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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

It’s just theft isn’t it?

111 replies

HiRen · 23/06/2025 17:34

Am back in the UK for my annual summer break. Just back from the supermarket. Stood behind a pretty old (going to guess at least 80yo) woman who was weighing fennel in the veggies aisle, to get a barcoded sticker that she could self-scan. She did one sticker, then a second, then a third. I moved over to the right a step, intending to lean over to offer help (I’m crap with tech, reasonable assumption she might be too). Immediately clocked she was holding the fennel up a bit, ie semi-lifting it off the scales. Then I watched her select “potatoes” on her fourth attempt. Saw her do it again on her fifth attempt - she’d lifted the fennel higher.

Basically, she was deciding what she wanted to pay for the fennel. She left four stickers behind, all decreasing in price, all for potatoes.

I’m normally all for being empathetic towards people on a budget, especially a fixed budget like an pension, and I know about the col crisis. But this was fennel, in Waitrose. She was LOADED with gold jewelry and had a small LV crossbody bag. She can afford 98p (the fifth sticker price) for a bulb of fennel. It made me half want to tell someone on my way out to double check her shopping scan.

No AIBU I suppose. I’m just properly cross. This isn’t the 80s anymore. Things cost more than they used to. Fennel shouldn’t be expensive - but it is. That’s how it is for everyone, and for more essential stuff than bloody vegetables. They don’t steal. She was blatantly stealing, and it was the repeated effort, and the sneakiness and slyness in the way she did it that made me so cross.

OP posts:
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Bjorkdidit · 24/06/2025 03:51

Of course it's theft. And why many self check outs have cameras and all sorts of other technology and security upgrades to try and prevent it. Although it's likely chain and area dependent.

Since the introduction of self check outs, some supermarkets have found they've apparently sold a lot more potatoes, carrots and onions and a lot fewer cherries, courgettes and yes, fennel.

Zippp · 23/06/2025 22:10

Just read an article about this group in The Times.

https://youcanjustdostuff.com/

I think the world divides into people who will give up their weekend to clear graffiti on trains for free, and folk who think shoplifting fennel is fair game.

You Can Just Do Stuff - Stop Waiting, Start Doing

Join a movement of action-takers who believe in making things happen. No more waiting for permission. You can just do stuff.

https://youcanjustdostuff.com

Midlifecrisis765 · 23/06/2025 21:35

I wonder if the responses would have been the same of the person as male

BatFaceChops · 23/06/2025 21:11

I think it’s quite enterprising tbh 😉

JustGoClickLikeALightSwitch · 23/06/2025 21:05

I had this happen once (in a Sainsbury's, with a man wearing nothing that was especially notable). At the s/service till. He passed something, an avocado possibly, off as an onion. I told him that I saw what he was doing and was going to tell security on my way out. He called me a bitch and then frantically waved the assistant over to say he'd made a mistake etc etc.

Thatsalineallright · 23/06/2025 21:05

FutureCatMum · 23/06/2025 20:40

Calm down, it’s a fennel bulb in Waitrose 😂😂
Peak MN 😂

So I guess you're saying you wouldn't want me to mind my own business with a serious crime then. But where do you draw the line? We should ignore shoplifting according to you, but what if I see someone stealing your wallet? Should I look the other way or not? And if not, why not? If it's ok (according to you) to steal from Waitrose, why isn't it ok to steal from you?

cryinglaughing · 23/06/2025 21:02

I saw a man do this, he had spring onions but selected leeks, I was that 🤏🏻 close to telling him they were spring onions before I realised he was deliberately deceitful.
I don't agree with people doing it but I wouldn't challenge them.

Alltheyellowbirds · 23/06/2025 20:58

HateLongCovid · 23/06/2025 18:28

For all those saying it’s not anyone’s business. Does this go for other crimes as well. Burgling a house -Not my house not my
business. Someone being attacked. I don’t know them not my business. For crime to thrive, it just takes lots of good people to do NOTHING!

Exactly. I’m amazed how many people are ridiculing OP and making sarcastic comments.

If shoplifting is no-one’s business, which other crimes does this go for? Just so we’re all straight. Presumably if you were being mugged in the street you’d want a bystander to do something about it right? But we’re not allowed to care about shoplifting so where is the line between the two?

Comtesse · 23/06/2025 20:52

viques · 23/06/2025 19:47

Let’s hope the free coffee machine was out of order so she missed out on her coffee!

Now that would serve her right!

TBF, fennel is really expensive in the uk. Like inexplicably expensive - it’s half the price in Europe, god knows why. I don’t go round pinching it, but I would buy it more often if it was cheaper…

fairislecable · 23/06/2025 20:51

I agree with you OP and I would have said loudly “ do you want help with that? There is the symbol for fennel “

Hopefully that would shame her and make her think twice before doing it again.

Alltheyellowbirds · 23/06/2025 20:46

FutureCatMum · 23/06/2025 17:36

This has nothing to do with you. Move on with your life.

I genuinely don’t understand this response. Everybody is impacted by theft and the consequential price hikes it causes. Or is it just because it’s Waitrose that you think it doesn’t matter?

Whistlingformysupper · 23/06/2025 20:44

YANBU OP it's proper scummy people that do this and absolutely it's theft!

But don't worry. Supermarkets are rapidly cottoning on - at my local there is now camera above the scales and you have to put your veg on and you don't get to tell the machine what it is - it uses AI to recognise it, and just pings out the sticker. So you can't tell it that Fennel is a cheap potato.

Some people are just trash, and yes, it means the rest of us have to pay more

greencartbluecart · 23/06/2025 20:43

Theft is theft and is wrong

and every time someone steals form a supermarket , the cost is passed into those of us who actually pay

FutureCatMum · 23/06/2025 20:40

Thatsalineallright · 23/06/2025 20:38

So if I ever see you being mugged in the street, or your children being abducted, or your parents being scammed, you want me to mind my own business and move on with my life?

Or, you know, I could actually give a shit because we live in a shared society.

Edited

Calm down, it’s a fennel bulb in Waitrose 😂😂
Peak MN 😂

Sfda · 23/06/2025 20:39

FutureCatMum · 23/06/2025 17:36

This has nothing to do with you. Move on with your life.

Shoplifting and theft isn't okay

Dangermoo · 23/06/2025 20:38

Charlize43 · 23/06/2025 20:38

This is a really good hack. I wonder if she has a Tik Tok channel?

😆 🤣

Thatsalineallright · 23/06/2025 20:38

FutureCatMum · 23/06/2025 17:36

This has nothing to do with you. Move on with your life.

So if I ever see you being mugged in the street, or your children being abducted, or your parents being scammed, you want me to mind my own business and move on with my life?

Or, you know, I could actually give a shit because we live in a shared society.

Charlize43 · 23/06/2025 20:38

This is a really good hack. I wonder if she has a Tik Tok channel?

Dangermoo · 23/06/2025 20:37

Dangermoo · 23/06/2025 20:29

Getting personal, are we?

You don't have to push the love reaction emoji @fruitflavouredmilk . We know why MN disposed of the funny emoji, don't we?

fruitflavouredmilk · 23/06/2025 20:37

Thatsalineallright · 23/06/2025 20:32

It is 100% stealing. I can only assume the posters trying to say it isn't do the same themselves. Depressing.

Try not to feel in it though, OP. All we can do is try to surround ourselves with kind and honest friends/family and do our best to ignore the crazy outside world.

Best post.

Donttellempike · 23/06/2025 20:35

Get a life

HiRen · 23/06/2025 20:33

Having thought further on it, the point about whether supermarkets are profiteering bastards or not is almost irrelevant to me in this instance. The question of age is totally irrelevant to me, I added that as a precursor to offering help. What bothered me was that this woman did not need to save 98p. Yes it could have been a fake bag and fake gold blah blah: if I were asked to describe this woman for police purposes (obvs not for stealing fennel 😅, I’m making a point) I would say they weren’t. Just from the whole way she was put together and her demeanour and where she was and what she was buying etc etc: more likely than not, they weren’t fake. This is a wealthy suburb of London - think Richmond village (but not). People do things like this, when they’re minted, because they’re making a point out of superiority. Fennel shouldn’t cost this much and I’m jolly well not going to pay it - come and get me, I’m right and you’re wrong. It’s the petty superiority that irked, when the news I consume - and so much of what I read on MN, which I use as a resource to inform myself of what life’s really like here when I cast my vote - is nothing but austerity, Col crisis, public sector cuts, NHS on its knees, can’t find a dentist, teachers grossly underpaid, parents struggling to make ends meet because childcare is so expensive. And on and on. It was this woman stealing - fennel, of all things - when actual people actually struggle. That pissed me off.

Anyway, it’s off my chest now. She was out of order and if I had been on the ball I would have liked to point out to her that she needs to rest her produce on the scale for it to register fully, and that actually she was holding fennel, lest she be confused tonight as to why her mash tastes funny.

OP posts:
Hellohelga · 23/06/2025 20:32

Say to her “Can I help you dear? That’s not a potato it’s fennel. It’s easy to get confused with all these buttons and all these veggies. Shall I get a member of staff to help?” Or just “Oi that’s stealing!”

Thatsalineallright · 23/06/2025 20:32

It is 100% stealing. I can only assume the posters trying to say it isn't do the same themselves. Depressing.

Try not to feel in it though, OP. All we can do is try to surround ourselves with kind and honest friends/family and do our best to ignore the crazy outside world.

Dangermoo · 23/06/2025 20:29

fruitflavouredmilk · 23/06/2025 20:25

So has the thumbs up emoji. I’m guessing your age is about the same as the woman stealing.

Getting personal, are we?

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