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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think getting a job is impossible for some?

114 replies

stuckinthemuddiestwaters · 25/06/2025 06:51

Two years of looking. Many applications. Two recent interviews. Second choice for both, so did not get a job offer. Had good feedback, but you don’t know what they are really thinking about you.

I have plenty of experience and also promotions at previous workplaces.

AIBU to think I am unemployable?

OP posts:
stuckinthemuddiestwaters · 25/06/2025 09:52

To answer some of the questions:

I was off work for a couple of years as a SAHM, then did a contract job, which finished two years ago, and haven't found anything since.

Yes, I am looking for part-time role, because I can't manage a full-time role with the DC being the ages they are and a heath condition I have (the condition is not outwardly obvious to employers and doesn't affect my work). I do know that some people have no choice but to work full-time, and recognise this is a privilege. I also recognise that part-time limits my options. However, I do have a good degree of flexibility as to how many hours, and I can be physically present at work. It doesn't have to be WFH.

I am seeking office-based work, but don't want to disclose the field I am in, as it may be outing.

I appreciate all the feedback and suggestions. I will work through them and see what I can do to improve my chances.

Overall, I think it is just really disheartening. We do need some extra income, and I feel guilty that I am not contributing to the family unit economically.

OP posts:
ilovesooty · 25/06/2025 09:30

stuckinthemuddiestwaters · 25/06/2025 07:11

Sorry, I am just a bit down in the dumps and wondering if there is something wrong with me that I can't find work. I rationally know that the economic situation is playing a large part, but emotionally it is difficult to deal with.

I hope you're successful soon. You're understandably downheartened by this experience.

tumblingdowntherabbithole · 25/06/2025 09:28

Middlechild3 · 25/06/2025 09:10

This, I think we need to be very flexible over hours, contracts, locations, WFH etc, don't have too rigid a set of requirements. I think also sometimes you need to take the work at hand, casual work which may be far below your skillset just to stay in 'work mode'.

Totally with you - so many people refuse to even consider certain roles because they don’t want to do weekends or shifts or use childcare!

CanoeWaveMasterof · 25/06/2025 09:27

Have you been unemployed for 2 years ?

There are loads of volunteer opportunities, have you been volunteering ?
If not why not ?

Have you been applying for PT & FT jobs ?

WhatNoRaisins · 25/06/2025 09:12

I think the job hunting process can make some people unemployable as it's such a depressing slog. I can easily see how a person struggling with their mental health might be able to do a few weeks of tweaking CVs and sending applications that they don't hear back from and then not be able to face it again for a while.

Middlechild3 · 25/06/2025 09:10

tumblingdowntherabbithole · 25/06/2025 08:27

This might not be popular but I think a lot of people are going to have to readjust their expectations when it comes to finding a job.

I’m not saying this is the OP, but I see far too many threads from people who won’t even consider applying for jobs unless they come with certain benefits or conditions and it just seems so unrealistic.

The job market has changed and we need to change our expectations too.

This, I think we need to be very flexible over hours, contracts, locations, WFH etc, don't have too rigid a set of requirements. I think also sometimes you need to take the work at hand, casual work which may be far below your skillset just to stay in 'work mode'.

tumblingdowntherabbithole · 25/06/2025 09:07

Vacancies are in very specific sectors which not everyone is suited to

I’m not sure I agree that people aren’t suited, I think it’s that a lot of people have the attitude of being too “good” for certain jobs - they don’t think they should have to work shifts, or weekends, or full-time in an office. They don’t want to do care work, or retail, or hospitality, or work in a warehouse. Everyone wants a nice WFH or hybrid job where you can be home for deliveries or school runs, where you can disappear to walk the dog or to take in a delivery - and it’s just never going to be the case that everyone can do a job like that.

People are going to have to adjust their expectations.

Hufflemuff · 25/06/2025 08:56

No offence, but there is clearly something off putting. Ive never interviewed a cleaner, who didn't get the job (as long as they had a clean criminal record).

Samesame47 · 25/06/2025 08:55

Finding a job is easy, finding a job you want is admittedly more difficult. I used to work in recruitment, the fact that your not working now would be a red flag for me,
any job (even if just a stop gap) is better than no job. My daughter started working at 15, she decided she wanted a job and got one the same day by calling into shops in town, she then wanted more hours at 16 so popped into a couple of restaurants, had a trial shift that day, she’s now 17 and no longer wanted to work Friday and Saturday nights as her social life is getting busy so again she went out to find a job that suited her more again it took her a day. We live in a small village on the edge of a little market down, finding some form of work is not hard if you put the effort it. Explaining gaps of your CV without a very good reason is never easy, I would say do anything for now whilst looking for something more long term. Best of luck and I’m not trying to sound harsh I just know the sort of thing that would put me off a candidate even if they were strong in other areas

Fearfulsaints · 25/06/2025 08:40

I think some people are unemployable due to health issues mainly.

But of the people who could work and who are employable, i think there are more people looking for work than there are jobs. Vacancies are in very specific sectors which not everyone is suited to

I've seen lots about nurses finishing thier degrees and finding a recruitment freeze for instance. This is a role I never thought would be difficult to secure.

Breadcat24 · 25/06/2025 08:38

Sorry about your situation, it can be very depressing. Is there anything here we can do to help? Can you say sector or type of job ( eg systems administrator) without giving too much away so people could suggest things to bolster your applications?
Also are you using all the search tools you can- not just Indeed but Linkedin etc

BunnyLake · 25/06/2025 08:33

Butchyrestingface · 25/06/2025 07:03

I saw that yesterday. Absolutely horrendous.

I applied for a job on Indeed and about two minutes later got a notification saying I hadn’t been selected to progress any further. I think it just fell into a black hole unseen.

PollyBell · 25/06/2025 08:32

This may not be the op but if people have the attitude of being a permanent victim they will hardly get a job of it comes across like that, again not sure of the op does this or not

Swiftie1878 · 25/06/2025 08:30

stuckinthemuddiestwaters · 25/06/2025 07:11

Sorry, I am just a bit down in the dumps and wondering if there is something wrong with me that I can't find work. I rationally know that the economic situation is playing a large part, but emotionally it is difficult to deal with.

Are you looking for some sort of ‘holy grail’ job?
Perhaps open your mind to different options, even if they are just transition jobs to get you back into a routine of work. You meet lots of people and get to see lots of opportunities through being IN work (of any kind).

tumblingdowntherabbithole · 25/06/2025 08:27

This might not be popular but I think a lot of people are going to have to readjust their expectations when it comes to finding a job.

I’m not saying this is the OP, but I see far too many threads from people who won’t even consider applying for jobs unless they come with certain benefits or conditions and it just seems so unrealistic.

The job market has changed and we need to change our expectations too.

PinkyBear · 25/06/2025 08:19

@stuckinthemuddiestwaters as PPs have said the job market is really tricky at the moment. But there are still roles out there. And you got to the final 2 for those roles, so you are doing something right. Did you ask for, and get constructive feedback from these interviews? Are you signed up with agencies? Is your CV AI suitable? (ie if companies use AI filtering will yours get through - Google this). Are you applying directly with companies? Looking on job sites too?
Good luck.

HonestOpalHelper · 25/06/2025 08:09

Whaleandsnail6 · 25/06/2025 07:11

I think if someone is able to work at any time and do anything, with their own transport, then getting a job is actually easy.

I live in the Midlands and I could go on indeed now and get work to start next week in a warehouse...in fact I did this last year as temporary work whilst waiting to start another job.

Also, if I wanted to work as a carer, I could pretty much walk into a job . I have worked in healthcare for the past 20 years and never has anywhere I worked been fully staffed, there has always been positions available both as a permanent jobs and agency/bank.

However, I think if someone has restrictions on when/where they work/unable to work certain jobs or hours then it has gotten harder to get a job and competition for roles is high

You are absolutely correct, if practical work is your line it's easy to get. We ran an ad for a school caretaker / site manger, 60K and peppercorn rent house, for which we got no applicants first round and 2 second time of running. In the event we offered the unsuccessful candidate a more junior role and employed both.

There is a massive shortage of labour with the skills to work with their hands and conversely more candidates for more cerebral office based work than jobs. That is only going to worsen going forward with AI replacing many office type roles.

Greenartywitch · 25/06/2025 08:00

Is there something specific that makes your search harder?

Because I think there is no doubt that age or a disability/long term health condition (which might have caused gaps in employment) for example makes the search harder as employers, although they are not legally supposed to, do actively avoid employing certain groups of people.

If not then maybe you need to consider a different sector/type of job and also try to apply for temporary jobs or even something that you could start as a small business?

If you are unemployed there are usually many free courses you qualify for which also might be a way to get into something new.

I think the job market is dysfunctional in the UK right now with the sectors that have vacancies paying too little to attract and retain applicants and other sectors trying to squeeze every drop of blood out of existing staff rather than recruit to bring capacity where it needs to be.

Hothothothothothotlovingit · 25/06/2025 07:57

I’ve been in this situation after I left a stressful career. I just started a business. Lots of options out there. I could never work for anyone ever again. I like to take a few months off a year and go traveling. I’ll never earn as much as my friends or past colleagues but I am happy in my life choices now. I like the simple life anyway.

FlightCommanderPRJohnson · 25/06/2025 07:55

EasternStandard · 25/06/2025 07:51

This is concerning.

Isn't it? The graduate was after a trainee role in accountancy, had both industry experience and qualifications - it isn't as though she was being unrealistic or going after some glamorous, high profile type of job.

EasternStandard · 25/06/2025 07:51

FlightCommanderPRJohnson · 25/06/2025 06:58

You're not unemployable, it is just a very, very difficult market at the moment.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/clygj739dmvo

This is concerning.

prelovedusername · 25/06/2025 07:26

You are clearly good enough to get an interview, just getting pipped at the post by someone else.

DD had her CV professionally done because it was a bit rusty, cost £100 and it was money well spent. What they are good at is focusing on your skills in a way that modern employers are looking for. That might be worth considering.

AbzMoz · 25/06/2025 07:17

stuckinthemuddiestwaters · 25/06/2025 07:11

Sorry, I am just a bit down in the dumps and wondering if there is something wrong with me that I can't find work. I rationally know that the economic situation is playing a large part, but emotionally it is difficult to deal with.

are you giving yourself set times of day to apply/follow up etc (and similarly times to switch off from it)?
could you maybe do some work /volunteering for charities which use your skills, get you chatting to people etc, maybe?
when I was made redundant, I found that it difficult to get back into the swing of things and actually some of the work I did with charities (admin, some marketing/ops projects) was as helpful for me as them.

Whaleandsnail6 · 25/06/2025 07:11

I think if someone is able to work at any time and do anything, with their own transport, then getting a job is actually easy.

I live in the Midlands and I could go on indeed now and get work to start next week in a warehouse...in fact I did this last year as temporary work whilst waiting to start another job.

Also, if I wanted to work as a carer, I could pretty much walk into a job . I have worked in healthcare for the past 20 years and never has anywhere I worked been fully staffed, there has always been positions available both as a permanent jobs and agency/bank.

However, I think if someone has restrictions on when/where they work/unable to work certain jobs or hours then it has gotten harder to get a job and competition for roles is high

stuckinthemuddiestwaters · 25/06/2025 07:11

sorrynotathome · 25/06/2025 07:00

How can you be “unemployable” when you have “plenty of experience and promotions”? I thought this was going to be a thread about people who will probably never be able to hold down a job.

Sorry, I am just a bit down in the dumps and wondering if there is something wrong with me that I can't find work. I rationally know that the economic situation is playing a large part, but emotionally it is difficult to deal with.

OP posts:
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