To be annoyed none of my friends have come to my concerts?

Just because the choir is amateur doesn't mean they aren't good. I've seen a lot of amateur choirs/plays etc over the years and the standard is generally pretty high. That aside, OP says the ticket sales go to charity so if my very good friend was doing something for charity I would support them - not all the time but I'd certainly go once. It's hardly an unusual concept for friends to do that sort of thing for each other!

One of my oldest friends sings in a choir. l've never seen them because that sort of thing bores me to death, but if she actually asked me directly in person to go along rather than just sharing the date on facebook - then l would, because she's a friend. Otherwise, no - what's the point? You're just part of one crowd watching another crowd making noises you aren't enjoying!

My MIL is in an amateur choir and I’ve never gone to support her. Not because I don’t care, but because I have no interest whatsoever in classical coral music. I would be so bored.

I recently took my friend to a hospital appointment she was worried about. She had a camera up her nose to look in her throat and I held her hand the whole time because she was petrified.

If she asked me to watch her sing at a choir I'd tell her 'No thanks!'

Your friends don't owe you their free time - if I wanted to spend time with a friend I would go to a pub or restaurant not go and watch them doing something and not actually interacting with them. This is your hobby that you like to do because presumably it brings you pleasure, it's clearly just not your friends' cup of tea and not something they want to spend their time on.

Yep. This is all about you OP and not about your friends. You don’t care if they come and find it excruciating. It’s a box ticking exercise to show they are a “true” friend. Fuck that.

I can see @LaChanteusethat you are well into your choir, given your username. You think it’s bloody brilliant. Other people don’t. They don’t want to come. If you think that makes them bad friends, that’s on you.

(In retrospect the cowboy erotica was hilarious but not when trying to find supportive things to say about it)

Yes, this. It takes hours of your spare time to read a full-length book.

When you think of the millions of books out there, and how few of them most people will ever have time to read in their lifetimes, it's an awful lot to ask of somebody who hasn't really shown any interest. Maybe if you'd written a poem or something, but not an entire book.

Plus, the less interested in a book you are, the longer it takes you to read it. Nobody wants to tell their good friend, who asks how they liked their book, "I just couldn't pick it up!"

and again need the laugh emoji 😂

Or with Phoebe's awful guitar songs.

See, that’s the easy one - I have read all my author friends’ novels. But I like books so that’s not a hardship for me.

….although the one that was basically Young Guns romantic fan fiction was excruciatingly bad, but to put that one aside…

OP, this is what I mean - you like performing and performance so of course you’d be happy to go to support a friend. I don’t so I wouldn’t. But I would read their novels* because that’s sufficiently within my circle of interest to make an effort.

*and then die a thousand deaths when asked about the cowboy erotica. All my other author friends are actually good, though. It’s just that one

I really don’t like choirs unless they are a professional gospel or choral choir. I love my friends but still wouldn’t go and watch them in an amateur choir performance. I don’t mind if choirs sing at community events but I would never seek them out.

The only choirs I would see out of duty are my children's.

I often go along to these things because it's an evening out and not expensive and it supports people.

I know a few people who are in similar groups, am dram, choirs and so on. They mention it in conversation and i go "oh that's nice" or similar but I don't go. Its their hobby and enjoyment not mine. YABU

Christ it’s like in Friends when they all go to see Joey in a play and they’re bagsying which bland phrase they can use to sound vaguely positive and supportive.

“The lighting was great…”

You seem to have genuine difficulty imagining how other people might feel about things. To the extent that it doesn’t seem to be a concept you understand.

Fuck I’d hate this. It’s harder to say “hell no!” when someone is waving a poster in your face and saying “I’ll book the tickets for you!” Not fair to do that to someone.

I would go to the odd performances but I must admit going to watch a choir wouldn't be my thing.

You say your friends all know when your choir events are happening but there's a difference between remembering vaguely that you have mentioned a concert in July and remembering exactly where and when. Do you ask friends to put up posters advertising your events? Do you post on FB and ask them to share? Do you mention in a group chat, say you would love them to come along and offer to book their tickets?

No, but the fear of being asked can weigh heavy 😂

We're an amateur choir but pretty good

For me this is the problem. I love choirs and concerts. An amateur choir who is pretty good would not be something I want to see / hear. I want it done properly by professionals or I won't bother going to see it. It just wouldn't be something I'd enjoy.

Hearing a beautiful piece butchered by an amateur choir, wouldn't be my idea of fun.

Is it something like rock choir? In which case hard no. Is it classical chamber choir, then maybe if it's decent

Do they not see that reading a book is a massive commitment? Buying it is the easy part, and I will do that. Read it, almost never.

I would go along to support you, if you were my friend, @LaChanteuse ! I'm going against the grain here, but if a friend of mine was engaged in something like this, and it raised funds for charity, I'd definitely go. I don't understand why people would think it's boring, it's music! I've been to plays, dance events, music recitals and art exhibitions because they involved friends.
Were they all to my taste? No, but sometimes I just like to support friends, plus it's good to get out of your comfort zone!

It's not hard to focus positively on their enthusiasm or 'strong sound' or something, but maybe say that you're not overly struck on that genre of music.

It doesn't have to be either you were the most amazing choir to ever grace the earth and I will never miss a single minute of your performances as long as I live, or you were a cacaphonous musical binfire and I now want to have my ears surgically blocked off.