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AIBU?

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Original poster

To have insisted on DH doing his ‘business’ at work when we were down to one bathroom

465 replies

WarmDeer · 21/06/2025 08:36

I told my friends this last night who found it amusing so would be interested to hear if they are the only ones!

We were down to just our upstairs bathroom this week as the downstairs bathroom was being re-done (finally finished yesterday afternoon).

Given the heat, DH was told that he should do his usual morning business when he arrives at his work rather than use the upstairs bathroom, as I didn’t fancy the smell festering all morning in this heat.

DH was fine with this - AIBU to have made such a request?!

OP posts:
HelpMeGetThrough · 21/06/2025 11:05

WhyDoWeAllHaveColours · 21/06/2025 09:26

Striking matches is surprisingly effective at getting rid of fart/poo smells.

And the house!

ilovesooty · 21/06/2025 11:04

Happilyobtuse · 21/06/2025 10:53

I swear your partner is unbelievably patient with your nonsense. I cannot believe anyone else putting up with this! He must really love you or I don’t get why he doesn’t tell you to go fly a kite! 🤦🏽‍♀️😂

He's probably down trodden by her abuse.

ilovesooty · 21/06/2025 11:02

Alltheyellowbirds · 21/06/2025 10:43

Exactly this. And the use of the word “told” is suggestive of a concerning lack of equality in their relationship.

Notice the OP hasn’t been back to take part in the discussion. Suspect the responses aren’t quite what she’d hoped for…

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Can you imagine the responses if a man posted describing his abusive behaviour and said his friends found it amusing? I'm pleased so many people think the OP is out of order and have described this as the abuse it is.

Nopersbro · 21/06/2025 11:01

To have insisted...

DH was told...

AIBU to have made such a request?!

It doesn't sound like it was a request, though.

DH was fine with this.

If it was a request rather than a demand and he genuinely didn't mind, then what's the problem?

rosemarble · 21/06/2025 11:01

Festering all morning?
I suggest you get the plumbing fixed in the toilet.

Samanabanana · 21/06/2025 10:57

He should LTB

Mintsj · 21/06/2025 10:54

tinydynamine · 21/06/2025 10:51

I imagine the OP's poops are blossom fragrant.

No, they clearly smell of shit. But she deals with that shit with prompt flushing etc so that it doesn’t cause the house to stink of shit.

Mintsj · 21/06/2025 10:53

Aniceempirebiscuitandacupoftea · 21/06/2025 10:49

It’s the faff that the poor man has to go through just to use the loo.

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I wouldn’t say the window and a couple of flushes is a faff. I would say it’s basic consideration for other members of the household. The flush is reachable without standing up.

Happilyobtuse · 21/06/2025 10:53

I swear your partner is unbelievably patient with your nonsense. I cannot believe anyone else putting up with this! He must really love you or I don’t get why he doesn’t tell you to go fly a kite! 🤦🏽‍♀️😂

bettyboo9 · 21/06/2025 10:52

I’m sure his work colleagues will thank you for such a request

tinydynamine · 21/06/2025 10:51

I imagine the OP's poops are blossom fragrant.

Bjorkdidit · 21/06/2025 10:50

WarmDeer · 21/06/2025 09:03

We technically have the en-suite too, but that has always been firmly out of bounds for anything but a shower!

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You posted a couple of weeks ago about how your DH wasn't allowed to do 'his business' in the ensuite didn't you?

You. Need. Help. It's a toilet. It's sole purpose is for the hygienic disposal of bodily waste. We are incredibly fortunate in this country to have near universal access to toilets and clean water. A significant proportion of the world doesn't

I prescribe you a week in rural Greece where you're not allowed to flush toilet paper as it will block the drains so you have to put shitty toilet paper in a bin, followed by another week in a developing country where the toilet is a latrine shared with dozens of other people. Then perhaps you will realise how ridiculous you're being.

TimeForABreak4 · 21/06/2025 10:50

Can't imagine telling my husband he's not allowed to use the toilet in his own house and making him go elsewhere. Absolute batshit, excuse the pun.

MrsLeonFarrell · 21/06/2025 10:49

My Granny used the saying "some people think their shit don't stink" quote a lot but I never thought I'd come across someone who literally believed it.

I'm not sure how OP would survive in my house with five adults and one toilet.

Aniceempirebiscuitandacupoftea · 21/06/2025 10:49

Mintsj · 21/06/2025 10:47

Why is it oh good god? The entire house otherwise stinks of shit and there are 4 of us in it.

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It’s the faff that the poor man has to go through just to use the loo.

DancingFerret · 21/06/2025 10:47

Either she chose him because he has no backbone or just got lucky; either way, the OP should be thanking her lucky stars her DH is so tolerant of her demands - because most men would have told her in no uncertain terms where she gets off.

Mintsj · 21/06/2025 10:47

Aniceempirebiscuitandacupoftea · 21/06/2025 10:39

Oh good god!

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Why is it oh good god? The entire house otherwise stinks of shit and there are 4 of us in it.

Idontjetwashthefucker · 21/06/2025 10:46

Id have told you to fuck right off! Just when I thought I'd heard it all...this is totally ridiculous

PiggyPigalle · 21/06/2025 10:45

You discuss your husband's bowel habits with your friends?

ohyesido · 21/06/2025 10:44

I’d say no darling I can do the most basic of human functions n my own home and you will have to learn how to cope with it. It is you who is unreasonable

Alltheyellowbirds · 21/06/2025 10:43

ERthree · 21/06/2025 10:39

Not asked but told. Can you imagine the outrage on here if a woman was told by her Husband when and where she should use the bathroom?

Exactly this. And the use of the word “told” is suggestive of a concerning lack of equality in their relationship.

Notice the OP hasn’t been back to take part in the discussion. Suspect the responses aren’t quite what she’d hoped for…

ruethewhirl · 21/06/2025 10:42

Skodasuperb · 21/06/2025 10:25

This is amazing. You actually think that, in the words of Andre3000 "your shit don't stank".

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I got that song in my head as soon as I started reading this thread 😄

CactusSammy · 21/06/2025 10:40

WarmDeer · 21/06/2025 09:03

We technically have the en-suite too, but that has always been firmly out of bounds for anything but a shower!

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So you do still have 2 useable toilets, you just dont want them used?

Poor sod 😂

ItDoesntHaveToBeASnowman · 21/06/2025 10:40

Sadmummy3 · 21/06/2025 10:38

I'd have told you to piss off. Unless you were also only going to poo at work. Open a window, use air freshener.
My DH absolutely stinks when he shits to the extent his work colleagues use the other toilet if he goes at work (and their toilets are in an outside building) so I wouldn't inflict that on them every day
We only have 1 toilet but luckily we worked out how to open the window and use air freshener.

How does he not find this embarrassing? Do men not care about this stuff?

Aniceempirebiscuitandacupoftea · 21/06/2025 10:39

Mintsj · 21/06/2025 10:31

I think he needs to improve his toilet usage.

Knowing that his shit has nuclear stench, he need to open the window as soon as he goes in and then as soon as the first piece of shit hits the pan, he needs to flush within about 1 second. Any more shit that he does needs flushing as soon as the cistern is ready.

there is no need to make the bathroom smell all morning if you flush quickly and multiple times.

my DH used to often shit and make the entire house smell so I told him to adopt the above procedures!

Oh good god!