Head teacher is a ****

You dont need to make a SAR anyway.

If the HT said they would send the record to you, they should have done it. The record should have been contemporaneous (recorded at the time the child made the allegation and the school made a decision not to refer to SS).
I would be very alarmed that the children had been questioned again with no real grounds for it (no bruising or physical marks on the child) (child hadnt reported anything), and that this had happened particularly only after you had made a complaint.

Never mind parenting not being for the weak, neither is posting on mumsnet!

Dont let them get you down about your very young child telling one lie. They readily admitted what happened later... As a child of 6, I was pinched and played a trick on by an older child (she was only 10). I thought it was funny and copied her, and played the trick on a younger child who took it very badly. Got into terrible trouble but have never forgotten it. All part of the learning curve.
Before you do a formal complaint, it might be wise to just ask casually why the children were questioned (did something happen at school, were there further concerns and what triggered them) and see what response you get. Remind the head, by the way, you still havent had the report you were promised on dd, mm, yy. Ask when you can expect it.

This is awful. I hope your daughter is in therapy now…did she explain why she did such a thing??

The normal protocol in my LA and most is to take the allegation and action before speaking to parent purely because it could put child in danger if it was true and parent was told.

so I suppose she did right thing there, however I have a autistic child whose now 10 who misinterprets everything so she told school priest slapped her head at mass(catholic achool) he didn’t he patted her head in a blessing, she also told hospital that teachers pushed he off climbing frame when she was helped down and broke her arm(they showed CCTV) some kids are very sensitive to touch but 100% little one needs to be spoken to about truth and how telling truth never gets you in trouble lots of praise for telling the truth etc.

HT sounds like a gremlin but I wouldn’t rock the boat as she now seems to have an issue with you.

hipe you ok not nice situarion

My DD told staff I punched her in the face and they immediately reported me to SS.
I work at a separate school so had to declare, so was suspended straight away. We also respite foster so that all had to be cancelled- it was horrendous.
DD admitted on the same day that I hadn’t punched her at all, never mind in the face, but still they said SS has to investigate.
It was last year and I’m still not over it.

Formal complaint in writing to Chair of Governors and CC Head of Education to boot. Awful behaviour xx

Well you said all the teachers are wonderful yet you’re blaming the HD a for the mess up with the packed lunches. You weren’t there, took your friend’s word as gospel, said friend didn’t do anything to help get the kids food neither did the other teachers or parents who were around but somehow this is all the HD fault. You don’t seem overly concerned that 20 children didn’t have food including your kids and no one did anything to help the situation, teachers and parents. Odd.

Why didn’t you ask the school why the kids didn’t get a packed lunch?

This is from your post when op says she asked the school about her kids not getting lunch.

I realise from another post you just went by what someone told you. I would be asking the teachers yourself what happened before putting in the complaint, as it could’ve been something on your end if they never received it.

You need to read properly before you blame op.

Sadly my experience of safeguarding is some referrals are made incorrectly and sometimes are vexticious. And this is with so-called safeguarding leads. Log everything OP, even if it’s retrospectively. Talk with your kids and write down exactly what they say. Ensure all comms written down moving forward and yes I would absolutely escalate this.

Next day at school one child tried to ask the headteacher about it in assembly, and wanted to know what a pedo was. We were told not to ever mention that teacher's name at school again. And that was that. Swept under the rug.

You honestly think the right place to have a discussion about a sexually abusive teacher is in a primary school assembly?

But please get your son some help.

Could there have been a glitch in the system maybe? On their end?

I would still be complaining anyway. You filled in the forms on your end.

Firstly- your son needs help. Making up these sorts of allegations is not normal. Pretending your mother punched you and telling the teacher is just crazy.

RE the pack lunches, your son may have forgotten to hand the forms in. The teachers have a limited budget and dont make extra lunches plus have to be aware of any allergies. I would send your kids in with pack lunches next sports day. If he did hand forms in you have a right to complain to the school.

HT probably informed you they may have to inform SS as a prior warning. They are obliged to give the bad upfront news first.

All schools in England are legally required to have a published complaints procedure. It’ll be there, you’ve just not found it yet.

But there were many teachers present and parents around, like ops friend who knew the kids had no food and didn’t do anything. So even if the teachers didn’t do anything, which I find highly unlikely why didn’t the parents that knew do something? Easy to blame the teachers that stood by and watched but where is the blame for them parents that did the exact same thing?

I hate this bloody line.

The first one imo is fair enough, though it depends how it was said. I'm a mental health nurse, and if a patient with dementia, for example, told me their spouse hit them (which obviously isn't always true with dementia) I would have to advise that I'd be passing the concerns on to social services, though I usually explain it from the point of view that it's about making sure everyone is safe and that I have a statutory duty. People should be told about safeguarding if safe to do so, but also it doesn't matter what the alleged perpetrator has to say sometimes, because professionals are mandated reporters when it comes to vulnerable adults and children. You are though of course entitled to request the notes from the investigation.

The sports day thing obviously sounds ridiculous and sounds like a case of the head not wanting to take accountability for a fuck up.

I agree - but my comment was in response to the disbelief that a school could let 20 kids go hungry, and that it simply wouldn't happen because at least one teacher would have spoken up.

It's true that the safeguarding procedures need to be followed, but the way the school is handling it, coupled with the lunch incident, is a bit of a red flag. If I was OP I would keep a record of everything in writing and make sure both issues are dealt with properly and not just swept under the rug.

But the 90s are very different to regulations now. It was over 30 years ago. I understand teaching your kids to look out for behaviours that you were exposed too but it’s not as easy to get away with this bad behaviour unlike it was 30 years ago. Hence the HD calling a meeting about safeguarding.