Grossed out by new partner walking in when I was showering

At what point in the 30 years do you go “we don’t care anymore about shitting in front of each other”?! Today is my 17th anniversary and I can’t see us getting to that point in the next 13 years! Minging

@Raindropsandroses123 sorry the fecking useless swipe function lost your quote again.

Again, trying to be kind about this rather than say what I actually think.

He put OP in a position where she was forced to watch him shit in front of her. Unless she had agreed to that, that’s crossing a line which for most people is a boundary

So did my husband but I can’t think of anything worse that either of us shitting in front of the other 🤢

Because there are bigger things in life to worry and fuss about.

In our house the loos are separate so this will never be an issue.

Thank God!

Why do you put up with this?! “Three kids in” is no excuse.

100% chapping the door announcing a code brown is acceptable going in and doing it is with the other 5ft away washing is not 😂

Yes, but everybody doesn’t do it in front of other people.

Yuk!

🤣🤣 In all my 35 years of marriage, husband and I have never ever 💩 in front of each other. Weeing no problem (although in his case, I'm not keen on seeing it coming out!) But 💩 no way! And we're not prudish. We only have one bathroom now as well but if we were desperate we'd just ask the other to hurry up.

Aw no that’s way too much, both DH and I have nipped in for a quick pee, not a poop and not until well (years) into the relationship. Though for better or worse this far down the line do both openly pump in front of the other with no comment 😂(unless eating, or comment if one is particularly rancid 😂)

Oh god no!
Complete turn off.

It’s a natural fact of life honey… everyone does it!!

Erm.. for being fucking disgusting?

That’s disgusting, no way would I be able to stay attracted to someone after seeing, hearing and smell them shit. What tf is wrong with people.

Well that’s for her to shout out and say. If she doesn’t say anything they he won’t know any different. It’s rant simple.

It's your first paragraph that makes him disgusting. If there was one toilet and he had asked if she'd minded, there wouldn't be an issue even if it isn't something everyone would be ok with.

Like thinking she's happy to watch/hear/smell him shit while she's in the shower despite having a second functional toilet in the house.

Like what? It can be just at face value and not mean anything else.

Holy fuck, that’s grim!

I have been married for half my life and DH and I have never seen each other doing a poo! Nor a wee for that matter unless you count DH doing lookout while I pee in the bushes!

It just isn’t necessary and frankly I don’t want to see DH’s pooing face, I’m guessing he feels the same🫣

It’s bad enough when we stay in hotels with poor sound insulation and I get the sound effects!

God no! What’s the matter with the man? I wouldn’t feel comfortable with him after this and it does sound like he’s trying to push you out of a comfort zone.

Again, having a piss isn’t really the same as a shag, though, is it? Unless you incorporate piss into your sex life - no judgement if you do - having sex with someone and watching them have a wee are two different things.

I don’t mind my partner having a pee in front of me when necessary, but it’s not a strange or unreasonable boundary for someone to have.

That would be the first and last time I showered when he's around OP. He should have knocked on the door, told you he needed to use the loo, and given you the chance to wrap yourself in a towel and vacate the bathroom if that's what you wanted. If he'd done that, and you were happy for him to perform in front of you, you could have then said, 'fine by me, come on in', but to not give you any choice when it's the first time you've stayed over, is just absolutely ill mannered and gross to me, I'd be ('scuse the pun) dumping him!

Having a shit is not remotely akin to having sex. Don’t be silly.

Anyway, it’s not just ‘seeing him on the loo’ - she was having a shower and he came in, and without asking if she minded, sat down and started curling one out.

I’ve been with my partner 22 years and we’ve certainly seen each other at our worst and most undignified, but that doesn’t mean that a) we don’t want some privacy now and again and b) we want to have a shower next to someone straining out a stinking turd.

It may or may not be boundary pushing. It may be that he genuinely does think this is normal, and maybe it is for him, regardless of how most people on this thread feel. The truth will come out if you choose to continue the relationship. Having expressed that you do not like it, it can never happen again. If it does, well there you have it. If he is a decent but deluded man, he will respect that you did not see it as a sign of comfort. If he is a boundary pushing arsehole, he will continue.

Yeah exactly - that makes it even worse right. He’s went out of his way to do this the first night she stays over.