HR rejected grievance I made against Colleague

Its possible he also meant plumped, which is an industry term used in advertising.

At work once, one of the older guys came in and said 'just what I have seen, a sign for a brazillian blow dry at the salon downstairs' he was shocked and horrified at this sign as he had assumed the only 'brazillian' was a style of pubic hair... and we had a great laugh explaining to him the difference between brazillian wax and brazillian blow dry.

It was the type of work environment where there wad a lot of friendly banter and a close knit group so it wasn't weird. Just very, very funny 😂

Huh? But that is literally what we're doing? I'm not surprised the grievance was not upheld. I am embarrassed for you, op!

HR departments really have their work cut out these days don’t they. 😐

If OP is in Scotland it was definitely sexual and inappropriate.

How was it 'obviously a malicious sexual comment'? There is nothing obvious about it, it was a statement of fact.

He didn't say 'getting pumped'. He said 'getting HER LIPS pumped'. One is sexual, the other is factual. I'm not surprised that HR threw this one out.

Wow, serious overreaction on your part. You've made yourself look unprofessional and really rather foolish. If you're going to have your lips filled, then what do you expect people to say?! It sounds as if you've let your dislike of this man cloud your judgement.

Would it?

Maybe it would is your misogynistic assumption that surgeon's are always male?

It took me a few minutes to work out what the innuendo would be to be honest. It's not an uncommon way to describe lip filler.

I think that’s quite the reach to be honest.

I think youre being a bit silly here.
He describes what you said you were doing. You took it in a certain way. Maybe he was being crude but maybe he wasnt.
Big pumped lips do look very sexually suggestive though, like a fake boob cleavage on your face.

How do you know this was innuendo ? Were you there ? Because that’s the only way to know for sure, so that you have context. As a stand alone comment l think it says more about someone who would jump straight to sexual innuendo when the subject is lip filler - he described exactly what happens. And that MN is predominantly a woman’s website is irrelevant. The fact is that most posters didn’t see the connection because it’s a leap. The law on sexual harassment exists to prevent workplace colleagues from actual harassment, not imagined slights they’ve pretzeled themselves into making.

I can understand if he has made a long line of sexual innuendos how, "getting your lips pumped", could be interpreted as a sexual innuendo.

However, it's not one that could be proven.

Choose one next time where there can be no mistake what he meant.

He's the oldest member of the team and you think his age should mean he behaves differently to others - can he complain about age discrimination on that basis? I think you have discussed personnal business openly at work and someone probably judged you on it - did the lips mean lip or vaginal lips, we'll never know - it wasn't the first thing I thought of. I assume he'll avoid speaking to you again on such matters - you'd be best to do the same.
@TempyBrennan sorry I didn't mean to quote you and I can't delete it now.

I think if he had said 'the surgeon is going to pump her lips' then that would have been a bit more suggestive.

There is no potential for sexual comment - it doesn’t meet the definition of sexual harassment however hard you try. And that’s the point. You can’t just ‘ask around’ to try to make it fit - which is why HR have dismissed it.

HR made the right decision.

He could have meant it as a sexual innuendo, but you can't prove it.

He didnt say "she is going to have sex"

What he said is accurate to what you were doing

Choose one of his comments to report, that he can't deny is a sexual comment. Not this one.

Yes, and according to Wiki it's meaning is to do with a type of security fraud.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pump_and_dump

Same. Unless getting your lips ‘pumped’ has some meaning I have yet to understand.

Vice versa here, I’ve never heard it used in the context of what you are saying only breast milk.

Which further evidences why internal interpretation is flawed. Everyone has their own view and it’s very difficult to prove intent when actually maybe there isn’t any.

Imagine if he countered with “well she said she was getting her lips (vaginal) filled (insert whatever filling method here you like)”

It’s ridiculous to take words used in a dictionary which have explicit meanings and turn them into something inappropriate in your own internal interpretation.

I've never heard the expression pumped and dumped used for breastmilk.

I understand pumped and dumped as being shagged and then ghosted/ignored.

Weird thread this, OP - quite extreme reactions from wanting you to explain the possible sexual undertones of the comment graphically to HR, to accusing you of bullying. Probably not too helpful for you...

I think the PP who said you 'picked the wrong comment' to complain about has a point. But given that this colleague had form, it's also understandable that you finally responded to one of the long line of comments.

Don't let it drive you out of the company or (unless creepy colleague gets too much) out of the team. Hold your head high; it may have been the wrong moment to raise the issue but it's an issue that needed raising.

It was ambiguous enough in meaning that HR could not take any action.

I agree with PP that this was not the right comment to use to expose this man's alleged behaviour.

It's not a stretch. That clearly was the innuendo he was making.

Disappointing that on a women's website, women are so quick to attack the OP because apparently the comment was absolutely fine (and because clearly some people have a problem with women getting lip filler). I'm just surprised nobody's called her a woke snowflake yet.