that this report card comment can be misconstrued

I’m afraid I agree with the posters who have said that 11 or 12 o clock is far too late for your dd to be coming off the internet and trying to sleep, @cyclops123. She needs at least an hour away from screens to be able to settle down for good, restful sleep, so if she is coming off the internet at midnight, she won’t be getting into good sleep before 1am.

I would suggest she needs to come off screens by 9pm, and then can read or listen to audiobooks for a while, with the aim of being asleep by 10pm.

Can she start doing her homework earlier? It shouldn't be taking her until 11 or 12 at night - are you SURE that's what she's doing?

Although I do agree with a PP, you can make them go to bed but you can't make them sleep - I had a DD who would sit up and read half the night; she just wasn't tired (diagnosed with AuDHD as an adult).

You let her stay up til midnight and moan she's eating badly at school.
But now you're upset school have put that in writing.
I get you are at war with your DH. And I've been on the receiving end of you're not looking after her comments from my ex.
But you need to reframe your vision here. This isn't a statement to attack you but one to reinforce your parenting.
You do need to step up and stop her late nights.

Retired HT here and I'd go crackers if a teacher had written that on one of my own children's reports. I would insist that the report is rewritten so that it couldn't be used against you in your divorce. I suggest something like:
" Key for DD to succeed will be for her to focus on improving her concentration in lessons."

I'd approach the teacher who wrote it and say that you feel he/she could have spoken to you privately if they had a concern. To put it on a report card like that is not encouraging or helpful - it's judgemental and thoughtless...and a little high-handed.

She’s 12! Take away the device at night ffs! It’s parenting. Take it away at 8 and you will find she sleeps better

I am actually also pissed off with schools food, they have a bakery, a street food hut and a canteen.
My son will eat a pan au chocolate for break, then chips, lunch might eat another bakery item and maybe the main meal.
I dont know why they sell crappy food as a kid in a sweetshop is not going to choose the carrots.

I would ask for a meeting and discuss this, but my first thought would be that the teacher(s) observed what seemed to be a chronic lack of energy and general lethargy, and perhaps spoke with your daughter and got the impression she wasn't eating. That seems more likely than that she's regularly eating junk food in class. Do any of the other comments seem unusual or give more context? Also, do you know if the comments on the report are freeform (teacher may phrase however they think best) or selected from preset choices? If it's the latter, that may account for it not seeming quite on target to your daughter's situation.

My 11 year old has everything off and is settling for bed between 9 and 10 depending on what is going on that night

He doesnt have to get up until 7.30 either and hes still tired.
11 or 12 is really late.

That she is borderline neglected. Teacher may be laying it on a bit thick but good for them. Food and sleep is pretty basic stuff.

Or it's just a standard line they are chucking in reports

I actually think I would ask to meet eith thr school to discuss it. I would be really affronted but also concerned that the achool are picking up things that I am not.
Maybe eating crap all day, or nothing at all, sleeping in class, why. I would ask to meet eith them and try to figure out what propelled them to write this?

Is she maybe having a bit of an afternoon slump at school if she's not being eating particularly well at lunch?

Why can't you control what she eats at school? Is she on free school meals?

If not then send her in with a packed lunch and don't put money on her account. We had to stop letting DS eat at school as all he would eat was pizza and chips. He's 14 and now only ever takes a packed lunch as he wouldn't eat any of the healthy options at school. He could buy food from the shop on the way to school but doesn't get a huge amount of pocket money so that wouldn't be much if he did that.

Sorry OP but you seem pretty nonchalant about your 12 year old stay up until midnight ok screens on a school night and falling asleep in class. This isn’t okay nor is it acceptable. And then like it’s okay you email the teacher when your kid sleep late - because they eill be tired (so you already know this) or your kid will be late for school (which isn’t okay).

Don’t blame the comment or report - spend your energy on getting your kid to bed at a good time and making sure they are healthy.

If the teacher sees her making poor choices of food at school, then that makes sense...the comment didn't pass judgement on you did it or suggest she eats poorly at home.

Falling asleep during the day and poor sleep at night can be linked to poor diet . It’s linked by blood sugar rises and crashes due to too many carbs etc. different people tolerate different amounts of carbs.

But - for example - if they see her eating sweets and bouncing around and then crashing asleep they may feel her diet in school is poor - and they won’t know what goes on at home.

My advice is to contact them and work with them. Ultimately you all want the best for DD and DD may try harder if she knows all the adults are singing from the same hymn book.

So she’s sleeping in and being late ? That explains the comment

I wouldn't try to pick apart each aspect of the comment... instead I'd take it as an overall recommendation to focus on wellbeing and a healthy lifestyle.

OP, your dd's teachers can only go on what they see.

If she is falling asleep in class, not eating her lunch. lacking energy and constantly poorly with no other reason, expressing concerns about her health and tiredness is reasonable.

Do you ensure all devices are downstairs or in your room on charge overnight, so she gets enough sleep? Does she eat a balanced diet? Avoid fizzy/caffeine drinks? Is she generally healthy or does she have a stream of coughs and colds? Is she significantly over or under weight?

I'd go back to the teacher, take a deep breath and ask her what are her specific concerns.

I have a super skinny ds. I was asked once whether he was eating properly. I provided details of his diet, pointed out that his red book tracked normal growth and that was the end of the conversation.

It's better than learning about an eating disorder after it has already caused harm

So basically you just wanted them to be clear they weren’t blaming you for the poor nutrition?

I don't really see how it could be misconstrued, no.

If she's not eating healthy food at lunch at school who's responsibility is it to feed her at school? If she's eating school lunches then obviously that's their purview. If she doesn't eat school lunches then whoever is packing her lunch would be responsible.

You seem kind of nonchalant about the falling asleep in class; what exactly is causing that? You said you turn off the Wi-Fi so she shouldn't have access to the internet at night. Is she staying up all nigh