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Original poster

‘Don’t splash me!’

181 replies

Justputsomecocoabutteronit · 20/06/2025 15:56

Having a short, four day holiday with Dp & Dd.
We went to the beach this morning, Dd very excited & happy. She ran into the sea, Dp came in with swim shorts on and stood there to get used to the sea. Dd playfully kick splashed him with water, he sharply shouted ‘Don’t do that! Don’t splash me with water!’ Dd looked a bit shocked and said ‘Sorry’ quietly
Sat at the coffee part and Dp starts talking to me about insurance payments he has to sort for his bike, whilst i’m chatting happily with dd and looking at the blue sea.
We drive to the restaurant for lunch, Dd needs a poo so he’s going slightly fast, a man crosses the road, I say ‘Careful! The man crossing the road’ more because I’m anxious of these things, he gets so angry and saying awful things to me and how I don’t need to tell him how to drive etc.

Is all this normal? Feel so low

OP posts:
Laiste · 20/06/2025 18:29

I've got 4 kids. Each one of them learned very early on that Mum does NOT like being splashed and will get in (the freezing cold fecking sea) in her own time and then will be just as fun as everyone else.

None of them are damaged adults. In fact it's a running joke which i'm happy to join in laughing at. (But god help you if you splash me while we're laughing).

The convo about getting insurance ... can't see what's so bad about that. Things pop into your mind even on holiday. I'd hate to feel i couldn't speak about something because people were gazing at the ocean ?

Saying horrible things: haven't really heard what horrible things they were. But if you have a tendency to be an anxious passenger i'd be likely to snap at you too.

Drangea · 20/06/2025 18:28

MorrisZapp · 20/06/2025 18:13

He shouted it sharply, the kid fell silent. Is that your vibe with your kids on holiday?

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😂 yes of course it is! If my kids are being annoying or dicks they may well be spoken to sharply and (hopefully) they will shut up. Applies to real life and holiday.
We don’t live on Instagram. We are a real family.
You seem to have set yourself an incredibly
high bar for how to interact with your kids.
I don’t find holidays an endurance test and never have, even with littles. Always enjoyed it and always have all had fun together, because we don’t silently grit our teeth and put up with behaviour with can’t stand because we are on holiday so you mustn’t have any boundaries in case it upsets the kids. If they’re annoying they get reined in. If DH wants to discuss some life admin whilst we have a drink at a bar, we do, and the kids listen and maybe learn a bit or they play cards or they just zone out. Four people in the family, all working together as a team. No kids on pedestals.

Original poster
Justputsomecocoabutteronit · 20/06/2025 18:28

Ddakji · 20/06/2025 18:26

Jesus Christ, this thread is insane. Some people either shouldn’t have kids or should just stay at home in their po-faced splendour and let them have fun with other people.

Your kid splashes you? You yell “WOAH!!” in shock and then splash them back 10 times harder.

We’re off to the beach tomorrow and I’m going to making sure there’s plenty of splashing and more to spare. And I’ll be able to spot all the cats bum MNers at a thousand yards, I’m sure. If they actually go to the beach, which with any luck they won’t.

This made me smile, thank you 💓

OP posts:
Original poster
Justputsomecocoabutteronit · 20/06/2025 18:26

PopeJoan2 · 20/06/2025 18:23

He Was driving too fast and she was anxious

Op, it sounds as though there is more to this than you are saying. Is your partner always like this?

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Quite a lot, stressed easily and unable to control emotions

OP posts:
Ddakji · 20/06/2025 18:26

Jesus Christ, this thread is insane. Some people either shouldn’t have kids or should just stay at home in their po-faced splendour and let them have fun with other people.

Your kid splashes you? You yell “WOAH!!” in shock and then splash them back 10 times harder.

We’re off to the beach tomorrow and I’m going to making sure there’s plenty of splashing and more to spare. And I’ll be able to spot all the cats bum MNers at a thousand yards, I’m sure. If they actually go to the beach, which with any luck they won’t.

MorrisZapp · 20/06/2025 18:24

Blondebrownorred · 20/06/2025 18:22

All the children in our family know not to splash other people until invited. Its rude and not very nice.

The op isn't asking if people like being splashed. She's asking if they'd shout sharply at their kids for doing it.

PopeJoan2 · 20/06/2025 18:23

CowboyJoanna · 20/06/2025 16:03

Sounds like DH is stressed about the insurance and the heat's not helping either.

Yes he does sound like he's been grumpy, especially with him telling DD not to splash (which is very unreasonable when you're at the seaside with kids), but I wouldn't make any judgements because what's he normally like?

We drive to the restaurant for lunch, Dd needs a poo so he’s going slightly fast, a man crosses the road, I say ‘Careful! The man crossing the road’ more because I’m anxious of these things, he gets so angry and saying awful things to me and how I don’t need to tell him how to drive etc.

In all fairness to DH I'd also get a bit arsey if someone started backseat driving with me

He Was driving too fast and she was anxious

Op, it sounds as though there is more to this than you are saying. Is your partner always like this?

Blondebrownorred · 20/06/2025 18:22

All the children in our family know not to splash other people until invited. Its rude and not very nice.

HelenCurlyBrown · 20/06/2025 18:21

‘Don’t splash me!’?

He sounds like a bit of a baby.

Also, if he’s getting ‘really angry’ and ‘saying awful things’ to you, do you want that to be how your daughter is raised?

MorrisZapp · 20/06/2025 18:20

TheignT · 20/06/2025 18:13

Maybe he doesn't find being splashed with cold water fun.

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Holidays with small kids are an endurance test. Sand, sea, heat, travel, food etc all bloody annoying. But adults can control their emotions for the greater good. I 'don't like' having to go back indoors at 8pm on holiday but that's what life with little kids is. I could shout, sulk and ruin it for everyone but I'm not a dick. This man is making his family pay for his own emotional immaturity.

WimbyAce · 20/06/2025 18:16

Garlik · 20/06/2025 18:12

Sounds pretty typical behaviour from stressed out people on holiday. My dh and I both have stressful lives and this would be like our first 3 days on holiday before we fully relax into it. I wouldn’t like being splashed by cold water either and would snap at dc for this if I was stressed. Neither myself nor dh like a backseat driver.

Agree with this. I can't see anything that bad from his behaviour tbh.

InterestedDad37 · 20/06/2025 18:15

swimsong · 20/06/2025 18:09

Oh the irony 🙄

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🤔🤔🤔
What I meant was that you wouldn't have caught me snapping at my kids like that, so I am challenging the assertion that it's part and parcel of 'being a man'.
Just like 'nagging' is not part and parcel of being a woman. 😀

ForZanyAquaViewer · 20/06/2025 18:15

Justputsomecocoabutteronit · 20/06/2025 17:09

It all just wraps together to make a miserable, angry vibe
I try to enjoy things and have fun with Dd. I have lots of things on my mind, but I can fret about them on my own. I don’t want to hear stressy things about bills and having to pay insurance, I do these things constantly, i’d prefer not to moan about them at a beach bar in front of Dd especially

Did you say this to him?

TheignT · 20/06/2025 18:13

Justputsomecocoabutteronit · 20/06/2025 17:46

Are you for real?! A 6 year old runs excitedly into the sea with her daddy, she splashes around laughing and turns and splashes her daddy to initiate play…She therefore needs to be taught about boundaries and should ask his consent first???
No, maybe he needs to stop being such a mard, relax a bit and try to have a bit of fun

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Maybe he doesn't find being splashed with cold water fun.

MorrisZapp · 20/06/2025 18:13

Drangea · 20/06/2025 18:11

I’d probably say something along the lines of “don’t do that, don’t splash me”….. as the OP reports her husband did.

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He shouted it sharply, the kid fell silent. Is that your vibe with your kids on holiday?

Garlik · 20/06/2025 18:12

Sounds pretty typical behaviour from stressed out people on holiday. My dh and I both have stressful lives and this would be like our first 3 days on holiday before we fully relax into it. I wouldn’t like being splashed by cold water either and would snap at dc for this if I was stressed. Neither myself nor dh like a backseat driver.

Original poster
Justputsomecocoabutteronit · 20/06/2025 18:11

MorrisZapp · 20/06/2025 18:10

How would you express this, on holiday?

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This is the key thing, isn’t it

OP posts:
Drangea · 20/06/2025 18:11

MorrisZapp · 20/06/2025 18:10

How would you express this, on holiday?

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I’d probably say something along the lines of “don’t do that, don’t splash me”….. as the OP reports her husband did.

50lbstolose · 20/06/2025 18:11

This sounds like every holiday my exh and I had. The final straw was when he was miserable at Disneyland.
We separated when we returned. Now my kids and I have fun filled relaxing holidays 😁

IPM · 20/06/2025 18:10

Justputsomecocoabutteronit · 20/06/2025 18:06

It really isn’t that simple.

We live abroad, i’m stuck here, there’s a lot to navigate. It’s not always that easy, sadly. Plus, even if we did separate, he’d still have time with her so that could still happen 😔

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It sounds as though you'd both be happier though, which in turn would probably make for a happier child.

MorrisZapp · 20/06/2025 18:10

rowenwren · 20/06/2025 18:07

I don’t want to be splashed by my children or told how to drive by my passenger either.

How would you express this, on holiday?

TheignT · 20/06/2025 18:10

Justputsomecocoabutteronit · 20/06/2025 16:13

When he saw me looking shocked at him speaking like that when she was just having fun, he said ‘You just shocked me, it gave me a shock’ (the cold water)

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Well it probably did.

SixteenClovesOfGarlic · 20/06/2025 18:09

Are you stuck living abroad with him and not married?

MorrisZapp · 20/06/2025 18:09

Allthatwegotisthispalebluedot · 20/06/2025 18:04

Some of the responses here are madness. The man doesn’t need to be splashed in sea water if he doesnt really want to be, and he told the kid to stop. That does not seem entirely unreasonable. Evidently lots of people find it unpleasant - and it’s really not such a bad thing for kids to learn that not everything they do is delightful and needs to be indulged all the time.

You having a tantrum because he dared to talk about life admin while you were looking at the sea is totally unreasonable.

Sorry for the broken record, but what tone would you take with your own six year old child splashing you on holiday? Or indeed doing anything else annoying but ultimately harmless?

swimsong · 20/06/2025 18:09

InterestedDad37 · 20/06/2025 16:25

🤣🤣🤣
Sorry, but that's such a ridiculous thing to say 🤣🤣🤣

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Oh the irony 🙄