Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to reschedule my friend tomorrow

155 replies

gollyimholly · 30/06/2025 01:16

Due to see a friend for dinner tomorrow. I'm 4 months pregnant and not feeling great.

Dinner is in central London and it's apparently 35°C tomorrow. It would mean roughly an hour's journey using buses and the tube (not air conditioned) during rush hour - so could get warmer than 35°C underground. I'm feeling apprehensive as I'm already uncomfortable - and that's me being indoors with the fan on when it's 10° cooler.

I don't use the tube often but worried it could break down and then what if I'm stuck in the heat..

I see this friend maybe a couple of times a year. We used to see each other maybe once a month or every couple of months but it has drastically reduced since having a baby a couple of years ago. We organised it on Wednesday last week and I wasn't paying attention to what the weather might be like.

Do I sound like I'm being precious? AIBU to ask to reschedule?

OP posts:
TrousersOfTime · 30/06/2025 01:38

I don't have kids. I'd absolutely understand if one of my pregnant friends cancelled in these circumstances!

DelphiniumBlue · 30/06/2025 01:33

I’d cancel, tell the truth, that youre pregnant, feeling unwell and really suffering in the heat and are not up to travelling atm. She’ll probably be pleased she won’t have to travel into the centre in the heat as well. It’s not flaky, it’s looking after yourself.

Original poster
gollyimholly · 30/06/2025 01:33

Urgh. I also do not want to be that friend...

I could have been better at paying attention to how it would be similarly hot tomorrow and getting things organised in better time.

I will (grudgingly) go..

Maybe important to add though - with toddler plus pregnancy, my interest in seeing friends or doing anything that isn't 100% necessary has just totally diminished. In fact, I maybe went out without DD for pure pleasure just a couple of times last year.

OP posts:
OneGiddyRubyViewer · 30/06/2025 01:28

You have a right to reschedule, but you should have told her before now. You’ve given her less than 24 notice.

In your shoes I’d probably cancel citing sickness/flu as a white lie (as I can’t bear the heat) but I’d expect her to think I was a bit flaky and not ask to see me again.

up to you if you want to deal with the fallout.

you should’ve told her earlier, it’s been roasting all week. YABU to not bother until the very day it’s arranged for.

Pennyforyourthoughtsplease · 30/06/2025 01:20

Don't be that flaky friend, or don't expect to remain friends for much longer if you have form for this. I don't think you're very good friends if the friendship is weather dependant tbh!