I need a break from my life

OP your partner should be happy for you that you have this opportunity to get away for a break and recharge your batteries. I wonder if he has taken it the wrong way and when you say you need a break from your life, he thinks you mean you need a break from him? Is he a bit too reliant on you for company? Does he have friends, hobbies etc?

@catspyjamas1has your BF never heard of pple going to retreats, yoga holidays or walking (or whatever) holidays solo? Maybe if it were pitched more like this he’d find it less “weird”. Does he know how stretched & near to burnout you feel? (maybe that’s an exaggeration so forgive me). He sounds quite narrow minded & concerned what others think & how you could possibly want to be away from him for any length of time & therefore must be wanting something /someone else. When this is nothing to do with him this is about you & what you need to recharge, reset & completely relax. If he cared about what you’re truly going through emotionally he’d be able to understand & see this as a wellness break. You say he is your biggest advocate usually so is surprising he’s reacting like this - as you both live independently too. Where do his trust issues stem from do you think? You really don’t need to be worrying about all his crap when you just need a break from life. Maybe express again how close to breaking pint you are? Show him some yoga retreats & the itinerary (ie doing nothing). Good luck!

I love travelling and also value my alone time. I’m single which is handy but I wouldn’t be happy if a partner stopped me from going away alone.

Only he can tell you why it's unreasonable to him. Then you can listen to his concerns and make your decision.

But tbh if you need it, can afford, aren't spending all your money on it so you can't afford to do things with him and haven't got a history of cheating im not sure what his answer could be that would impact my choice.

Sounds an amazing trip, I'm very jealous. Enjoy it!

So what does he want to do? Go with you? Not go at all? You are quite entitled to head off for some breathing space for a few days.

some people are surprisingly weird about women travelling on their own. But this is their problem, not yours.

From what I understand he doesn’t dictate or stonewall, etc.
May be, he thinks you are vulnerable as a solo female traveler? Or that it’s something that should be a shared experience. I would be upset if my best friend didn’t want me included in her travelling, as an example… I guess it depends on whether you get a chance to travel together and how often.
Could be the introvert/ extrovert personalities.

I think writing down to explain is a good idea. Keep speaking to each other.

He’s the one who’s weird. Why would he feel it necessary to tell his colleagues that you have gone away on your own? And even if he did, after an 11 year relationship in which you still don’t live together or seemingly have any plans to do so, I don’t think your solo holiday is the thing which his colleagues are going to focus on. It’s fine to have these separate lives if that works for both of you but he can’t have his cake and eat it – if you are living separately then he doesn’t get to dictate what you do with all the time that you are not with him. And as for his comment about trust issues – You don’t need to go abroad in order to cheat on him! He either trusts you or not – you’re presumably not going to be overcome with some incredible lust if you spend a couple of days in a sunny climate.

I don’t know what to say then OP

I am sure he has a lot of lovely qualities but this seems like a very bizarre and unfair reaction to a very normal thing for you to be doing, and would be a red flag / something to seek counselling on(?) in my book. you must be so disappointed and hurt by this OP

If he can’t get over it, then he’s not the man for you. He should be encouraging you to do this for your mental and physical health.

Well if he doesn't trust you after all this time together and knowing you so well I'm sorry to say I think it's time to end it.

It's healthy to spend time apart and certainly the holiday you describe would be really good for YOU.

I would take this very seriously. Please do go on the holiday and have a really good think where this relationship is at.

Out of interest has he ever had affairs? Often those with trust issues are the ones play away. They cheat so assume you might given the chance.

Your trip sounds bliss. I would say ‘Look I don’t want to get wasted in Ibiza with all the girls. I don’t want to do a Shirley Valentine and meet a Greek god, I just want to read a book in the sun and drink expensive coffee and not have to speak to anyone. I love you more than anyone else in the world, but for the sake of my mental health I just want to recharge. That’s all it is. Recharging for a few days.’

Go for it and don't think twice x

I agree that’s a rather strange reaction from him OP… You have a lovely chunk of free time and should maximise it.

Why does he have to tell anyone at work you’ve gone anywhere? If he feels compelled to - it’s because you have extra days and wanted to see the magicians of narnia and he didn’t want to / couldn’t as he isn’t between jobs.

if he lacks trust, that’s a different issue: I’d be worried he’d sulk during the planning, harass or stonewall during and flare up after, and frankly he has no grounds for those shenanagins at all.

It's really not difficult to reply to specific people, just use @ and then their user name, just as you have done here. Alternatively use the Quote facility under their post and type your answer in the box. You can then clear the quote if their comment was long or you don't think it's necessary that everyone reads it again.

You don't even live together and he gets a cob on because you want to go away on your own? There's no way I'd put up with that OP. If neither of you want to live together, then why would he think you shouldn't go away alone? It might be different if he was used to you being there at home with him all the time, although it still wouldn't be right, but under these circumstances, I think it's very odd, and I certainly wouldn't be giving in to him. Enjoy your trip and the peace and quiet that it brings you OP!