Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Unflip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Unflip

1 2 3 4 5 6

Original poster

To wear this bridesmaid dress when I’m not a bridesmaid?

137 replies

IcyBlonde15 · 24/06/2025 14:49

I was meant to be bridesmaid for a friend 2 years ago, long story short the wedding didn’t happen but I still have the dress I was supposed to wear. I was gutted I wouldn’t get wearing as I loved it. My brother is getting married this summer, and the bride asked me to be bridesmaid but I have chose to just be a guest based on having young children with me etc. I have been wondering about possibly wearing my bridesmaid dress for this occasion. Her wedding party are all in black so there’s no chance I will clash with them or be mistaken for a bridesmaid. Do you think I could wear this dress or is it just to bridesmaidy? Opinions welcome

To wear this bridesmaid dress when I’m not a bridesmaid?

OP posts:

MammaBear1 · 25/01/2026 06:09

It’s a lovely colour.
Could you have the bow removed? I don’t think it would look like a bridesmaid dress then. Maybe with a shrug/throw/shawl or something it would be perfect.

W0tnow · 25/01/2026 05:47

I think it’s fine. It’s only bridesmaid-ish if two other women turn up in it.

rowenwren · 25/06/2025 13:30

If you do decide to wear the dress op, you really do need to remove the bow and the train. I think with a bit of length taken off it will be much more wedding guest appropriate and less bridesmaidy.

WineIsMyMainVice · 24/06/2025 23:06

Can you remove the bow from the back? It would look less like a bridesmaid dress then….

ItsAMoooPoint · 24/06/2025 23:02

I specifically looked in the bridesmaid section of shops when looking for something to wear to my siblings' weddings. I wasn't a bridesmaid but surely the sister of the bride / groom needs to look nice?!

I think the dress would be great OP. Sister of the groom is just as important as a bridesmaid and will be in a similar amount of photos on the day.

Oopsadaisysgranny · 24/06/2025 22:55

Maybe just get someone to remove the bow at the back . Then it will just look like a lovely flowing dress ideal for your brother wedding . It’s a lively dress

Wakeywakey678 · 24/06/2025 22:49

dontcomeatme · 24/06/2025 14:56

If you hadn't of told the story behind the dress and just asked if it was appropriate to wear to your brothers formal wedding everyone would have raved about it being perfect.
I would wear it OP, a bridesmaid dress is just a dress 🤷🏻‍♀️ it's beautiful x

This. It's gorgeous. Wear it!

rowenwren · 24/06/2025 22:46

ZoeCM · 24/06/2025 18:01

Is it from Chi Chi London? I think I recognise it. Anyway, it's lovely but unfortunately it's too bridesmaidy. I hope you get another opportunity to wear it.

I think it’s TFNC.

latetothefisting · 24/06/2025 18:56

DappledThings · 24/06/2025 14:54

I don't think it looks particularly bridesmaidy at all. Certainly not from the front, maybe the bow at the back but how much will people be staring at your back if you're not walking down the aisle?

I agree, looks like a nice summer dress similar to what I've seen lots of guests wearing at weddings from the front - back does look a bit more bridesmaidy, could you remove the dangling/trainy bit, or even better the whole bow?

Particularly if you match it with contrasting shoes and bag etc (because bridemaids will tend to be more neutral/matchy) I think it will look fine.

AcrossthePond55 · 24/06/2025 18:51

Maybe if you have the bow removed and shorten it to 'daytime' length. But the open back is still a bit 'bridesmaidy'.

Megifer · 24/06/2025 18:28

I'd wear it, its just a long pink dress, standard wedding attire.

Redpeach · 24/06/2025 18:25

Does it matter if its got bridesmaid vibes, who cares

MassiveOvaryaction · 24/06/2025 18:22

I'd ask her what she thinks before just showing up in it on the day.

Uricon2 · 24/06/2025 18:16

IcyBlonde15 · 24/06/2025 17:46

@MrsMoastyToasty I am actually a witness and have to do a poem x

More reasons full length would be OK, wedding party adjacent. Ask the bride, it sounds like you have a good relationship if you're a witness/doing a reading.

ZenNudist · 24/06/2025 18:13

I think it looks like a good guest dress. You'd only look like a BM if you were in wedding colours.

crazycatladie · 24/06/2025 18:10

Might be ok if you take the bow off.

minnienono · 24/06/2025 18:05

Ask her, if your were my sil I’d be absolutely fine with it.

Morgenrot25 · 24/06/2025 18:03

Sorry OP, it's lovely but it's got definite bridesmaid vibes.

ZoeCM · 24/06/2025 18:01

Is it from Chi Chi London? I think I recognise it. Anyway, it's lovely but unfortunately it's too bridesmaidy. I hope you get another opportunity to wear it.

TinyTempest · 24/06/2025 17:59

Also agree with PP that you should be asking the bride, not us really.

Melonmango70 · 24/06/2025 17:51

Could you have it altered to make it less bridesmaidy but more functional? Change the length and have a panel (or something?) fitted so that it's not open backed, lose the bow?

JIMER202 · 24/06/2025 17:50

Ask the bride!! She did ask you after all to be a bridesmaid originally and perhaps you can do a reading for them? If bride and groom are ok with it. Nobody else’s opinion matters! I’d have been absolutely fine with you wearing it if you were my SIL.

TinyTempest · 24/06/2025 17:47

Why can't you be bridesmaid because you have kids?

It's a family wedding, surely someone can look after them if their dad's not around?

I think it's too bridesmaid-y if you're not a bridesmaid.