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AIBU?

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Original poster

Wasp nest - aibu?

63 replies

Totallyfedupnow · 23/06/2025 20:55

Just got back from holiday to be told that the next door neighbours have discovered a large wasp nest behind a panel on the side of their house. It’s about 4ft from our garden fence and 15ft from our house. But obviously wasps fly…

Meanwhile I have a young DC who was terrorised by wasps while on a walk in the UK a couple of years ago - they crawled all over his face, over his lips and nose, and kept following him when he tried to move away. As a result he is absolutely terrified of wasps and won’t go outside in the garden if they are around.

I presumed that the neighbours would be getting in pest control to remove the nest, which is what I would obviously do, but they say no, they will be waiting for the nest to die off naturally in the autumn and then they will block the space up, which means the nest will be there all summer.

I explained about my DC’s experience and the impact this might have on him, but all they said was “sorry to hear that, we’re keeping the wasps anyway”.

AIBU to think they are being really selfish?

OP posts:
Tiredofwhataboutery · 24/06/2025 06:46

A similar thing happened to my sister as a child she’d eaten something sweet and remnants were on face and top. It was awful she was really traumatised. I’ve had good success with buzz off jars put in some simple sugar syrup and they get stuck and drown after a bit.

Original poster
Totallyfedupnow · 23/06/2025 22:13

@StarDolphins
I saw with my own eyes how wasps came for DS when he wasn’t doing anything at all. He hadn’t disturbed a nest or tried to smack one or anything. There is nothing I can say to him now that will make him less scared of them.

Also, eating outside is a nightmare if wasps are around. I have had citronella candles for ages just in case but wasps are not deterred if they think something tasty is around.

OP posts:
StarDolphins · 23/06/2025 22:08

I would be the same as your neighbours. My neighbour has one currently and she asked if I minded if she left it until it dies off and I said I don’t mind, yes there’s a few more wasps about but the my generally don’t come for people unless you piss them off!

SleepingisanArt · 23/06/2025 21:59

I stood on a wasp nest burrow in my garden a few years ago. The wasps were furious and I was stung multiple times (I still have scars). I was advised to leave it to die off naturally as wasps never return to an old nest, but if you remove it the wasps can return as it's no longer an old nest. I haven't seen wasps there since although I'm still very cautious (the pain was incredible!)

gamerchick · 23/06/2025 21:50

Wasps are a good thing and they might be alright about it atm but a large nest can make a right nuisance of itself when it starts to die off and they crave sugar. I wouldn't be comfortable with that at all. Especially as the young queens like a warm house to hibernate in over the winter.

I don't know what you can do though. It'll.be 3 months with the windows shut come August here. Get some fake nests to hang near your windows and doors maybe.

Tessiebear2023 · 23/06/2025 21:49

BankHolidayMonday · 23/06/2025 21:44

Contact the council.

It's a health hazard surely? There should be a healthy environmental officer able to come and assess

A normal wasp nest is unlikely to be a heath hazard. It would have to be very big and causing wasps to swarm or get into people's homes.

BankHolidayMonday · 23/06/2025 21:44

Contact the council.

It's a health hazard surely? There should be a healthy environmental officer able to come and assess

Tessiebear2023 · 23/06/2025 21:43

We had a wasp nest in out roof for 3 years and me and the kids never had a single problem with them. Wasps don't seek out humans if you're not disturbing them. However, if my neighbour had asked us to get rid of it we probably would if they had an allergy or phobia, as much as I wouldn't want to kill innocent insects.

I don't think you can make your neighbour do anything about it, unfortunately. You may be upset about this, but you absolutely mustn't let on to your son, it will just panic him and make the situation worse. You could try getting some wasp repellent, or peppermint oil, and put that on him before he plays in the garden. Wasps really don't like it and they'll give him a wide berth.

Original poster
Totallyfedupnow · 23/06/2025 21:39

@Goody2ShoesAndTheFilthyBeast

I will certainly look into that. But wouldn’t stop being stung elsewhere (legs, arms etc) and isn’t super compatible with eating outdoors in summer (eg bbqs).

OP posts:
Goody2ShoesAndTheFilthyBeast · 23/06/2025 21:04

Environmentally they are right. Wasps are essential pollinators.

Can you get your child a hat with mesh? My youngest has a phobia of all flying critters and has a big hat with a mesh thing that comes all the way around and to his shoulders.

TeenLifeMum · 23/06/2025 21:01

They’re insane. Dd3 has been stung 3 times and last time was on her eye and it swelled terribly. She’s now terrified - which I understand, they seem to just fly at her and sting her for no reason. Maybe get some wasp traps and those scented candles etc for the garden to deter them.

Original poster
Totallyfedupnow · 23/06/2025 21:00

Good question but it is not a matter of money - they don’t want anyone removing the nest. They think wasps are a good thing.

OP posts:
Baguettesandcheeseforever · 23/06/2025 20:58

Could you offer to have the nest removed?
It’s not how I would have responded but technically they aren’t doing anything wrong. If the goal is just for your ds to feel safe, I think I’d just take the hit and pay to have it done.

edited typo