I will start off by saying I really like my stepdad. They have been together ten years. He retired about 7 years ago at 55.
My mum is 62 and still working full time. She is very active, fit and mentally enjoys her job.
In the last year, my stepdad has been grumpier and losing his temper more and more. I think he might have the start of something cognitive.
He gets very snappy at my mum when she is in his way, or tries to help or gives advice. He also gets angry at systems he doesn’t understand like pay at the pump or anything with technology.
Recently he was talking about my mum in quite a negative way and said ‘well she messed it all up when she decided to keep on working, she was supposed to be retiring at 60 but she didn’t want to, so she messed up my retirement, I’m just wasting my life waiting for her now’. There was nothing light hearted or loving in the way he said it.
It makes me wonder how he is when I’m not there and if there is this simmering resentment. Is this really it for her now? Does she just have to stay and watch him get angrier and more short tempered? What if it is dementia?
Do I speak to her about it?