50/50 custody for shift workers

He can’t do 50-50. Is he wanting to do 50-50 to avoid paying maintenance. He needs to change jobs yes, or just do 20% or so, as his job doesn’t allow for this. And yes, is he expecting her to have them all holidays as she is off anyway, as that’s not 50-50.

He’s an arse.

the kids stability is paramount.

My ex has a job which means he travels a lot nothing the UK and abroad and often at short notice. He had every other weekend and that was the best he could manage consistently. There is no way he could offer 50/50. He did try to swap and change his days, week by week but I wouldn't agree to it and he knew it wouldn't stand up in court so had to settle for EOW. It was either that or change his job, which he didn't want to do.

He needs to be reliable so either change his job to do 50/50. Get around the clock Chuck care of sorts for his 50 or just not have 50/50.

He lost his easy life with wifey picking up the slack and working around him when they separated. She’s not his default or fall back without question anymore. He needs to plan his time.

I think this is one of those times when meditation of some sort is going to be needed. Either actual meditation or through the courts. Or they could consider a trial period of 50/50 on set days. So if his schedule means he’s working those days, he needs to arrange childcare, including overnight for the children while they’re with him. Without family support that will be expensive and nearly impossible practically speaking.

I do know a family who manage 50/50 and shift work quite amicably with 4 children. BUT they have two very involved sets of grandparents (one of whom probably have them as much as either of their parents do), one of them has a partner who can help out in an emergency, and their eldest is 17 and can babysit or do the school runs sometimes.

I’d go to court over that. I do 50/50 with my ex and it’s fine because we are both reasonably flexible and work together for the good of the children / communicate. Working random shifts as nd wanting 50/50 is ridiculous. How is she meant to work/ plan childcare. It’s really stressful for children to not know what they are doing.

Absolutely No. Your friend should not accept this. He needs a new job. Or he needs to arrange childcare when he's working.

She shouldn’t accept that because that’s one way he can control her and hold all the cards. He will always be able to change plans and blame it on “work” when he knows she has plans . She will never be able to move on coz he will make sure he will ruin it for her and tell her it’s “work” shifts that have changed and she will be tied to jumping when he says jump .

Nope he needs a new job or not have the kids so much or he sorts childcare for his time having them .