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AIBU?

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Original poster

To have insisted on DH doing his ‘business’ at work when we were down to one bathroom

465 replies

WarmDeer · 21/06/2025 08:36

I told my friends this last night who found it amusing so would be interested to hear if they are the only ones!

We were down to just our upstairs bathroom this week as the downstairs bathroom was being re-done (finally finished yesterday afternoon).

Given the heat, DH was told that he should do his usual morning business when he arrives at his work rather than use the upstairs bathroom, as I didn’t fancy the smell festering all morning in this heat.

DH was fine with this - AIBU to have made such a request?!

OP posts:
Schoolchoicesucks · 21/06/2025 10:01

He couldn't open a window?

Tweedled · 21/06/2025 09:59

MJQs · 21/06/2025 08:59

🥉 for @WarmDeer for bravery in the line of being "down to one bathroom"

It brings a tear to the eye

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

THEP0PE · 21/06/2025 09:58

We only have one bathroom

lazyarse123 · 21/06/2025 09:58

Does he normally use downstairs loo? Does that nit stink out the ground floor.
I can't believe he agreed to this nonsense.

TealSapphire · 21/06/2025 09:55

Oh and has anyone else been so poor that they sometimes utilise the work bathroom and their toilet paper? I have 😅 Or in the toilet paper shortages in 2020, because you couldn't actually find any in store, sneak a roll from work?

Butchyrestingface · 21/06/2025 09:54

I mean, @WarmDeer is not QUITE as unreasonable as the maternity leave poster who wanted her husband to leave the house of a morning on his way to work by climbing out the living room window to avoid waking her.

But that poster did set the bar pretty high.

Couldyounot · 21/06/2025 09:54

Come on now

Vitrolinsanity · 21/06/2025 09:53

You absolutely have to be kidding.

Alltheyellowbirds · 21/06/2025 09:53

ConcernedOfClapham · 21/06/2025 09:52

This is a reverse, isn’t it?
your DP has banned you from shitting in your own toilet and now you’re seething because you’re - literally - full of shit.

If it is, I hope he shows his wife these comments.

Starlight7080 · 21/06/2025 09:53

Fancy being so shamed in your own home that you have to go to the gym to use the toilet.
This is very controlling behaviour.

If it was a man doing this it would be called abusive

FlamingoFloss · 21/06/2025 09:52

Just wow! YBVVVVU

ConcernedOfClapham · 21/06/2025 09:52

This is a reverse, isn’t it?
your DP has banned you from shitting in your own toilet and now you’re seething because you’re - literally - full of shit.

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 21/06/2025 09:51

I used to ask an ex boyfriend who did awful poos to do them in reception if the hotels on holiday override our room would be filled with a horror stretch that made me want to cry let alone ruin all romance.
He also used to wake me up with a dealthly fart at 3am like clockwork. Yuk. Don't miss him.

Alltheyellowbirds · 21/06/2025 09:51

Parker231 · 21/06/2025 09:48

How come you get to decide how someone using the bathroom in their own home. If you think there is a smell, sort out the ventilation or just open a window.
If I was your DH. I’d be ignoring you!

Show quote history

If I was the DH I’d be telling her to move out and find her own gloriously poo-free place to live.

TealSapphire · 21/06/2025 09:51

With the amount of posters on other threads whose DH's have marathon shitting sessions, an hour plus a day each time, I would think they all should be following OP's lead. Pretty sure they wouldn't be sitting on the loo for 90 minutes in work time!

ThatSchoolOfficeLady · 21/06/2025 09:51

Do you mean to say your shit don't stink🤣

RichardMarxisinnocent · 21/06/2025 09:50

ThriveIn2025 · 21/06/2025 08:42

This. We don’t poo where I work. It’s one shared toilet and there is a very much spoken rule regarding this.

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How on earth does that work? What happens when someone needs a poo during the working day?

Bluebellwood129 · 21/06/2025 09:50

What kind of poorly constructed hell hole do you live in that ensures smells linger for hours?

Cherrysherbet · 21/06/2025 09:50

You sound extremely anal

Azandme · 21/06/2025 09:49

WarmDeer · 21/06/2025 09:11

The work has concluded and it looks like this is the final day of the heatwave, but if needed then he goes to the gym on weekend mornings so we had a contingency plan of him going there.

Show quote history

So other people have to deal with his "nuclear stench" because you don't want to sully your delicate nostrils with it?

Despite having two working toilets in your house? I presume the bathroom and the ensuite have doors to trap it in, and a window to let it out.

I'm amazed you let him use the downstairs one. Then it permeates the downstairs instead. Where the kitchen is. Where the people are. Where any visitors may smell it.

WhenYouSayNothingAtAll · 21/06/2025 09:48

If I was him , I would’ve shat in every available toilet , just out of spite. Twice.

Not that I would’ve married someone so neurotic in the first place.

Too bad he didn’t get a tummy bug this week, that would’ve been fun.

Parker231 · 21/06/2025 09:48

WarmDeer · 21/06/2025 09:03

We technically have the en-suite too, but that has always been firmly out of bounds for anything but a shower!

Show quote history

How come you get to decide how someone using the bathroom in their own home. If you think there is a smell, sort out the ventilation or just open a window.
If I was your DH. I’d be ignoring you!

OhCalmTheFuckDownBarbara · 21/06/2025 09:48

WarmDeer · 21/06/2025 08:37

Because I don’t produce such nuclear level stenches, to be frank!

Show quote history

Another one who thinks their own shit don’t stink. You are aware that we can’t actually smell our own poo the way other people do? Trust me Hyacinth, your shit stinks too.

CurlewKate · 21/06/2025 09:48

Of all the Mumsnet weirdnesses, the “you must not shit in the loo” is one of the weirdest.

RichHolidayPoorHoliday · 21/06/2025 09:47

Not using the en-suite is normal, not using your own loo at home is completely insane. Presumably it's not a loo just off the kitchen is it?

Keep the window opened and buy some spray.

Why is it mildly amusing (at best, or frankly completely bonkers) when it's a woman, but if a man was telling his wife to wait until she's at work, it would be abusive? Because it would be abusive.

Adults clean after themselves, poop or periods, if they don't you are entitled to make a scene. Smell or old pads left neatly in the rubbish bin? The fuck is wrong with you.