025 11:46

Yes it would.