To go back to work full time even though there’s no financial need

I won’t read the full thread but DH and I both have always worked full time since our kids were 6 months old. They are now 9 and 5 and neither of us feel we have missed out on anything, every year with them is special in its own way and whilst we remember babyhood and toddlerhood fondly we never feel a sense that 9 year old DS is any less special or interesting than 1 year old DS for example. We are who we are, and DC are well rounded, happy little kids, touch wood and both very proud of mum and dad.

We both work 4 days a week which I love.

DH's day off is my favourite day of the week - I just swan off to work without having to think about the kids, come home to dinner on the table, it is wonderful to have a day when I don't have to think about the kids at all.

I enjoy my day with them too but my favourite day is definitely that day..

We don’t need to both work full time but we do. We find work very fulfilling and both like making maximum money. Each to their own.

My two DDs are 11 and 14 and still need me after school. I work FT but from home and hate being unavailable to them. I am going to ask to drop hours. We don’t need FT pay but it’s nice to have but if I was in your position I would definitely do part time .

Both worked ft, could have worked pt but didn’t want to and glad I didn’t

💯 agree - if you can make part time work for a few years, it really is the best of both worlds

It’s incredibly better for income tax for both people to have a decent pension rather than one person with a much bigger pension since we’re all taxed as individuals.

I’ve worked a mixture of either 3 or 4 days per week since having my children. It’s great. 3 days left us a little stretched so 4 days was probably the best of both worlds, which is what I do now. But 3 days was best for work life balance!

Are you married and do you have shared finances? Those would be my main two considerations before deciding how many hours to do at work.

Edited to add: my DH also works 4 days per week too so neither of us takes a ‘big hit’.

Yes that's nice and idealistic. However if you have spent any time reading MN relationship board at all you will see it is full of women who have been absolutely financially fucked over when taking this approach🤷 worth bearing in mind how beneficial it can be to have your own money and pension

I wouldn't go back full time if you don't need to. I did 3 days when mine were little, have increased to 4 now they are a bit older.

I don't think you'll ever regret not working more and spending less time with the kids! If you can afford it that is.

You’ve definitely read different MN threads to me @Jennps ! Anyone struggling even slightly with a baby or toddler is frogmarched back to work, full time, immediately!

Asking this question on MN will only ever yield one type of answer. Work as little as possible not at all.

Thats why you get so many distressed threads on here from financially dependent women about welfare or partners or husbands. If you are not completely financially independent, then you should do whatever it takes to get there. If you have. A trust fund or inheritance which means you can be financially independent without the taxpayer or a man, the fine, work as little as you want.

Part time was best of both worlds for me. I found being at home with DD really hard mentally when she was young. She was an easy baby and toddler and just had no idea what to do most of the time, had few friends and found it all lonely and depressing tbh. I found a job that was part time and had training for a qualification included and it all worked out very well

Well, it is all about balance. Yes, the first 5 years are important. So are the first few years at primary where they adjust to the school system and set their attitude to learning. So is upper primary where they need to learn to organise themselves and self direct their learning.

then you’ve got the adjustment to secondary, exams, and endless friendship drama to navigate.

it’s all important, it all requires time. Your career and your personal financial security matter too.

The first 5 years really shapes their future.

Absolutely agree with you putting your children first - not for everyone but I applaud those who do

Why are the baby/toddler years 'special time'? Every aspect of your child's life is special. Babies and toddlers are generally boring.
Keep your NI contributions going, keep paying into your pension, access promotions. You will be grateful later on. Children only get more expensive. And tbh they need you more as they start school and there is a heck load of things to attend and be there for.

Part time with some flexibility over days and hours so that you can be about when they’re poorly, for school assemblies, sports day etc is perfect.

I do agree either some flexibility or pt is key but don’t underestimate the benefits of a flexible employer, especially if you can buy more annual leave or take unpaid leave.

few people consider going back ft or near ft, but using unpaid time off you’re entitled to ask for, to boost leave days

Why are you asking then? If it suits you, don't worry about others making choices which suit them

The advantage of being PT is it just gives you more hours in the week to move stuff around. If dc is ill on Tuesday but you can find childcare for Friday, you can make up the time. That's a lot harder if you are FT.

We used to have a lot less mat leave. I went back to work FT after 4.5 months. Had a good tiny nursery at first, then a larger nursery later.

I never regretted it. I have a great career & DD has had good role models from both parents. The only time I nearly lost it was when I did a rare school pick up and another mum suggested that I should take more care over my laundry as DD's school polo shirts looked dingey!

I would never compromise my career, but that's my choice. Other people may make different decisions, but I think people need to look beyond the early years and consider how they will feel in a few years time. If you are happy with how you think your future will look, go ahead and do what suits you.

This. You have to consider it all together. If you can avoid full time childcare imo you should. If you can’t avoid it, then obviously don’t feel bad and it will be fine (crappy system but not the parents fault).

MN tends to favour full time work but I think full time childcare is too much for preschool children, unpopular opinion but there it is. I would prefer to be FT but my kids wouldn’t.