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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be annoyed at my neighbours for this?

263 replies

Amybelle88 · 29/06/2025 23:11

Perfectly open to hearing that I’m being unreasonable on this.

For background and context - I live on a new build estate that has 70 odd houses privately owned by a corporate landlord - the estate is marketed as a family estate, and is therefore mainly occupied by families with kids.

We are a family of 4 with 2 kids aged 8 and 9. They’re good kids. And I’m not just saying that cos I’m one of those knobhead mums who thinks her babies can do no wrong, they’re genuinely just sound kids.

Our house is a semi detached house - we’ve been here for 8 years and watched tenants come and go. Never had an issue with anyone, so much so the previous neighbour is now one of my best friends. I’m conscious of noise as new builds are notorious for being able to hear your neighbours do so much as fart, but I don’t hear them and according to my now friend, she never heard us, either.

We are relatively quiet people - we are in bed by 9, don’t drink or have parties, don’t play music loud - we don’t even watch TV really. Fully aware that we sound like boring bastards 😂 we’ve never had a problem with our current neighbours - polite hello when we see them etc. So as not to drip feed, my husband always said he thought they were a bit rude but I didn’t notice it as much - I just think some people are more private than others.

We have lots of green space and a massive field in front of our house - because of this, our kids rarely play in the garden and I don’t let them play football, mainly because these houses are mass produced fucking shoeboxes with a lot of them jammed into one place - if they were to kick the ball and hit the fence it is a noise nuisance for around 12 houses and not just our immediate neighbours. Nobody wants to hear a fence being twatted by a ball all day, whether they’ve got kids or not.

Today, they had a game of catch with their Dad and the ball went over the fence, so they asked could they knock at the neighbours and ask for it back, we said yes. They have done this one other time in the whole of the 18 months that they’ve been here - they were playing basketball and I now no longer allow them to play basketball because I don’t want the ball going over the fence.

The neighbour has given my kids down the banks and said they are making her life inconvenient by kicking the ball over.

It’s literally only happened once before and it was a long time ago - when my previous neighbours from any side of my fence managed to kick a ball over, which happened often, I’d just think nothing of it and just throw it back.

If my kids were doing this often and it was a consistent problem, I’d be the first to side with the neighbour, I’d be mortified that we were causing a problem for someone. My stance at the minute is I think she’s a bit of a rude dickhead.

My husband knocked and asked if she was ok as the kids said they’d been shouted at - she replied with “yes, they kicked the ball over, they always do it” to which my husband said “what? No they don’t, they’re just kids but it’s not a frequent issue either.” Neighbour replied with “so what?” - husband said “what do you mean so what? I’m just trying to have a conversation with you?” To which she huffed and puffed and went back in.

I get that kids frequently kicking a ball over into your garden would be a fucking pain in the arse, but this isn’t what’s happening here. We’ve knocked to see if there wa a genuine issue but got nowhere. She was a rude arsehole. I also think if there was a problem she should have spoke to me or my husband as we are the adults, rather than shout at my 8 and 9 year old who just asked for their ball back.

To be honest, my hormones are getting the better of me right now and I feel like getting all of the flat balls and lashing them over into her garden for her miserable face to stare at and feel inner rage at.

I often take parcels in for them - as I do for other neighbours - not particularly something that bothers me as it’s just neighbourly? Some big bastard fuck off parcels, too - which, in my tiny hall means we have to clamber over them until she gets off her high horse and comes to pick them up. But hey ho, they’re not there forever and I’m only being cunty about it now as she’s rattled my cage because not once have I moaned about that ‘inconvenience’. Not even when I was in the midst of shaving my gorilla legs and had to dive out of the bath soaking wet and looking like a fat tramp with half shaved legs to open the door to the dpd driver for more of her shit.

I’m not one of those parents who thinks that those who don’t have kids should have to put up with other peoples kids, cos truth be told, even though I’ve got kids, most other peoples kids annoy me. But a ball going over the fence really isn’t a big deal, is it?!

And surely, if you don’t want to deal with the potential issues kids bring, don’t move onto an estate marketed at families that is slap bang in the middle of three primary schools.

You know what, I’m still open to replies but after writing that I just think she’s a dick and next time I get a parcel for her I’m either a) gonna jump all over it b) throw it over the fence c) knock fuck out of her front door until she gets her arse out of bed to take delivery of her own shit.

Also can’t believe I’ve just spent so much time writing a post about a ball going over a fence, but here we are. Middle age creeps up fucking fast, I used to take mdma in Ibiza, now look at me.

PS I’m moving soon. Fuck that ho.

OP posts:
RightOnTheEdge · 30/06/2025 22:08

OneCosyCrow was on another thread today saying a poster was being aggressive and hostile towards them and asking them to stop quoting him/her 😆🤣

OneCosyCrow · 30/06/2025 22:07

HarkerandBarker · 30/06/2025 22:05

An interior designer! You're thinking of an interior decorator. You are so narrow minded but I might have eggs like sawdust but better than having brains like sawdust 🤣🤣🤣

Adds, doesn't understands sarcasm to the list of highly undesirable character traits.

HarkerandBarker · 30/06/2025 22:05

OneCosyCrow · 30/06/2025 21:57

Please don’t tell me your degree is in Interior Designs? 🤣 I’m sure that was challenging, moving furniture around and hanging mirrors on walls. But I’m sure it was within your capabilities. Judging by the state of your garden I imagine not a successful one? Very bland love. Like you. I’m sure you are hot. I understand hot flushes happen during menopause but I gather you’re well over that stage. Eggs like sawdust.

An interior designer! You're thinking of an interior decorator. You are so narrow minded but I might have eggs like sawdust but better than having brains like sawdust 🤣🤣🤣

OneCosyCrow · 30/06/2025 22:04

HarkerandBarker · 30/06/2025 22:01

You are a prize aren't you?

That’s all I get? You were giving the big balls speech earlier on. I’m disappointed to say the least. But I guess you’re use to doing that.

AuntyHistamine · 30/06/2025 22:03

Certainly some love on this thread 😳

HarkerandBarker · 30/06/2025 22:01

OneCosyCrow · 30/06/2025 21:57

Please don’t tell me your degree is in Interior Designs? 🤣 I’m sure that was challenging, moving furniture around and hanging mirrors on walls. But I’m sure it was within your capabilities. Judging by the state of your garden I imagine not a successful one? Very bland love. Like you. I’m sure you are hot. I understand hot flushes happen during menopause but I gather you’re well over that stage. Eggs like sawdust.

You are a prize aren't you?

IchiNiSanShiGo · 30/06/2025 21:59

OneCosyCrow · 30/06/2025 21:22

I’m clearly American or are you too obtuse to figure that out. Clearly.

Oh, bless your heart 😘

OneCosyCrow · 30/06/2025 21:57

HarkerandBarker · 30/06/2025 21:48

Jack ass. I have a degree BA (hons) 1st. Am a professional Interior Designer. Actually ma'am.

And more experience with all kinds of people than you.
College girl. Oops....I meant granny.

And I'm hot not haggered.

Anyone can be young at heart. Obviously you was born old. Matron.

Please don’t tell me your degree is in Interior Designs? 🤣 I’m sure that was challenging, moving furniture around and hanging mirrors on walls. But I’m sure it was within your capabilities. Judging by the state of your garden I imagine not a successful one? Very bland love. Like you. I’m sure you are hot. I understand hot flushes happen during menopause but I gather you’re well over that stage. Eggs like sawdust.

HarkerandBarker · 30/06/2025 21:50

Amybelle88 · 30/06/2025 21:47

Girls you are all fabulous 😂😂 apart from the odd one popping with a rod up their holes, you’ve all made me howl laughing.

Just to add - I am actually moving - not far, but far enough away from the football nazi next door. I’ve been trying to connect to her Bluetooth speakers all afternoon in a plot to play tiptoe through the tulips at 3am on them. Cue more people telling me I’m uncouth and unhinged.

They're probably right but I’m ok with it 😂

Life is too short for airs and graces! Just be you. If anyone can't handle it's their loss! 😘

HarkerandBarker · 30/06/2025 21:48

OneCosyCrow · 30/06/2025 21:41

It really does show how classless you are. Embarrassing behaviour, aren’t you nearly 60? I guess being old doesn’t make you any wiser. Imagine someone who is almost a pensioner acting like that. I guess my impression that Brits are uneducated and scummy still holds. Past your bed time grandma. Night night x

Jack ass. I have a degree BA (hons) 1st. Am a professional Interior Designer. Actually ma'am.

And more experience with all kinds of people than you.
College girl. Oops....I meant granny.

And I'm hot not haggered.

Anyone can be young at heart. Obviously you was born old. Matron.

Amybelle88 · 30/06/2025 21:47

Girls you are all fabulous 😂😂 apart from the odd one popping with a rod up their holes, you’ve all made me howl laughing.

Just to add - I am actually moving - not far, but far enough away from the football nazi next door. I’ve been trying to connect to her Bluetooth speakers all afternoon in a plot to play tiptoe through the tulips at 3am on them. Cue more people telling me I’m uncouth and unhinged.

They're probably right but I’m ok with it 😂

OP posts:
Amuseaboosh · 30/06/2025 21:44

I kept scrolling and scrolling and scrolling and it just wouldn't stop!!!

OneCosyCrow · 30/06/2025 21:44

HarkerandBarker · 30/06/2025 21:33

But they can be dragged down. What's wrong with you. I know we wouldn't have won ww2 without you but you're letting it go to your head a bit. Don't you think?

Well of course you’ll be old enough to remember that. Doesn’t surprise me you mentioned it. But you’re welcome grandmother.

OneFineDay13 · 30/06/2025 21:43

ScratCat · 29/06/2025 23:22

Christ, was it necessary to wang on so much?

I didn’t even make it to the end, so I don’t know if you’re being unreasonable or not.

That was a novel jeez

HarkerandBarker · 30/06/2025 21:42

Amy, you have made a good handful of friends here. So you are the winner 🏆 🥇 👊

OneCosyCrow · 30/06/2025 21:41

HarkerandBarker · 30/06/2025 21:31

Then get your big ass outta here! Ma'am.

Dumb ass American preaching!

That does explain why you haven't been able to show any intellect on any of your replies.

Shoot first ask questions later 😂😂😂

It really does show how classless you are. Embarrassing behaviour, aren’t you nearly 60? I guess being old doesn’t make you any wiser. Imagine someone who is almost a pensioner acting like that. I guess my impression that Brits are uneducated and scummy still holds. Past your bed time grandma. Night night x

HarkerandBarker · 30/06/2025 21:41

andthat · 30/06/2025 21:40

Me too.

Me too!

andthat · 30/06/2025 21:40

JustGotToKeepOnKeepingOn · 29/06/2025 23:49

I loved your post. I’d love to go afternoon drinking with you OP.

Good luck with the move.

Me too.

Sparticle · 30/06/2025 21:40

@Amybelle88 it’s a shame that your thread has got a bit derailed.

I just wanted to say that 1) yes please of course we want a parking thread and 2) you write incredibly well and entertainingly (is that even a word?). If you wrote a book I’d buy it.

RightOnTheEdge · 30/06/2025 21:39

I enjoyed your rant OP! 🤣
Yeah you could have explained in three sentences, but where is the fun in that?

Stop taking her parcels in and inconveniencing yourself. Let her rearrange delivery or trek to the post office to get them.

I have little kids on one side and teenagers on the other. Balls come over from both sides and if I see them I chuck them straight back or sometimes they knock and ask and I happily give them back.
They do the same for us because that is how normal people behave.

lifeonthelane · 30/06/2025 21:39

This is the most beautifully written post I've ever read 🤣

HarkerandBarker · 30/06/2025 21:38

I think she's gone 🙏

HarkerandBarker · 30/06/2025 21:33

OneCosyCrow · 30/06/2025 21:32

Not everyone was dragged up

But they can be dragged down. What's wrong with you. I know we wouldn't have won ww2 without you but you're letting it go to your head a bit. Don't you think?

OneCosyCrow · 30/06/2025 21:32

BedChem · 30/06/2025 21:20

Oh for fuck sake unclench.

Not everyone was dragged up

HarkerandBarker · 30/06/2025 21:31

OneCosyCrow · 30/06/2025 21:22

I’m clearly American or are you too obtuse to figure that out. Clearly.

Then get your big ass outta here! Ma'am.

Dumb ass American preaching!

That does explain why you haven't been able to show any intellect on any of your replies.

Shoot first ask questions later 😂😂😂