Breakdown in friend group - who is right?

You all sound a bit nuts tbh.

In what way does P anticipate W's baby's birthday impacting her own? I'm not aware of many young children's birthdays that comprise much more than popping over with a present and maybe helping blow out some candles, bit of bouncy castle action? And then P can have her birthday celebrations afterwards?

What, apart from Main Character Syndrome, is P's problem?

Unless the hospital gave W a choice of dates and she specifically picked Ps date then she has not choice. There is also no guarantee baby will come on that date. So, did she pick that date on purpose? (I don't know if you get a choice)

My DS was induced and came 4 days later.

But their good or bad traits are completely irrelevant. Surely you can see this?

If W and P were both neo-Nazis who regularly mugged OAPs for drug money, the situation would be unaltered. No one gets induced early on a specific date to piss off someone else.

Chances are we won't actually give birth on the day she's induced anyway. It's a long process, so it's more than likely going to be the next day. So p can relax

So, what do you think op?

So P who has never bothered about other peoples feelings is now hurt and giving out because of this. And P is someone you wouldn’t befriend now? And P is saying they won’t speak to W again because of this perceived injustice.

So the silver lining is you declare yourself team W and rid yourself of P surely. And hope the rest of the group feel the same.

P is being pathetic - you need to tell her this in no uncertain terms

P is a ridiculous person who needs telling so.

I don’t understand why this is even a question. She’s being induced ffs. I wasn’t given a range of dates for my induction.

As an aside, my induction wasn’t started until the evening and DD was born the next day. So the birthdays may not clash. But even if they do, it’s so far from being an issue I can’t believe you’ve had to ask who is being unreasonable!!!

As above.

Also, P is not ‘relaxed’. P is selfish, thoughtless, inconsiderate, judgemental and sees the friendship group as low priority.

If I were you id express this to the 3 non involved friends and if all in agreement make it crystal clear to P that Ws induction is none of her business and if she cuts her out then she risks cutting you all out as you won't stop being friends with W (or possibly I've got my letters mixed up)

I think you and P need to grow the hell up. Induction is no picnic and being induced early suggests there is a problem. Support your friend instead of bitching about birthdays and who is more important.

As an aside, there is a good chance she won’t give birth on that day. My daughter came 3 days after my early induction and it was a difficult and challenging birth. I don’t think I’d ever speak to anyone again who started moaning about the date of my induction.

As is common, first reply nails it.

I love the sound of original P. 🙂

But it sounds like parenthood has changed her immeasurably, and she has become somebody I’d be distancing myself from more and more.

P is definitely the unreasonable one here, spoilt-child-mode I’m afraid.

I hope all goes well for W 🤞 x

P needs to give her head a good wobble! You don't get to choose induction dates and they don't induce early for no reason.

W will already be a bit anxious and P is being the opposite of a friend piling anything further onto her!

P is massively weird.
Convince her that W has little choice if she wants to deliver a live baby.

Remind P that it is so special to have a baby born on one's birthday. Tell her that she is very lucky and to stop being a first rate cow..

I can't understand why people get upset about their friends carrying on with their lives just because it's their birthday. Since when did the world have to stop for an adults birthday? It's all a bit silly.

P is totally being unreasonable. As a mother she should know that a baby would not be being induced early for no reason and should in fact be expressing concern for the friend that this is happening not be issued of because it’s also her birthday

i would be saying exactly that to P

edited to add you dint sound like much of a fiend if you ar also concerned about Ps birthday

Hopefully W makes better friends that both you and P

Love it when the very first post completely captures your thoughts! I was thinking "wow you're really scraping to even try to find something W has done wrong." It's like on reddit aita when they have to try and put the alternative side across to be allowed to post.

Obviously p is completely unreasonable and slightly insane. She would have been equally unreasonable even if W had actively chosen her induction date for non medical reasons (because who prioritises a friends bday over the birth of your child?!), or if their personalities had been reversed so that P was always the one who had made a big deal out of birthdays and W knew that.

Tell P to get a grip. Tbh even if she was in the right she sounds annoying so her losing her friendship wouldn't be a great loss.

Bloody hell. W is being induced early - which as you correctly state is most likely for medical reasons, and you’re worried she’s doing it to piss off P? Because of course that’s her main concern.

There is no way in hell that’s the reason. Also, even if she’s induced on that day, she might not actually give birth for up to 24 hours so baby won’t necessarily have the same birthday as P.

If you’re as much of a friend to W as you say, see what you can do to help. She’s most likely worrying about having to be induced, she doesn’t need the other drama.

P is being utterly ridiculous and it is absolutely bizarre you even need to ask. She sounds bloody exhausting.

And you’re posting this why? Are you contemplating some kind of friendship intervention where you beg W to change her induction date if people on here say ‘Actually, P has a point’?

P is an absolute twit. This is about W's child coming into the world safely, surely the first concern of any kind of friend would be that mother and baby are okay? Early inductions aren't done for laughs.

Prepare for an implosion in your friendship group if P continues to make this all about her. If one of my friends carried on like this, I'd be distancing myself from her.