To think “neurodivergent” is being used too casually and too often?

Other ND children aren't the problem. The problem is massive underfunding in every area that affects ND children leading to years long waiting lists. You're directing your anger at the wrong people, but i guess berating other ND children and parents on mumsnet is an easier target than lobbying the government for change.

I'm also confused as to how this other woman is taking up space on a waiting list if as you've said, she hasn't been to the GP. That's how you get on the waiting list. So she can't be both taking up space on a waiting list and also never have been to the GP.

While you're writing to your MP to lobby for help for more healthcare for ND children, id suggest you get your son on the right to choose pathway.

Also - who are you to decide all these other people aren't ND but your kid is?

1% of children have an autism diagnosis, 5% adhd. “Neurodiversity” isn’t a diagnosis it’s an internet catch all phrase.

Have you considered that people may mention it because they are hoping to be treated with a little understanding rather than being treated like shit for being different?

It is outrageous that anyone should feel they need to disclose their medical information for a chance of being treated with thoughtfulness but sadly NT people are not generally known for their willingness to embrace ND.

If youre not disabled you're fine, if you're disabled enough you get the pity, the bless you's, the tick box inclusion and the performative compassion but if you're in the 'not nt enough not nd enough' section then you can either tell people your struggles or you can get laughed at, sneered at, bullied and ostracised.

My younger son is much more severely autistic than my older son. He gets more understanding from strangers than my older son, who is autistic enough to be seen as weird and be rejected but not autistic enough for the NTs to get themselves some kindness stickers on their inclusion star chart.

I dont blame any autistic person for doing what they need to do to get by.

15% @L1ghyn1ngBug
Raising Teens: Neurodiversity | Make Good Trouble

Because they are screened beforehand.

i read it online @L1ghyn1ngBug
Are we becoming a more neurodiverse nation? - Options Autism

Says who,you? Who cares anyway. Neurodiversity isn’t a diagnosis. It’s an internet catch all phrase.

most of those on the waiting lists are diagnosed tbh

it is not just in this particular context,
i read on another thread, Tell me you know nothing about working for the NHS without telling me you don’t know what it’s like

ergh

do you actually speak to people like this?

I have to agree. My son is obviously neurodivergent (as told by health visitors, doctors he’s seen both at the gp and hospital, the school etc) but because hes been awaiting his diagnosis for 4 years now on the list - I say ‘suspected autism/adhd’. It’s ridiculous because I know someone who is all on the Facebook groups for autism and claims her daughter is autistic and plays on it, but she has NEVER took her even to the gp to seek help. She plasters her daughter with this medical condition but has never sought help for testing for a diagnosis.

Yet my poor son is only in part time school (even with an ehcp) because his needs are so severe and he attacks me and himself daily to the point where I have bald spots on my head, he also has vicious daily meltdowns which basically end up in panic attacks and he runs into roads on a daily basis. But hey, because everyone labels their child as neurodivergent and are blocking up the waiting lists, genuine people like my son can’t get a diagnosis .

20% of the population consider themselves neurodiverse.

When it is used as an excuse for bad behaviour and lack of boundaries then absolutely, I agree, yes!
Otherwise, I believe the diagnosis is beneficial to help understand the needs and challenges that individual may face in everyday life so they can receive the necessary support available if the so want it.

Oh bless.

It’s self perpetuating because no one is going to post on mn that their DC is bright, has lots of friends, always chosen for the best role in the school play -do you think they could be NT? ….mind you

As an autistic woman I do dislike how interchangeably “ND” is used for meaning a specific diagnosis. ND can mean many, many things. From Autism to Dyslexic to Downs Syndrome to Bipolar.

I hate when people use it as such a broad blanket term thinking it means only “on the spectrum”

it isnt just parents seeking the diagnosis, it is teachers, so many of them

Ah OK. I'm sorry, I think I misunderstood your original comment and pounced on you a bit. Apologies.

I do agree that businesses pay lip service, but IME they do this even when they specifically name the condition i.e. "autism friendly" which I always know straight away will not be inclusive of my autistic child because they are generally only catering to the same small handful of needs that only some autistic people have. Not that I begrudge those people having their needs met whatsoever, but I think it shows there's a lack of real engagement with disabled people to dig a bit deeper into more of the barriers to participation that they face.

adhd is not even considered until after the age of 6 also

Nope those are the stats. You can make your own up if you like.

perhaps it should be @L1ghyn1ngBug , instead of slamming people down with phrases like the one above.

Disclosure - I am awaiting an ADHD diagnosis. When I look back at my childhood and time at school, I can pinpoint quite a few people who were just thought to be odd or 'off' in some way and bullied horribly for it. I suspect ND would be diagnosed in at least a couple of those cases nowadays. Can you not see how valuable it would have been for those children to have a better understanding of why their brains work in a particular way, and why they might need additional help connecting with their peers? In some cases, understanding is literally life-changing, as it removes the shame and the need to constantly mask and life becomes far easier when you just accept yourself (and your difficulties and limitations).

In my case, it would have been helpful to understand how my brain works at an earlier age, as it might have led to me making different decisions in life. For instance, as a child and teenager, I was quite immature compared to my peers which led to some social difficulties (and exhaustion caused by masking quite a lot of the time). I've since learned that actually this is quite common in children with ADHD - it's not unusual for them to be a few years behind their peers socially. My first career choice was somewhat of a disaster as it was an office-based job that didn't provide a sufficient level of sensory input and required too much in the way of executive function. I spent years over-compensating by working all hours to keep on top of things and driving myself to exhaustion and burnout. The anxiety almost led to a burnout. If I had known how my brain worked (and that it wasn't just some issue with me that could be solved by trying harder), I would never have chosen to pursue a career like that and would have gone into a quite different field of work.

Not helpful to who? Helping the ignorant isn’t high on my priority list.

pretty sure it is more

unless i am mistaken, this is mumsnet.
not some autistic channel - please allow for ignorance

You've said it right there - it helps some people (actually millions of people) to reconcile and validate their experience of living with a ND condition.

so that being the case, anyone who gets fed up of people talking about Neurodiversity need to remind themselves that it isn't about them, they aren't the centre of the story and need to empathise with the struggles of other rather than doing an eyeroll.