Asking if you took a Ukrainian guest in your home why you want them gone asap?

Autocorrect! I meant irrelevant! 🤣🤣

"Irreverent" is a bit steep; I'm sure it's just ignorance. But yes, yet another drop and run. Maybe there should be a rule that you can't start a thread until you've posted on others at least, say, ten or fifteen times.

I think the idea of helping a Ukrainian (or any other) refugee is very different from the reality, it seems like a really good charitable thing to to, but having any house guest can get difficult and someone from a different culture maybe with not very good English could become very difficult quite quickly, particularly if the host isn't well off and has to provide everything. They may be quite desperate for the guest to start contributing financially.

I know someone married to a Ukrainian and their Ukrainian MIL, BIL and his wife, have been staying for some time due to the war and even that is not plain sailing!

Councils were pushing families to push their guests and £300 a month is basically the lowest rate for a room without any bills included.

People opened their homes with their hearts but really it cost a lot of money them.

Any job is better than no job and especially if there was ever plans to move into your own independent housing that job needs to come asap to build up the funds and prove you could hold down the job for the rental.

It's all pretty irreverent anyway since the OP seems to have tapped the fish tank and rushed off giggling.

But @tuvamoodyson was just explaining why the OP might have used it.

I'm sure they don't actually think English and British mean the exact same thing.

In Ireland there is a lot of bitterness too, as many Ukrainian people are out earning the locals, while living in hotel accommodation, no heating or electric bills, food allowance and full benefits if unemployed.

Plus the councils pushed 1000s to the top of the housing list, the backlash stopped this, but 100's if not more properties were allocated.

Culturally people from Ukraine are more direct, it can come across as abrupt.

I'm sorry you had a bad experience, surely 3 year's later, you were re-homed

And again...

I was replying to tuvamoodyson, not the OP.

I think a lot of people saw what was happening and wanted to help out in an emergency situation by offering emergency accommodation. It was never supposed to be a “as long as it takes” arrangement, it was support to find your feet in the UK and help with practical things like getting children into school or to register with a doctor . A Ukrainian with a good level of spoken/written English may well be able to find a job in a week.

All of this.

I mean this is the best way- but it’s been 3 and a half years since Putin invaded. It’s not a long term solution to live in another persons home. I would expect you have sorted something or accommodation for yourself out by now. And nothing wrong with taking any job- we have to do that? I wouldn’t rely on other people funding me or my family. The idea is a refuge whilst you get help , jobs, homes etc

I think you are quibbling unnecessarily when the intent of the post is clear. It is hardly likely that the OP meant to add “of course the Welsh and Scots were fantastic and I am just singling out English people”. Allow some latitude for language differences and also speaking on an informal forum rather than getting cross and derailing

I was replying to tuvamoodyson, not the OP 🙄

Yeah not the second they arrive though. Can you not imagine how traumatic it must of been having to leave your home, move country with a different language and leave you husband and sons etc to fight in a war.

Good attempt at pidgin English @Anhelina2000xx . 7/10 as just a bit too obvious.

Well, if you're seriously going to get arsey over a Ukrainian person erroneously substituting "English" for "British", I'm afraid I've got news for you. It happens all the time. Don't expect everyone in the rest of the world, or even Europe, to be knowledgeable of the difference. You'll be waiting a long time if you do.

I'd say it is a personality clash.
A lot of people reacted with their heart, not their head.
I know a few families who hosted for months, others cannot afford to keep up with the expenses.

Bloody hell give her a break she's not from here and English isnt her first language

We had a family stay with us for 12 months (the government asks hosts to take guests for at least six months), though we didn’t ask them to leave. They just became independent and obviously wanted their own place. We consider them family now, we love them and still see them every week. I never put pressure on our guest to find work straight away because she was very traumatised but it was difficult to get the jobcentre to understand this.

But in answer to your question here are a few things to remember:

Most hosts did this out of the goodness of their hearts and discovered that it costs a lot more than the £300 a month from the government to keep an extra family.

The local council puts pressure on hosts to encourage independence in guests. In the UK people are not allowed to just sit round and not work. If they do, the government will stop their benefits. The amount of benefits that are paid is small, not enough for a good life. People are much better off going to work.

In the UK we have a housing crisis. There are not enough homes for the number of people and housing is VERY expensive. Your host understands that if you want to find somewhere to live in the future you will need to have saved a lot of money. Our guest had to pay £6000 to get a small flat (six months rent up front as she had no credit history in the UK). Your host will need to encourage you to do this, and the council will check regularly that they are doing it.

Some Ukrainians have expected to get houses from the council but unfortunately in most areas these no longer exist. If no plans or savings have been made, it is a big problem for the council and they want to make sure that doesn’t happen, so they put a lot of pressure on hosts to make sure guests are working and saving.

So you need to be thinking of the future and start planning as early as possible, or you will have no chance of ever living independently. Do not think that it’s because hosts don’t want you. Remember that they understand the UK and know how things work much better than you do! I understand it must feel like they are trying to push you but it genuinely isn’t done with bad feeling. We all want what is best for you until it is safe for you to return home. слава Україні 💙💛

I had a family with me for 5 months. They did get jobs within about 3 months and moved into a private rental near us. Three years later they are settled, we see them regularly and they seem to feel grateful for what we did
I took advice from a psychiatrist who was an expert in PTSD in refugees from war zones who I met through a contact. He said the best thing to do was to move quickly towards a new normal and routine which involves the child at school, parents working and able to be financially independent. They aren’t doing the professional jobs they did as language is a barrier but will never go back I think as their home is now part of Russian Federation
I am sorry if you have had a bad experience. But I thought we needed to plan for how the hosting ended right from the start and gave them every help to find jobs and a home. I didn’t want them to feel rejected and unwelcome and I think eventually these arrangements can end that way if there is no plan.

A young and fit refugee should surely be prepared to work to help with the extra expense incurred by the family and no one is going to walk into a good job easily.

English is not shorthand for British.

Scotland has definitely taken in Ukrainian people. I imagine Wales and NI too.

Also, the family who wanted you out after a week are the only ones who will know the reason why.

Did they or the authorities really not tell you the reason?

Perhaps, OP meant English as in British…