Boyfriend doesn’t want me to wear makeup “hates it”

If you were talking about a friend or relative making comments like this to a person they KNOW has a prior eating disorder - I would say with certainty... spend less time with this person.

If you don't have a chance to eat lunch until 4.00 pm.. - why should you also skip dinner... this advice from him is wrong , wrong, wrong. Why does he have to comment on an d try to control your eating patterns.

Im not even going to start on his comments about your weight but see first sentence.

If you were talking about a friend or a relative making comments about your parenting all the time, when you are playing with your child and telling you to be strickter with them - I would tell you to spend less time with them and tell them that you are the child's mother and it is up to you to decide how strict to be with them.
But its not clear if this is your child or the child of both of you and how old the child is - which makes a difference.. but I don't understand what there is to criticise about a mother playing with their child.

The make up issue - it doesn't sound like you wear too much - its your face , not his

Alll I can see in your posts is that he continually tries to micro manage you, nit pick and tell you that you are doing things wrong.

Go through all the posts you have written and bullet point them... Then read again to see how you feel about the way he treats you.

Absolutely this.

Get rid OP.

This has nothing to do with make up or microwave times. It’s about control. What you describe is text book early stage abuse.

It starts very slowly, you almost wouldn’t notice it. Comments on your appearance or your behaviour. Putting you down, making you feel insecure. If you push back, you’re told that you can’t take criticism or can’t take a joke. You start walking on eggshells to keep him from complaining.

Over time, it’ll get worse. But he’ll switch between making you feel shit and being lovely. Telling you that nobody else would want to date you and then bringing you a cup of tea in bed. Your gut will tell you that something’s off but you’ll rationalise it in your head because he’s lovely sometimes.

In 5 years time, you’ll be so downtrodden and lacking in confidence you won’t have the ability to leave.

@itsprobablyjustaphrasePlease please pay attention to what we’re saying. At the very least, do the Freedom programme so you can see the reality of your relationship.

Or fleeces with wolves on.

This will only get worse.

Don’t waste decades on this twat. Like I did 🙄

Which this woman isn’t

Oh god, missed that bit.
Children are so damaged by men like this.
Hopefully the OP will reach out for support for her child if not herself.

The word boyfriend threw me.
If he is not your childs father? How could you allow such toxicity around your child?

^ This will bells on !

@Burntlemon

Sadly it appears there is a child or children in the home as the Op said

' He already criticises my parenting, saying I’m too loud when we’re playing or that I need to be stricter. '

hopefully he is not the father

You know its cruel clearly.
So why are you staying with someone you know is cruel to you?

You don't have children.
He is deliberately abusive.
Do not inflict him on children.

I'd be criticising him for his every move.

See how he likes it.

My guess would be he wouldn't be able to handle it at all.

If you say back to him. « Yeah, I really hate the way you do your hair and beard. Why do you have it done that way just looks weird. You don’t need to have hair cuts do you? »

No one is perfect but that’s not the issue. Fir every crooked foot there is a crooked shoe. He should think you are perfect for him. And treat you that way.

I only do my makeup 1/2 times a week, during summer holidays I'll probably do it once lol. But I will happily sit and spend 2 hours doing it. It's therapeutic to me, and I really really enjoy it. Tell him you're not doing it for him, or anyone else and if he doesn't like it he can do one.

@itsprobablyjustaphrase this, all day long

He sounds like a negging twat. Why? To make himself feel better?

He doesn’t cook yet he criticises you? What a fucking cheek. I’d be tempted to lamp him with a frying pan - or just never ever cook again. Or the next time he says anything critical, tell him to take over. And mean it.

he sounds horrible. He’s supposed to make your life better, op - does he?

'He already criticises my parenting, saying I’m too loud when we’re playing or that I need to be stricter.'

Please tell us that he is not the father of your child/children ?!

You live together - where ?
in a property one or both of you has bought / mortgaged ?
or in a rental ?

Leave before he destroys you from the inside. He will shatter any confidence you have in yourself.

This is a deeply unhealthy relationship and will cause you so much harm.

OP, please listen to what posters are telling you because if feels like you are not 'hearing' them.
At best, your relationship is unhealthy and that is NOT what you want for your child/rens 'normal'. For this to be the relationship that is modelled as acceptable.
Whilst you may not think you are worth more, you are. And your child/ren most definitely are. You have the strength, it's there, you just need to find it

This is how emotional abuse started in my friends marriage.

next came he didn’t like certain friends. he alienated her from her family. Then her degree was taking up too much of her time. Then she couldn’t read certain books, or watch certain films.

then came the physical abuse.

End this relationship it's only going to get worse. Coercive control us no laughing matter. It's already working on you as you are doubting yourself.

Run for the hills today and start a so much better life!!

Ask him why he needs to criticise you ?

never worn make up in my life - not my thing - but it is yours.

you are an autonomous adult - no one gets to tell you how to dress / what make up to wear.

if you like make up - you wear it.

totally nothing to do with anyone else.

would be concerned that if he ‘wins’ on this (ie stopping you wearing make up) what will it be next?

Sounds all very controlling to me .

And there is no reason you should

He's horrible

HTH