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Original poster

To wear this bridesmaid dress when I’m not a bridesmaid?

137 replies

IcyBlonde15 · 24/06/2025 14:49

I was meant to be bridesmaid for a friend 2 years ago, long story short the wedding didn’t happen but I still have the dress I was supposed to wear. I was gutted I wouldn’t get wearing as I loved it. My brother is getting married this summer, and the bride asked me to be bridesmaid but I have chose to just be a guest based on having young children with me etc. I have been wondering about possibly wearing my bridesmaid dress for this occasion. Her wedding party are all in black so there’s no chance I will clash with them or be mistaken for a bridesmaid. Do you think I could wear this dress or is it just to bridesmaidy? Opinions welcome

To wear this bridesmaid dress when I’m not a bridesmaid?
To wear this bridesmaid dress when I’m not a bridesmaid?
OP posts:
angelinawasrobbed · 24/06/2025 17:39

BarnacleBeasley · 24/06/2025 15:00

I think you'd get away with the bow and not look like a bridesmaid if you got it shortened.

This

thatsthatsaidthemayor · 24/06/2025 17:39

Interesting the vote is 50:50 I was on the fence. Could you ask the bride what the bridesmaids are wearing and if they are a similar colour/style?

Uricon2 · 24/06/2025 17:37

I'd talk to the bride making it absolutely clear you will go with whatever she says. Bow off (the new cancel the cheque) and careful accessories and hair, ie quite understated and I think you'd be fine, but talk to her. All in black bridesmaids is quite a statement and your ally here I think.

LittlleMy · 24/06/2025 17:28

@IcyBlonde15 a quick google search reveals modern bridesmaids dresses come in a variety of different styles. It’s a beautiful dress and of a completely different colour family to that of the actual bridesmaids so I’d just wear it and I bet no one notices anything. And if you like it as is, ignore PP saying shorten it or remove bow etc - I mean to have those changes made by a tailor (not cheap) may as well buy a new dress altogether! You’ve already spent good money no need to waste more!

Superhansrantowindsor · 24/06/2025 17:28

Get it shortened. Remove the bow.

diddl · 24/06/2025 17:28

I love it from the front but don't like the cut out back at all.

That said, I think it's ok.

As others have said, take off the bow.

Will anyone else be in full length?

Even if not, not sure I'd shorten it or only by a little.

Not sure it would suit knee length!

CloudywMeatballs · 24/06/2025 17:27

Looks like a perfectly acceptable dress for a wedding guest. I'm not in the UK though, so the norms may be different there.

historyismything82 · 24/06/2025 17:26

Also, as a bride I would be appreciative of you making such a big effort for the special day.

historyismything82 · 24/06/2025 17:25

It's pretty and I think it would be fine. If the others are wearing black you won't look like you're trying to be a part of the bridesmaid brigade. Go for it.

Gloschick · 24/06/2025 17:23

I'm on team ask the bride. One thought though- are there any plans for your dc to be flower girls / page boys? If so, the supervising parent is often a bit more dressed up, so might work in that context.

eqpi4t2hbsnktd · 24/06/2025 17:19

It's not to my taste... I would probably sell it and buy something simpler and less girly.

SaraDara · 24/06/2025 17:18

It’s lovely. I think it looks ok as a wedding guest dress. It’s very pretty.

marmaladeandpeanutbutter · 24/06/2025 17:16

I’d be tempted to remove the bow and cover the empire line belted area with a black one.

MrsMoastyToasty · 24/06/2025 17:15

If you have some type of role in the ceremony, such as singing or doing a reading, then it might be suitable. If you're just one of the crowd I wouldn't risk it.

BeesAndCrumpets · 24/06/2025 17:14

I like.

Keep everything else casual - like, don't have a structured up-do and keep everything a little more bohemian - bag and any accessories. I think it'll work a TREAT! Go for it!

CousinBob · 24/06/2025 17:13

Like others, take the bow off. I think it’s lovely.

zebrastripesarefun · 24/06/2025 17:09

Lovely dress and I like the colour. Bridesmaids are wearing black so suitable for you to wear this dress. Not bridesmaidy at all. Have a great time

NattyFox · 24/06/2025 17:03

I think it would be ok without the bow.

Happyher · 24/06/2025 17:02

I would shortern it to midi length so it’s not so bridesmaidy

Lulu1919 · 24/06/2025 17:00

It's very bridesmaid....maybe without the bow ?
Make it knee length ?

CurlewKate · 24/06/2025 16:59

Could you get it dyed? It’s very bridesmaid-y. And might your friend see pictures on SM?

MakeOrBake · 24/06/2025 16:56

I've seen lots of guests wear similar dresses to weddings. I've noticed massive variety in how formally people dress as wedding guests, but generally the family of the bride and groom go quite formal. I think it's perfect for your brother's wedding.

Wilfrida1 · 24/06/2025 16:54

I would ask the bride, remove the bow and chop off a lot of the hem, especially if you have good legs.

narcASD · 24/06/2025 16:50

I’d get it taken up to knee length then wear it

LittleGuinea · 24/06/2025 16:49

Bridesmaid dresses are just formal dresses that happen to be matchy/themed - nobody will bat an eyelid if you wear this and the actual bridesmaids are wearing something very different. It's a nice dress and quite simple from the front (so will look just a nice simple formal dress in the wedding pictures).

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