Hell is a terraced house with a hot tub, bar and outdoor tv.

Size had everything to do with it. The one shouting her mouth off was tiny she could eat her for breakfast.

A word of warning, OP: Do not engage in 'revenge noise' no matter how tempting it can be. Or your case could turn into a revenge complaint against you, brought by your neighbour.

God sounds absolutely awful. Seconded on the suggestions of classical music which really does act like Kryptonite to antisocial behaviour.

I’d be so tempted to accidentally take out the TV with an air rifle

Classical music is the way to go. It may actually calm them down! You could be really mean and play Mahler (miserable load of tripe)
I favour learning the trumpet like one previous poster said plus the drums if you so desire.
I'd also take up swearing in your garden there is nothing more embarrassing according to my adult DC.
Failing that ask your partner in a very loud voice if they'd like alfresco sex.

There's an advert atm showing people outdoors having a party watching Glasto on TV....brace yourselves! They will probably be trying to recreate the festival experience in their back garden. Whoop whoop!

I wonder if you can use a catapult to land a dirt bomb in their hot tub. This is against the law but if they were that bad I wouldn't care.

Aw I feel for you op, it only takes 1 bad neighbour to ruin a whole estate and make it miserable. recently had one move in near me, they're not particularly noisy but are very scruffy , front garden looks like the rubbish tip, leave rubbish bags out with the bins on bin day which the bin men won't take. bin bags end up ripped open by wildlife and rubbish ends up all over the street. they've been reported for his but nothing has changed.
They also smoke cannabis all day every day which smells so strong, even while she's holding the baby.
the street has really declined in the last 18 months that she's lived here.

Please report to your local council. I did with my neighbour and the noise is very infrequent now. It took a few attempts, but the neighbours got the message in the end.

Good plan!
(waves cheerily @RedToothBrush)

Do you have a neighbourhood association? Or could you start one?

I agree with you. Those people are unhinged and talking to them would only trigger their aggression. Only yesterday I knocked on neighbours door to asked if they’ve noticed a leaked coming out from their flat and I was met with a lot of swearing and shouting. It’s crazy how some people cant be civil.

doesn't work on everybody, more likey to work on young people https://mosquitoloiteringsolutions.com

It's funny when you see English home improvement shows and they build an outside bar. We don't even have them in New Zealand and our summers are longer and our sections are traditionally larger. I just don't get the point really.

why does anybody end up with an abusive partner?

The first comment nailed it haha.
I have similar neighbours to yours, loud sex, weed, balloons, antisocial behaviour.

You have to join together with the other neighbours and start up lawnmowers, chainsaws, leafblowers etc all at once.

Is there a way you can sneak in the garden and remove the fuse out of the telly plug? Rather than cut the pLug off as then they’d be on to you and escalate.They sound like idiots that would just buy a new tv than check the fuse and I’d delight in costing them money.

This ^

You can also buy infrasound/ultrasound devices which they won't be able to hear, but which will cause them to feel uncomfortable. Dh rigged one up aimed over the fence at loud hot tub man and they'd go inside after 10 minutes. He eventually moved.

It’s never a good idea to complain directly to people like this, if they were reasonable they wouldn’t do it in the first place. We had it from both sides in our last house, weed smoking loud music on one side and constant power tools on the other, there was not one single nice weather day that we could just sit in our garden and enjoy it.

@NaeRolls Can I come with you to that town in Switzerland?! Noise is so intrusive and can be almost impossible to get away from. Some people have no consideration for others.

Learn the bagpipes 😉
Poor you I’d have to move house .
Our neighbours are quiet one side and a bit of noisy outdoor play on one side so it’s fine .
The youngest neighbour child is slowly learning how to speak at an acceptable volume

Sounds like a family I used to love next to and they drove us mad when they were 4 houses away. They talked so loudly that we could hear every outside conversation. Every single interaction sounded argumentative because of the way they spoke. Music would start around 4 and go on to 11/12. Regularly heard the kids who were high school age out at 2/3am.

I wish I had some advice other than report disruptive incidents. We did start using white noise to block them out when sleeping. As the next door neighbor I would say show as little regard for their quiet time as they have shown you.

Hi OP, I don't have any advice, just solidarity. I also can't stand noise, and this sounds like obnoxious noise.

My country, South Africa, is a very noisy place. I love the people here; we are a warm, happy and friendly bunch, despite our problems. But 'inside voices' don't exist. Ordinary conversations are shouted at the top of one's lungs. There is always renovating and construction going on everywhere. In the suburbs, nearly every house has at least one barking dog. Taxi drivers lean on their car hooters in order to attract passengers, the traffic noise is unreal.

I play rain sounds, fans and white noise in ever room to stay sane.

Noise pollution and constant exposure to high noise levels is known to cause physical and psychological stress and even illness. And some of us are especially sensitive to noise and it affects us even more.

Apparently there is a town in Switzerland where noise is seen in this way, as an environmental hazard, so it is strictly regulated, and it's the quietest town in the world. I often dream of moving there.

I share your pain OP. We live in a lovely rural area on a small lane. The closest houses are us and our opposite neighbours, so our gardens are divided by a single track road. Used to be lived in by the Vicar and his wife, so you can imagine how quiet it was. Then the new owners moved in 5 years ago. During lockdown, they built a bar. In the front garden. Complete with lighting, heating, and sound system. Only they don't need the sound system as he's ex army and his voice booms for miles.... I can't tell you how depressed I now am living near them. Every weekend is a horror fest of drinking, noise and 80s music until the early hours. They're in their early 60s as well - but it's like an Inbetweener party. We put the house on the market (our home of 30 + years) but everyone that came to view saw the bar and that was that. I've reported to the council repeatedly, but even though it's in breach of planning, the owner was simply invited to apply for restrospective planning. I'm keeping a noise log, videos and sound recordings but know full well that reporting them will only go against us if we're brave enough to try selling again.

Just rmemeber if you file noise complaints it’ll come up when(if) you go to sell your house. It’s the only thing that stopped us as ours has just sold