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AIBU?

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Original poster

To have insisted on DH doing his ‘business’ at work when we were down to one bathroom

465 replies

WarmDeer · 21/06/2025 08:36

I told my friends this last night who found it amusing so would be interested to hear if they are the only ones!

We were down to just our upstairs bathroom this week as the downstairs bathroom was being re-done (finally finished yesterday afternoon).

Given the heat, DH was told that he should do his usual morning business when he arrives at his work rather than use the upstairs bathroom, as I didn’t fancy the smell festering all morning in this heat.

DH was fine with this - AIBU to have made such a request?!

OP posts:
Hothothothothothotlovingit · 21/06/2025 09:03

WarmDeer · 21/06/2025 08:37

Because I don’t produce such nuclear level stenches, to be frank!

Show quote history

Maybe to your own nose but I can guarantee you your shit smells like shit too!

Pathetic post and I feel pathetic for reading it and bothering to answer.

Aliflowers · 21/06/2025 09:03

WarmDeer · 21/06/2025 08:37

Because I don’t produce such nuclear level stenches, to be frank!

Show quote history

Ah the old adage of my shit don’t stink

Utterly batshit and completely controlling but sure you know that. Also I’d much rather DH shit upstairs rather than use the downstairs bathroom because thats where I’ll be during the day. Is your downstairs bathroom magically many degrees cooler that it smells less that upstairs in the heat?

ThatFlightyTemptressAdventure · 21/06/2025 09:03

Doing his business? Are you married to a cockapoo?

Original poster
WarmDeer · 21/06/2025 09:03

MJQs · 21/06/2025 08:59

🥉 for @WarmDeer for bravery in the line of being "down to one bathroom"

It brings a tear to the eye

We technically have the en-suite too, but that has always been firmly out of bounds for anything but a shower!

OP posts:
SuburbanSprawl · 21/06/2025 09:00

WarmDeer · 21/06/2025 08:36

I told my friends this last night who found it amusing so would be interested to hear if they are the only ones!

We were down to just our upstairs bathroom this week as the downstairs bathroom was being re-done (finally finished yesterday afternoon).

Given the heat, DH was told that he should do his usual morning business when he arrives at his work rather than use the upstairs bathroom, as I didn’t fancy the smell festering all morning in this heat.

DH was fine with this - AIBU to have made such a request?!

If this is indicative of the level of micro-management control you exert in the marriage, I really think he'd be better off without you. His body, his bog, his choice.

MJQs · 21/06/2025 08:59

🥉 for @WarmDeer for bravery in the line of being "down to one bathroom"

It brings a tear to the eye

BuckaDuck · 21/06/2025 08:58

As my nan used to say "do you think your shit don't stink?"

Unless he has an illness the smell should not longer for very long after flushing. If it's as bad as you say he needs to see his GP.

Tiredofwhataboutery · 21/06/2025 08:58

I’d really struggle to delay my morning poo till work. I think YABU, just open a window surely?

BlueMum16 · 21/06/2025 08:58

Close the bathroom door and open the window.

If his morning dump is that bad why should the thousands at work suffer.

DaimondSpine · 21/06/2025 08:57

Just bleach the toilet after a shit and put the lid down. Open a window and spray something.

tumblingdowntherabbithole · 21/06/2025 08:56

What kind of batshittery is this?

Alltheyellowbirds · 21/06/2025 08:56

That’s one of the most controlling things I’ve ever heard. It’s wrong on so many levels.

Firstly for most people office etiquette is usually to try not to do poos at work! How unpopular is he going to become with his colleagues if the first thing he does on arriving every day is take a big dump in the communal loo?

Secondly, how unfair that you are allowed to poo at home and he isn’t - if you really want this rule it has to go for both of you. You're behaving as if it’s YOUR house and he is merely a lodger who must obey your rules. You’ve made him a second class citizen in his own home.

Third, shaming him for having stinkier poos than you is just mean. And may or may not even be true - yours probably pong too but we can’t smell our own in the same way.

Fourth, if he’s regularly desperate to go and having to hold it in that is not only incredibly uncomfortable but may actually be damaging to his health.

YABVU.

Lot’s of homes only ever have one bathroom - do you think the wives in all of those homes ban their DH from doing number twos? Clue, they don’t. They open a window or use air freshener.

As someone said upthread, if a man was doing this to his wife there would be cries of abuse and LTB.

doneandone · 21/06/2025 08:55

Absolutely bonkers!!!!!!
What about you op, did you have to take your morning shit at work too?
Very, very unreasonable!

PollyBell · 21/06/2025 08:55

Why do you, or anyone, have the right to say that to someone

But separate to that I will go where I choose too and I wouldn't expect anyone else to control it like that

IveGotAnUnusuallyLargePelvisISwear · 21/06/2025 08:55

Great. So his work colleagues have to deal with the nuclear fallout of him dropping his guts instead.

gannett · 21/06/2025 08:54

Have you not heard of air freshener? Opening windows?

Telling someone when and where they can shit is bang out of order, shockingly so. I'm worried that your husband actually acquiesced. Do you have a pattern of "telling" him what he can and can't do, and what happens if he says no?

Baconking · 21/06/2025 08:54

Very unreasonable!

Open the window, light a candle, shut the door. 5 minutes and you wouldn't know anyone had been!

Orrr, get the poo spray they you spray in the toilet before going. I take them on holiday as hotel bathrooms rarely have windows.

Candleabra · 21/06/2025 08:54

Bloody hell that is so weird. I can’t believe anyone is this controlling, a toilet has one use, it’s not an ornament in the bathroom .

FrenchandSaunders · 21/06/2025 08:54

Surely you can just leave an upstairs windows open all day?

I wouldn’t make it to work before a pooh or two!

TheWandyDoorholes · 21/06/2025 08:53

Only on Mumsnet do people expect 💩 to smell of roses. 🙄🙄🙄

Witchling · 21/06/2025 08:52

DH was told that he should do his usual morning business when he arrives at his work

If i was "told" to do something, I'd be "telling" that person to fuck off.

HTH

HeddaGarbled · 21/06/2025 08:52

Bit rough on his colleagues.

countrygirl99 · 21/06/2025 08:52

Perhaps the OP should start a Go Fund Me for a mobile loo in the garden for the duration.

Sherararara · 21/06/2025 08:51

I’ll tell you to fuck right off. I’d also consider leaving your weird controlling self.

DaisyChain505 · 21/06/2025 08:50

It’s not convenient being down to one bathroom but that doesn’t mean you get to kick your husband out of his own home to shit at work instead.

It’s only for a set amount of time, suck it up and deal with it.

He lives there, he can’t help how his shit smells. Open some windows and enjoy picking out the tiles for your new bathroom.

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