Blowing rasberries. Should I be concerned?

I feel like I live on a different planet from everyone Lee sometimes.

grooming. Sarah’s law. What a load of hysterical nonsense.

I do however accept that it was acceptable “in my day” and may not be considered so now. But when I’d do this to my nieces and nephews and cousins and was considered to be grooming them I’d be horrified. It was playing.

some of these responses are bizarre

It's not up to the child to tell an adult they don't like being touched.

I wouldn't like it and would put a stop to it, but without implying that the man is a predator. For instance, could you say "Don’t encourage her to do that please Norman, we’re trying to teach her about boundaries and people keeping their bodies to themselves." It doesn’t matter if he or anyone else thinks you’re being OTT. She’s your child and such things are up to you.

At the same time, teach your DD that this is something only babies do and you don’t want her to do it any more.

It may be, but being in a room of other people is in no way protective, it's actually a known grooming tactic.

If this is all there is I think you are overreacting. This all sounds very normal.

I’ve blown raspberries on my own children’s bellies when they were babies and they thought it was hilarious. I wouldn’t even think of doing it to a child that was not my own.
I’ve never ever seen a child doing it to an adult. Wrong in my opinion and trust your instincts.

Best reply so far 😂

If someone came up to me and did this during my weekly ASDA shop, I know I wouldn't like it.

I'm often woken up at odd hours (3am-5am) by my cat sandpapering my face with her tongue (is this any good for removing dry skin?) and while some might think this is cute and affectionate, it is really a passive aggressive move on her part to wake me (normally because she wants me to get up and feed her Dreamies). Another tactic is pushing her nose into my ear and purring loudly... very loudly. I often dream there is a Boeing 747 in my bedroom about to take off.

Boundaries. She doesn't respect my boundaries... and I know she's grooming me (even though I feign deep sleep / being in a coma).

It just sounds like normal playing for that age to me, especially with an adult considered a grandparent and in a room of people.

Yes, you make a fair point. I should have said something at the time. Trying to avoid confrontation myself isn’t exactly teaching him a good lesson and I’ve resigned to only seeing this friend when he isn’t here. I know she doesn’t mean anything by it, she has loads of young nieces and nephews and is affectionate with all of them.

I do this with my Niece. It's also one of my favourite memories of my Dad doing it with me when I was little. He's blow raspberries on my tummy, and my niece blows them on my arm. Actually, that reminds me, we've not done it for a few years now, probably since she was about 4. I'll ask her on Sunday and see whether she'll still grab my arm and do it when I'm not paying attention. 🤣

Is this some sort of generational thing? Or because this is a girl? That everyone thinks it inappropriate and grooming behaviour.

My kids are now teen/young adult but they used to do this to their step-granddad, 12-17 years ago based on their ages. He had a big wobbly belly which was perfect for getting really good raspberries. It was all completely innocent. He also used to playfully 'bum smack' them, except it was never really actually a smack. It doesn't describe easily, but genuinely, it never ever felt inappropriate, just a older man messing about getting his grandkids to giggle and run away. All of it was just silly play.

By the time they were 4, they had all grown out of it. Then they used to help him in the garden, do other things together. He was a childlike man in many ways who was brilliant at entertaining little ones, sadly no longer with us.

With all that said, if you aren't comfortable, you need to intervene.

Ewwwww that’s really weird. And the bum smacking too. Yuck. You definitely need to stop both of these OP.

So why didn’t you say anything if it really bothers you? If you are expecting him to speak up for himself when you don’t speak up for him it’s a confusing message and he’s far more likely to just decide he ‘doesn’t mind it’ to avoid confrontation, as that’s what you are teaching him. It’s a lot easier to put your parents straight than other adults

See this is where it’s a little complex, I know he didn’t mind it - I could tell and I even asked him afterwards. I said you can tell anyone at anytime to not touch you, including me and your dad (he is 7 so a little older) and knew immediately what I was referring to and said he didn’t mind it.
I was uncomfortable with it though. So maybe I am being unreasonable. He’s never been an affectionate kid other than with me and his dad (he is very affectionate with us!) so I was surprised he didn’t mind it!

@WhereIsMyJumper needs to say it, it shouldn't be up to the child.

Put in a Sarah’s Law application for added peace of mind, but in the meantime trust your gut instinct

Excellent advice.

It its giving you horrible icky feelings then they've overstepped the mark.
Whenever they do anything like that just physically remove child from them and keep close to you. If they continue then minimise contact as much as necessary.

You could say she tried to do it to a nursery worker and they mentioned it was inappropriate so you’re trying to get her to stop doing it to anyone.

I don’t think anybody should be doing this.

I misread the OP and thought it was a grandparent doing it on a child when playing together, and thought it’s quite an overreaction on this thread. Then I re-read and it made me feel very uncomfortable. Even with a related grandparent it feels very very off.

Urgh that's sounds creepy as fuck.

Seems like potentially grooming...

Can’t your child tell her he doesn’t like it?

That different, they are your kids and you were blowing raspberries on them, totally normal. This is a 3 year old blowing raspberries on a grown adults bare belly, the two don’t compare so don’t worry about that.