Where are the trans men?

There are loads of trans men and boys about (and a whole lot of girls and women who identify as non-binary). We probably don’t hear or see as much about them as they don’t tend to try and dominate men’s spaces, nor do they turn up at women’s events and spray piss around to intimidate women. They tend to have a very different profile to the middle aged men that identify as women. Their motivations for ‘transitioning’ tend to be quite different too.

So you...do know they exist?

So the "where ARE they" bullshit angle was a thinly veiled way to bash transwomen disguised as faux innocence

Again.

I don't really know what you mean. They exist. Is it just that you haven't met any?

I think girls are certainly rushing. Adolescent girls vastly outnumber boys at gender clinics. Dr Hilary Cass:

"“So about 15 years ago, the service was seeing perhaps 50 predominantly birth registered boys in childhood. And over the last 10 years or so it’s switched to over 3,000 young people, and it’s mainly birth-registered girls presenting in early teens … often with quite complex additional problems.”

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2024/apr/10/what-cass-review-says-about-surge-in-children-seeking-gender-services

I can't find figures for over 18s presenting at adult gender identity clinics for the first time. Maybe someone else can help.

Anecdotally, in my own cultural (music/art) circles, there's a lot of female they/thems. I suspect they feel it gives them greater authority and respect than being a boring female. I know a couple of female he/hims with mastectomies taking T. I find the performative masculinity tiresome, but it's early days and they may settle into it and become less extreme. I try to think of them as adolescent boys finding their feet - even though some of the observations they make, about the differences between men and women, sound like a 1970s observational comic.

Privately, I have quite a visceral reaction to what they've done, as I feel they've identified out of womanhood because of internalised misogyny and ageism, and possibly autism. But better a reborn Peter Pan than a menopausal hag, eh?

This

Most trans women are also quiet about it and want to blend in, obviously you only hear and notice the loud ones and then stereotype them all based on that.

I know one very well, a couple slightly and know of several more (via a game site, they feel safe there to 'be themselves').

They are absolutely around but, as women, they haven't grown up with the male entitlement that a lot of transwomen seem to have renouncing so are entirely nicer to be around.

I also know two. One had surgery quite young.

Females in general don't pose a risk to males.
Males do pose a risk to females.
That's why the political discussion focuses on men in women's spaces and not the other way around.

I think they are, it’s just they 1) aren’t a physical threat to men; 2) aren’t stealing medals and awards from men; 3) aren’t as threatening and spiteful as TIMs when they don’t get their way or when boundaries are asserted. So, they just don’t draw attention to themselves. In short, women who identify as men quietly go about their business with less harmful impact on men or women. On the other hand, men who identify as women commit crimes at the same rate as men, are in jail for proportionally more sex offences than non-trans men and never stop demanding more and more access to everything including cervical smears and women’s health meet ups in libraries. So, trans identifying women don’t bother most of us in the slightest. It’s the men letting everyone down with their behaviour.

There are also trans men. I know 2. But no one is getting upset about their existence. I guess they are seen as posing no risk to anyone. Men aren't threatened by them. Women don't care. Meanwhile some seem to think trans women pose a risk to other women. And I guess some men fear they might accidently fancy someone who was a man.

Anyway, all in all, no one is making a lot of noise about them and they are just busy existing.

They are. I know three

Well I know two personally so they do exist.