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Original poster

DH not including me in conversation

34 replies

KPPlumbing · 23/06/2025 21:01

I'd like to hear your perspectives on this, as I've just lost my shit at DH.

He often has random work-related associates round to the house for an after work drink. Great.

He likes me to join them. I'm a sociable person, so I do. He then consistently makes ZERO effort to include me in a single bit of conversation. There's no "How was your day?" or "How was the gym?" or "Oh, it's interesting that you mention that, because KPPlumbing does that for a hobby too". Just...anything.

I can chat to anyone, and can always force my way in to any conversation, which I do.

But I just tore DH a new one about the fact he wants me to join them, and then doesn't make any attempt to bring me into the conversation. I said I won't bother again and will leave him to it.

Do I have a point?

OP posts:
TinyTempest · 23/06/2025 21:10

You sound incredibly angry right now OP.

How many drinks did you have?

What you describe can be fairly annoying but losing your shit and tearing him a new one?

Original poster
KPPlumbing · 23/06/2025 21:09

CaptainFuture · 23/06/2025 21:06

Are you asking questions and interacting, or waiting to be included?

I'm asking questions and shooting the shit. I can do that with anyone.

I'd just like to not have to fight my way in. It would be nice for him to actively include me, as I do when the shoe is on the other foot.

OP posts:
inkyfingers · 23/06/2025 21:08

You do have a point. Leave him to his friends. Sounds boring anyway.

Original poster
KPPlumbing · 23/06/2025 21:08

SixteenClovesOfGarlic · 23/06/2025 21:05

Losing your shit and tearing him a new arsehole sounds a bit dramatic.

You could've just said 'no thanks, it's boring.'

Yes, I wouldn't embarrass him infront of work contacts, but did want to say "Well, youre not making any effort to include me, so I'll leave you to it". I will leave them to it next time.

OP posts:
CaptainFuture · 23/06/2025 21:06

Are you asking questions and interacting, or waiting to be included?

Original poster
KPPlumbing · 23/06/2025 21:06

Sofiewoo · 23/06/2025 21:04

Asking about your day or the gym in a group conversation seems incredibly awkward?
Aren’t you just naturally in the conversation by being part of it?

You think it's awkward for someone to literally walk in having been at the gym, and for their partner to ask "Oh hey, how was the gym?" I don't.

OP posts:
TheSlantedOwl · 23/06/2025 21:05

Yes you have a point, a very good point.

Sounds pretty disrespectful and self absorbed of him.

SixteenClovesOfGarlic · 23/06/2025 21:05

Losing your shit and tearing him a new arsehole sounds a bit dramatic.

You could've just said 'no thanks, it's boring.'

Sofiewoo · 23/06/2025 21:04

Asking about your day or the gym in a group conversation seems incredibly awkward?
Aren’t you just naturally in the conversation by being part of it?