To despise picky eaters?

I've several issues with food.

My mum ended up hating cooking because my father made her do it for lots of people because he liked being a host doing entertaining. Once she'd got rid of him I grew up on ready meals because the whole thing had traumatised her. I then developed bulimia at 13 when my gran died. Then I married a psychologically abusive man who used food as a means to make me out to be ungrateful and mentally ill. I then developed physical problems which makes it difficult for me to swallow food. And now I'm quite neurotic about food which I hate.

I avoid social occasions where food is involved because I've no desire to explain myself or have judgemental people think I'm being difficult for the sake of it.

So to all those who would accept good reasons, why do you think people should explain themselves to you, can you not just accept they don't want to eat certain things and otherwise leave them alone?

Tbh your comment about sex life weird and rude 🤷🏼‍♀️

And the comment which prompted the ‘yes..and’ response was just me following up on your post about being taught it was rude not to eat food that had been made for you and that as you have no psychological issues that’s not a problem for you.

I was only saying that you should be mindful that many people won’t tell you they have psychological issues so don’t make assumptions!
Just let people be!

Sorry, I think you have me mixed up with someone else. Please show me one place where I have been rude or accusative about selective eaters.

And what?
Dont you want people to at least feel ok? Especially if you are hosting them?

Sorry, I think you have me mixed up with someone else. Please show me one place where I have been rude or accusative about selective eaters.

Saying ‘yes, and?’ is rude as hell when someone is being vulnerable about ED.

Yes, and..?

ARFID here too.

I wish I could be one of those folks who are totally insensitive to flavour or texture and so can eat anything put in front of them. It must be absolutely wonderful, eat whatever there is, never go hungry and get to be smug and twattish to anyone who can't do that.

Brilliant - do enjoy OP.

Sorry, I think you have me mixed up with someone else. Please show me one place where I have been rude or accusative about selective eaters.

stop being so rude and accusative about people who are selective eaters

Yes, and..?

@Brownoliveskincurlyblackhair I get it!

My dm made a beautiful table up once with candles and other stuff her bil walked in and said he hated candles and turned all the lights on
Then proceeded to say what food he did and didn't like.

There should be a middle ground however that you as host do two options at least and guest also falls in as much as possible.

I think you need to be mindful of the fact that you often don’t know if someone has psychological issues or an eating disorder such as ARFID.
We don’t shout about it, we don’t even want it acknowledged. I’m deeply embarrassed by my eating disorder and it can cause me a lot of anxiety and most of the anxiety comes from other people commenting on my food.
If I was just left alone and my food choices not even commented on, I’d be a lot less stressed at social occasions involving food.

Why is it a stupid suggestion? You said you'd eat anything, and dog meat soup is quite common in some Asian countries.

You seem repulsed by the idea - maybe take a minute to realise that that repulsion is what some people feel when faced with relatively "normal" foods and try and have some sympathy.

I definitely am not someone who won't tolerate fussy eaters, but I would absolutely eat anything that someone had made me.

I was taught it was rude not to and I have no physical or psychological aversions which would stop me.

Absolutely anything.

No, I wouldn't eat "dog meat soup". What a stupid suggestion.

I have eaten insects plenty of times.

So you'd eat dog meat soup? Cockroaches? Spiders legs?

I used to be irritated by fussy eaters. Until I had one myself. My youngest has struggled with food since I started weaning him. His older brother was and is a great eater, with just a small number of dislikes that are texture related, such as mashed potato and mousse. But DS2’s desire to eat only certain foods is very strong. He would eat nothing all day rather than eat what he doesn’t like. And I mean all day. He likes food that is consistent. All the boring stuff that never changes. If something on his plate is slightly different to the usual - eg a bit burnt, a bit mushy - he won’t eat it again and thus the range of food he is prepared to eat reduces. And my heart sinks. He now has severe OCD and the problem has increased tenfold, a hundredfold. He is extremely thin, despite the fact that his safe foods are calorie laden. If most people on here saw his diet, they would faint with the shock. Or get very angry, which sadly seems to be one of the default reactions to people who are different to themselves. Anyway, all of this has made me much more tolerant and understanding of so called ‘fussy eaters’. Most of the time, other people’s preferences have no impact on my life, except for the odd gathering of family and friends. Most people aren’t trying to make other people’s lives worse. They just are who they are.

I definitely am not someone who won't tolerate fussy eaters, but I would absolutely eat anything that someone had made me.

I was taught it was rude not to and I have no physical or psychological aversions which would stop me.

Absolutely anything.

So all the people who despise or won’t tolerate fussy eaters….would you genuinely eat anything that someone cooked or made for you, absolutely anything?

I eat most things but am prone to getting aversions about food if I think about it too much, ie my dd was describing why she doesn’t like tomato’s and I had to ask her to stop or I would start seeing all the bad things about tomatoes - even typing that makes me feel sick 😂 so I totally understand, even though I fight it