To be annoyed none of my friends have come to my concerts?

Meh. I have hobbies, my friends have hobbies. Neither are interesting to the other and we get on fine and manage to “support each other” in plenty of other ways.

Torturing someone with am dram isn’t a necessary part of friendship.

Blimey. That's a bit of a reach. Also quite disheartening that someone can't conceive that a husband would support his wife willingly just because he loves her, wants to he supportive and enjoys seeing her doing something she loves.

My partner comes to every one one of my gigs and I go to his. Not because either of us is controlling and neither of us is allowed to say no but because we both want to be there. The only time we've missed a gig of the others is when we've both had one the same night.

I go to my friends' choir concerts whenever I can. I get what you're saying about support for one another. My DH comes to mine, but no friends, really. My friends buy my books but I don't know if they read them!

Have you asked if he enjoys coming? If not I feel very sad for him. I may be off the mark here but are you a little bit controlling and he can’t say no?

Can't you see how that's missing the point?

My friends come to my amateur orchestra concerts and I go watch their Gilbert and Sullivan shows. My stuff isn't their cup of tea and I don't massively enjoy light operatics but we're friends so we support each other.

I think it's odd that none have come to a single concert. I'd go along to see and support my friends in pretty much any activity/performance etc that they were taking part it at least once. YANBU imo.

Ugh.

I do live in a world I am proud of....AND I am amused.

good for you. I dont like cynicism, inwaktnto live in a world I am proud of.

keep on being amused.

not sad at all....amused

🤣🤣🤣

sad you!

I guess it depends on the choir. I loathe church type choir music and loathe gospel/capella type choir music in the main. Maybe that's their problem.

Just by the bye, have you actually asked them. I'd be more inclined if I thought it was important to someone that I was there.

Maybe they’re not interested … have you asked them to go?

But choir is your hobby? Not theirs. I’d no more expect to see you in your hobby than I’d expect you to sit and watch me do DIY.

Me me me.. poor you! 😬 I wouldnt go either.. bad enough having to go to our little darlings choirs, let alone our fully grown, sulky, woe is me adult friends choirs.
My answer probably would have been different, however you've chosen not to see anyone else's perspective (your way of friendship is not everyone's way of friendship) on this.

oh bullshit

Exactly this.
I'm glad you enjoy it @LaChanteuse, but it's your thing, not theirs.

Ah no, they clearly wouldn’t enjoy that. I’m also in a Choir & my friends don’t come see me. No big fizz 😁

I know what you mean. I decided a little while ago to try different things, different experiences and go outside my comfort zone. There have been some hits and some misses, but I'm glad I went to different concerts, plays and exhibitions and tried different types of music!

I really don’t find it life affirming. I’ve seen the kind of varied and more modern performances you’re getting at. Life affirming is not a phrase I would choose. I want to see a choir group as much as I want to see Stomp or Riverdance.

I get that it’s your thing and you clearly love it but it’s mind numbing to me, however well put together, professional, talented and so on.

I don’t need to explore it. I like solo vocalists. I like going to see bands. I have zero interest in choir groups whatsoever, no matter what their style is. The tv series The Choir plus Britain’s Got Talent and the like have increased their popularity and there’s now a choir in every community. I get it, it’s a great way for people who can’t sing to blend into a group and feel like they are singing, and it’s great for socialising… but it’s not for me. Neither participating, nor watching.

We don’t need to explore everything in life if we don’t want to. Even for friends. I have a few friends who are in our local choir group. They love it and good for them. I’m not going to watch it. I’ve been there when they’ve needed emergency childcare, been stuck with car troubles, have needed a shoulder to cry on etc. I don’t need to see them all singing and clapping together, one voice indistinguishable from the next. I’m not interested.

Of course you can expect but not demand.

@LaChanteuse
this world needs more love not less. i would so go to support my friends. I ve seen some of them playing a match i wasnt interested in, i ve watched a friend som playing rugby, i ve been to charity events to support others, to name but a few.

it doesnt matter whether i am interested in what they are doing, i am interested in them and thats what matter. If they are friends then i love them (otherwise they wouldnt be my friends) and because i love them i support them when I can.

it s up to us to build our village and support each other. You give, you pass the kindness forward and thats make for a better world for our children to grow in.

i hate selfishness, entitlement and the attitude that is me first.

My husband and I have a friend who is a professional drummer. Tickets can be expensive but we try and watch him once per year. I don’t think you’re being unreasonable at all to want your friends to support you. They can make a night of it - dinner first or after etc.

Yes, but, to be fair, they're not usually performance type hobbies!