To leave my boyfriend over his golfing?

Do you really think it’s your fault? Really?

Isn't the whole point of living together before marriage/children to test out what life with that person is like?
If you're not happy, get out. Don't ever expect another person to change because they won't.

I'm.a golf widow, but I'm OK with it. I.like time to myself. DH plays early on the weekends, so that he's home by lunchtime or earlier. He has a very stressful, sedentary job, so golf is both great exercise and mental relaxation.

I adapt to his golf. We plan our holidays around golf, which is no bad thing. Most golf clubs are near/in lovely resorts with pools etc. Plus I get to indulge mine and DS love of camping (which DH detests) when we head to the Open.

It's my fault in the first place, since I bought him a lesson and he took to it.

He is not relationship material at least with another person. He is relationship material with himself.

@Thepanicyears sounds like you would just be another good widow.
Honestly the amount of posts about golf.
I don’t think I could a man who played because of it .

You are correct about being at home vending and looking after kids as working . While he plays.

Did you miss the part where the OP said he’s doing less and less work around the house? He sounds like a misogynist who thinks he can fill his days with activities he wants to do while the little woman (who also works FT) will take care of him and the house. So yes, a loser.

Don't have children with him op as he won't change. Throw this one back and find someone who makes time for you.

Why is it OP's responsibility to fill the gap of her partner's laziness? If he doesn't want to do his share of the house work, he should be the one getting a cleaner, but he is dumping the mental load of this on her too.

OP is not his god damn assistant. She is his partner, but he is not acting like it.

My DP likes long distance hiking. But he also likes me and our DD, so he goes hiking for a night or two a few times a year. He was half complaining this week that I’ve filled up too many of our weekends with visits to friends and family as he wants time just as a 3. He was right, we’ve been packing too much in! Men like this exist and everyone deserves one! (If it suits them, of course. It suits me!)

You don't need a "valid" reason to leave a relationship. Just not feeling it is reason enough. But him taking you for granted and using you as a second source of income and a house hold appliance would be enough to make me want to leave too.

I live in an area where a LOT of the men play golf. Thankfully my DH doesn’t. So many of the women I know just parent solo most of the weekend as standard. And it’s not just that playing a round takes ages, it’s always drinks afterwards as well. You’re better off out of that!

Thats all you need to kno really.

I can assure you, once kids are on the scene, he will golf more, not less.

You are clearly just his house maid. You tried talking to him, he has not changed a bit. He won't change.

You are so young at 27. Life is ahead of you. Dump his sorry arse and find someone who respects you.

Haha I’m retired and I want my DH to start playing golf again (he stopped when we had DC) just to get him out of the house!

However you are perfectly entitled to end a relationship for whatever reason you like OP, and it doesn’t sound like much of a relationship if you’re a golf widow.

Don't leave because of golf. But do leave because he doesn't put the relationship in a high regard.

Sounds like he doesn't want to spend much time with you. Leave him and get on with your life, you want a serious relationship, he doesnt.

Get out now while you’re still young. Imagine how useless he’ll be if you have kids

Pre-kids is exactly the time to do this stuff … I wish I’d made more of my time before having children. Get a few hobbies yourself

Laughing at the post saying a boyfriend “chatted through their worries with pals” whilst playing golf.
Never met a bloke yet (and I know loads who play as we’re at a time in life where most of us either play ourselves too or are quite happy for our partners to bugger off for hours at a time) who discusses anything of worth during a game beyond their own swing/aim/distance/clubs.

My DH has always been an ardent sports player. Just before we got married, his mum offered to buy him an (expensive) golf membership. I said no way, as we were about to have kids. He agreed that then was not the right time to commit to such a hobby. When he played squash, he would book games for after the kids’ bedtimes. If he wanted to watch football on a Saturday afternoon, he would take the kids out all morning to give me some time to myself in lieu.
Only when they got older and more self-sufficient did the sport-playing ramp up more and I was fine with that. Now we’re retired, we do a lot of it together -golf, pickleball, swimming, cycling and walking.

YANBU, get out now while you can and do NOT ever have children with him.

He won’t change and is treating your house like a B&B. You’re still very young and could meet someone else.

You’ve tried talking to him. He’s not listening. Time to make the brave decision and to move on.

I would leave. Don't spend your weekends lonely and resentful. Find someone who wants to spend their time with you and values your company.
And absolutely do not have children with him!

He wants a busy independent life separate from you. That works for some couples but you’re not happy and he’s not willing to compromise or prioritise you . If you had kids yes you would be left holding the baby.

I would leave and hold out for better.

Lots of good advice here op.

As mellow pink dear says, listen to his actions not his words.

I assume you are also referring to all the female golfers

His golf buddies etc are more important to him than you be grateful you don't have children with him as you'd be left literally holding the baby and doing everything.
Read lots of threads like yours these types of men can't see further than the end of their own nose.