My neighbours have disappeared

I think it’s nice of you to care. I often do welfare checks on my elderly neighbours. You’re just doing the same

Police check- because things can happen.

I disagree, but thanks for commenting.

@Anotherscrubber

Wow your post comes across as really aggressive and filled with projection about your experience which is quite specific and personal to you.

OP @poppetandmog is posting out of concern not nosiness.

There was no need to be so sharp in your last sentence.

Obviously that IS tragic, but to be blunt, it would still be too late by the time people had noticed they were missing. Unless we’re all meant to perform daily checks?

Having had to report to the police for a welfare check when a client failed to turn up to an appointment twice I’d always report. First time they had got back together. Second time, well he ended up in prison. I still remember it decades later.

If there are no debt collector letters on the door or personal belongings anywhere then they've clearly just moved away. Even leaving everything behind is also surprisingly common and rarely a sign of something sinister like mass murder or whatever other comments have been suggesting.

In the vast majority of cases, it's people who made shit financial decisions and simply up and leave to escape their debts. Sometimes it's caused by poor MH, DV or other issues that makes packing up impossible so they just leave everything behind.

Even in our relatively small circle of friends, we know 2 cases of it happening. Our neighbour disappeared overnight leaving everything behind. There was no forwarding address so the mailbox was spilling over as well. She reappeared perfectly fine 3 years later and we saw her by coincidence in a restaurant. Was most likely a debt problem as she would often order masses of things from online shops that were all piling up in our building.

Second case was from a friend who rented an apartment to a Ukrainian refugee family. They stopped paying rent at some point and then just left taking the keys with them. This made it very difficult to evict because you're not allowed to just change the locks if the tenants still have the keys. They still had everything in the apartment and despite being gone and uncontactable. It was eventually sorted out after a long legal battle.

I went away for six weeks a few years ago. It would never have occurred to me to tell the neighbours. Why is it their business?

I would knock on the neighbours first and ask, depending on their response then maybe contact police to do a welfare check. You are concerned and it’s ok to feel that.

What’s the worst that could happen, you get called nosey? I’d rather be called nosey then be one of the many folk you hear about in the news that ‘thought something was wrong’ but did nothing about it.

I think you are doing the right thing.

All new build estates have to have a percentage of housing association properties so the chances are they’ve just moved

Is the house empty? If it's not I would maybe strike up a conversation with a neighbour, ask if they know if they are renting out the property as you have a 'friend' interested. Or just speak to the police and the can do a welfare check.

House opposite us was the same. They did a moonlight flit (literally in the middle of the night apparently) because they owed so much rent. I feel bad because there were children.

cannotbetooarsed

I would probably go and ask a neighbour. I think it’s refreshing to read that someone actually cares about other peoples wellbeing.

Same thought here. If you can’t ask a neighbour, I’d knock with a fake problem, saw a cat wandering about and saw it go into their garden wonder whose it is etc etc. They could all be there and yu just missed them, they were playing inside/ away etc etc but good to have people check

The truth is out there.

I would thnk neighbours either side of these people would know where they have gone, you only back on to them and don't know them well. When I lived in my house (I've downsized to.a flat), I had no idea who the people I backed on to were and doubt they knew anything about me, nor be interested. However I knew my neighbours either side. That's normal.

Genius!

You're clearly not nosey enough @poppetandmog , first things first ask their next door neighbours. It doesn't matter if you don't know them, just knock on the door and ask - they'll never know where you've come from (maybe). If in doubt ask for their Kleeneeze catalogue and tell them the neighbours still owe you the March
edition back.

They might say that they were wondering the same. The plot may thicken.

Can you take a random ball with you and go knock on their door to 'return' it? Then if there's no answer, go to the next door neighbour and ask after them.
Could be a simple explanation, but if you're worried....

When our eldest two DC were 5 and 3 we took them travelling for 10 weeks as we couldn’t envisage another time when we would have that much time off (DH took a month unpaid on top of his generous 7 week summer holidays and I was in a 6 month mandatory gardening leave/notice before I could contractually work for a competitor. I’m sure anyone who didn’t know us well might have wondered where we had vanished to and I would have rather they asked neighbours than worry.

if it’s an elderly neighbour on their own and you haven’t seen them it’s very different - I wouldn’t hesitate for a second and just go straight over to check.

Exactly this 👆. Perhaps if more people paid attention of what was going on around them there’d be more social connection.
Too many folk are walking through life in a fug of oblivion minding their own business.
Perhaps that’s why there’s so much loneliness.

For your peace of mind OP, I’d speak to their immediate neighbour explaining you’ve been worried by their disappearance.

Why don't you ask their next-door neighbors? Or mail a note, which might be forwarded to any current address?

Can I just remind people that those few, tragic cases in the past where entire families have laid deceased in their homes for long periods of time, have all had neighbours later say that they’d noticed them missing but decided to “stay out of it” 😔

This is more worrying than OP’s case. I would Check up on her sooner rather than later.

They probabaly got fed up of the nosy neighbour who keeps peering into their house