AIBU we leave on holiday tomorrow morning and …

My adhd son wouldn’t read the list or if he did and he didn’t actually see the items in front of him then still wouldn’t pack them.

as I say 🤷‍♀️ I have such little opp to “mum” my teens these days that where I can do things like this for them… I jump at it!

How about meet in the middle

op includes relevant info in op
and I’ll read all OP updates to ensure I don’t miss something

I have saved a a packing list for my kids on the I pad and sent it to them ( on request ) , have a few variables such as ‘ski holiday’ sailing holiday’ . They pack at their own pace and take consequences for anything forgotten but if we have an early start DH has a bags at the door policy as we are often heading for a ferry / plane . DS sticks post its on the front door occasionally with is last minute list such as headphones and electronic toothbrush etc

I know it's too late now, but ...

DH is still playing a computer game. I reminded him again, but that’s the last time

turn the effing router off!

Not unreasonable at all — they’re old enough to take responsibility, especially with teens involved. You've done your part, and it’s not like you haven’t reminded them. Sometimes the best lesson is letting natural consequences play out (even if it means wearing the same t-shirt twice 😅).
That said, maybe one last gentle “final call” tonight wouldn’t hurt — just to avoid full-on chaos in the morning. But definitely don’t take on the stress of packing for everyone. You deserve a break too!

Even if op wasn’t getting a ferry depending on the distance alone you can need to leave early and especially to beat the traffic.

When we go to place 4-7 hours away by car we always make sure we leave at silly o’clock because by the time Dh decides it’s time to pull over for a leg stretch and toilet break you can bet on the fact the motorway will have so many more cars on it by the time our rest is done than before we stopped.

Same as how driving home always takes longer. Because you don’t leave till 10/11/12 or even the late afternoon. Traffic has built up, an accident has happened. The road work diversions are now in place every time. A 4 hour becomes then a 6 hour because you left when it was busier and shit happens.

Id rather leave at 2am and enjoy a empty road and then a stroll by the beach or though a forest whole I wait for check in than ending up stuck in a tail back for ages boiling my tits off.

Or maybe, you know, read?

I pack all clothes for my teen son as he has adhd and it would be a shit show if left to own devices, and I have zero issue with it. Got to be honest, I love any opp to “mother” him these days.

id do the same for my NT DD given half the chance! but she loves packing her own

The husband ended up with sunburn as he refused to ask for his hat or suncream

and he didn’t just buy? How peculiar
and surely not every family member packs their own sun cream?

maybe include details like that in the OP
a touch relevant wouldn’t you agree?

But they were catching a ferry.

Doesn’t anyone read anything the OP posts anymore? Is it unfashionable? Can we make it a ‘thing’ to read what the OP has actually written please?

I hate packing the night before; I'll only do it on the rare occasion that I need to be at the airport pre 9am for a work flight.

You're not catching a flight and they're hardly going to leave the house with empty cases, so the worst that's going to happen is you leave a bit later in the morning. I don't see the issue 🤷🏻‍♂️

My son got back from hols at 1.30am, he was up at 5.30am the same day for a second holiday !!

Well, as OP said, they were catching a ferry so yes, they did have to leave at that time.

so as not to drip feed, it’s a U.K. self catering holiday but we have to leave at 8am tomorrow, and the location is remote.

oh don’t be a drama llama

its a uk break. “Remote” “we have to leave at 8am” 😆

Well this sounds like it’s going to be a lovely happy family holiday

I'd probably do it for them or stand over them while they do it. My holidays are my biggest joy and so i would want everyone packed and ready tonight. Its not unusual for me to start packing 2 weeks beforehand and luckily my teen daughters feed off my excitement and are pretty organised too. Hubby though is a different story and can never get his head around packing so invariably i end up doing it for him. The stress of a last minute panic in the morning would just ruin it for me and then next year i would seriously think about going away without them.

Just leave them to it. We’re going on a European city break tomorrow and none of us have thought of packing yet (though we’ve washed clothes we want to take). Packing takes 10 mins.

Take your overnight bag and ask a friend to put you up overnight or use a motel. Tell them you will be coming back in the mornin,g and if they are not read,y you'll go anyway. They will be ok as your Best Beloved obviously will still be there for them. You say the two older teens, so presumably there are other children, so take them with you. Good Luck.Personally, I'd be tempted to cut the plugs off the gadgets, games, TV etc so they would have plenty of time to get ready!

It really is. I also stay over at an airport hotel the night before if long haul. Handbag only on the flight!

Even though you didn't end up doing anyone else's packing, it still sounds like your husband is causing you to waste a lot of time and expend a lot of unnecessary energy. If this is an ongoing pattern, it might be worth making sure he is aware of that and finding out why he thinks this is OK.

@Sundaybananas Honestly just here standing by for when you show him the texts and replies that prove you explained absolutely everything to him in advance... I do love a bit of 'I told you so'...

Were I so anal I don't think I would bother going on holiday! I used to know someone who waited until husband and children were sitting in the car ready to go then she went back into the house and hoovered/dusted throughout!

My best packing was done with 10 minutes notice, OH and 2 children too, we'd had a call about a family death and we were on the road within 15 minutes. There is a thing about having too much time!

When kids were secondary age we all packed for ourselves . I’d get them to put out everything for their bag and we’d do a quick check to make sure before they popped it in the bag . Responsibility with overseeing from us .
Their own little back packs they could put in what they wanted toys and games wise ,
DD managed a year travelling with a smallish back pack . Super efficient travel packer now!