My boyfriend is going back and forth with his ex fling.

regardless of what feelings he has, he is been awful to his ex and awful to you. He is not a nice man- you can do better if you put up with this now it will set a standard and it wont get better. This only future of this relationship is constant hurt feeling for you. End it without hesitation, he will tell you he has not feeling for her because he is messing with your head, and hers by the sound of it

Look at how this man boosts his ego and run for the hills. It'll be you on the receiving end of his ego boosts one day.

At your emotional expense.
Dump him. He's either yo-yo-ing or he's just a cock.

It doesn’t matter why. Stop focusing on whether he feels anything for her and start thinking about how he’s treating you. You keep asking if people think he has feelings for her, what does it matter, he’s still treating you like crap.

Why are you so hung up on whether he has feelings for her? Wondering why he is acting this way, why she is acting this way etc etc. All you need to know is that he is disrespecting you and your relationship, that's it. Just dump him, he sounds like a right twat.

Read your update OP. Great decision to dump!

How you’re going to get through this? Let the feelings wash over you. You may be angry or sad sometimes but that will come and go and gradually get less. Just let it happen

And distract is always a good tactic. Someone earlier said get dressed up, gather some friends and and meet someone new. That’s also what I found works best.

Or get yourself a hobby, travel, new job, volunteer etc.

Basically throw yourself into life

Op he is mean to you too ffs !

He is mean because she is a dick and he treats women like toys .
This isn’t about wether he likes you better or wether he loves her. He’s playing games with you both . Only perils he cares about is himself .

You can see the way he is speaking to her and you still want to be with him. He is a pig .

Based on what you've said I think it's very clear he does have feelings for her. He's mean to her because he's 'negging' - a thing shitty men do where they deliberately undermine the confidence of women they are interested in, in the hope that the woman in question will try and prove him wrong by trying to get his attention and interest. He is manipulating his ex into giving him attention by pretending she means nothing to him so that she keeps trying to prove him wrong.

But I think it's important to state that even if he didn't have feelings for her, his behaviour would still be despicable because it shows he doesn't care about you at all. He is completely disrespecting you in order to get attention from somebody else. A person who does that could never put you first or stand up for you. You would always be someone he would keep around for the convenience of having a girlfriend, but drop when the opportunity of attention from someone else came along.

I'm very glad you're going to break up with him. You are so young, and this relationship has only been going on for six months. You would be crazy to throw your beautiful youth away on a man who doesn't like, love or respect you, who is virtually guaranteed to cheat, and who would always make you anxious and paranoid.

I’d move on. If best case it is just an ego thing, you don’t want to be living on edge waiting to see if this man needs another ego boost from someone else. If he’s not into the ex then he’s actually being pretty unkind stringing her along to boost his ego. None of this is attractive.

He sounds delightful. Not.

Run fast. You’re worth more than this 14 year old boy-man.

And what does that tell you about him? That your relationship is not enough for him, he needs an external ego boost. I'd be dumping him.

He sounds immature.
You are only 25, get out of his mess and move on. With someone more mature.

whatever it is ego boost or feelings for her. It doesn’t matter.

The outcome is the same and it’s not looking good for you as you’re there chasing and obsessing. Basically you’re the one with ‘more’ feelings and that’s not the best position to be in

Cone on now.

You're 25. There's loads of time to meet a decent man and even if you never do, being single is far better than putting up with this crap from an immature, disrespectful, idiot.

You don't know how you are going to get through this? It's been six months. You were doing fine before you met him snd you'll do fine again afterwards. He's been a waste of your time but a lesson in what you are no longer willing to accept.

A better question to ask yourself is what do I want in a partner and what are your immediate deal breakers - start with maturity, respect, kindness, honesty etc.

Figure out what is causing you to accept his behaviour so far and what's going to help you not repeat the same mistakes again.

He's not worth a minute more of your time.

He's absolutely awful.
I'm going to take this at face value and assume that you aren't actually the ex and that you aren't just on a wind up. Dump this fucker. You can see from the way he is behaving with his ex that if you and he were to split up, he'd behave in exactly the same way and that will trash your self-esteem in no time.

He's clearly a man child and enjoys the attention this girl brings, if she offers it up on a plate do you really think he will say no? Of course he won't.
Dump him and leave him to it.

Have you never heard of treat them mean, keep them keen?
They are playing games with each other, shes teasing him, he does like it but is coming across as mean as he thinks it gives him the power!!

Listen to us when we say this stupid little fuck boy is not worth your attention!! Dump him, do better, know your worth!!!

End it before he ends it. You’re only 25, and he sounds mentally 16. Get out OP, and enjoy the next few years of meeting lovely men!

Well done - end it today, don’t wait!
You’ll get through by remembering he’s a dickhead who showed you no respect.
Block him on a channels so he can’t weasel his way back in. Onwards and upwards! 👍🏻

You will be fine! You are worth more than being second best. He’s not for you & sounds like a bit of an immature wet blanket.

I don’t think he’s “your man” then. 6 months in & frequent contact with ex? Check that you’re not the “rebound” or that he is at least ready for a new relationship. (Don’t check that with him - have a think yourself about what you are willing to put up with, want from the relationship etc. 6 months are not long and the “honeymoon period”, so these things would be red flags to me, I’m afraid)

Well he’s clearly interested in something otherwise why is he engaging with her.

Why are you giving him & this so much headspace, and not just showing him the door? He is not treating you well.

Tell him to come back when he’s grown up.

I’m pretty sure it’s not ‘another poster’

The endless threads ignoring all comments and just asking ‘but why’ been done on repeat