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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Was I unreasonable to say no?

256 replies

Thefourth · 22/06/2025 15:20

Christmas allocation was sent out last week. We have to have it so early because we need to plan the out reach around it. For first time in 5 years I have Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, Boxing Day & NYD off. Im Working nye. We’re going to go away. We dont have children but that’s because I’m infertile it’s not because we don’t want them.

Usually I pick up extra but this year I thought fuck it, no I want to have it all off. So I requested it off and in the comments I pointed out I have covered their Christmas shifts & done my own for 5 years.

I have been massively guilty of tripped by 3 colleagues who have said I must pick up their Christmas shifts because they have children and I don’t. One of them said that I was deceitful by not telling them I wanted it all off because as she assumed I would cover it all she hadn’t asked for any of it off.

Another one has gone to our manager and demanded that he make me work it and give them my days off. He asked me to consider taking some of their shifts and I said if he asks me again I will quit.

For the last 5 years I have had off the 29th-30th December and then take my ‘Christmas leave’ in January.

Their children are 11,5,9,15,18 & 21 respectively if it changes anyone’s opinion.

the atmosphere is awful

OP posts:
Foodfiend2025 · 22/06/2025 15:23

Reiterate you have worked it the last 5 years and have been more than reasonable.

It is not ok for them to be cross with you and make it an uncomfortable working environment. How unappreciative of them to have forgotten the fact you've done it for so long, ungrateful knobs.

annonymousse · 22/06/2025 15:23

I can't believe they are saying these things out loud! The entitlement is off the scale. I worked in NHS and they would look back over the previous 5 years to see who had worked and whose turn it was to be off. There were tears and tantrums every year. So glad to be retired.

Thefourth · 22/06/2025 15:23

Somewhat81 · 22/06/2025 15:20

Fgs you have plans
just say that already booked and paid for
no room for any flexibility
and then move on

I have! They were all sat there bitching about how I ruined Christmas on Friday 🤣

OP posts:
ChaToilLeam · 22/06/2025 15:23

Stick to your guns, OP. For 5 years you've done more than your fair share.

It's up to everyone to put in their requests in time. Management need to step up and state that clearly, and not ask you to change your plans just because they have no spine.

Moonnstars · 22/06/2025 15:22

YANBU. Your manager should be aware that you have worked these shifts for the last few years and it isn't fair for you to have to give them up this time.
Agree to saying you are going away and it's not possible to change dates.

Somewhat81 · 22/06/2025 15:20

Fgs you have plans
just say that already booked and paid for
no room for any flexibility
and then move on