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AIBU?

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How often does your DIL visit/you visit your in laws?

331 replies

AnotherSadMIL · 23/06/2025 10:00

If you are a MIL how often does your DIL come to visit when your son does? If you are a DIL how often do you visit with your husband?

My DIL quite clearly hates me. I’ve seen her once within the last year with my son and that was only because it was Christmas. I just don’t know if we’re expecting too much thinking she should visit more when son does. No children yet but I suspect in the very near future and I am already upset thinking about how little she will want the children to visit.

OP posts:
AnotherSadMIL · 23/06/2025 10:08

Poopeepoopee · 23/06/2025 10:06

My DIL quite clearly hates me. I’ve seen her once within the last year with my son and that was only because it was Christmas.

So what happens when you invite them over for lunch on a Sunday? What do they actually say to that?

They say they are busy and have plans. They never come over for lunch even though I know they aren’t busy because I will ring and ask what they are doing this weekend and if they’re off work and then when I invite them over for lunch it’s sorry we’re busy.

OP posts:
Toilichte · 23/06/2025 10:08

Why does she “hate” you? Are you just not her kind of people or do you put expectations on how family should behave, demands on your son, or treat siblings differently?

Seems a bit sad that you want this resolved now there’s the whiff of grandchildren in the air rather than a year ago. It’s probably set a bit of a tone now.

Poopeepoopee · 23/06/2025 10:06

My DIL quite clearly hates me. I’ve seen her once within the last year with my son and that was only because it was Christmas.

So what happens when you invite them over for lunch on a Sunday? What do they actually say to that?

AutumnCountdown · 23/06/2025 10:06

Why does she hate you? Does she go out when you visit them?

Gowlett · 23/06/2025 10:05

I visited mine more, before the baby. When we had the baby, they never came to us. DH would bring the baby to see her, occasionally. I didn’t go, it was a little break for me.

I liked my MIL but she tended to bitch about family members, I’d already heard it all before… Everyone had to come to her. I missed seeing her, but not her company if you see what I mean?

BellaBlister · 23/06/2025 10:04

It's very rare that I don't visit when my husband goes, and that will be due to already having plans. I've also visited them without him! Especially when the kids were small.

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