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Original poster

Friend dating ex

66 replies

MrsRaspberry · 20/06/2025 09:10

As the title suggests a close friend of mine is dating my ex which I will start by saying totally isn't a problem as I was the one who ended the relationship after him accusing me of aborting his baby when I'd had a miscarriage. Friend knew this too. She messaged on a group chat on WhatsApp two weeks ago saying she was seeing some guy and sent a pic of him and told us the guys name(this wasn't my ex) then days later on the same group chat she says "guys name"says hi I'm like oh who's he and she put a pic up. I was like oh that's my ex Lol she said yeah I know he told me. So they've been seeing one another all of a week. She's saying they're discussing marriage etc like I'm happy for her but it just seems like she WANTS me to be jealous and find it awkward when I don't I have no interest in the guy. Our friend asked who was going to a stripper night and she pipes up with "well I have my own stripper now-oh sorry MrsRaspberry must be awkward for you" like no it isn't at all..she's even said it in the group chat like I know it must be awkward for you but we just click naturally. Like is it just me or is she wanting to try to make things awkward for some attention?

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SpryCat · 23/06/2025 10:03

She is not your friend, she wouldn’t piss on you if you were on fire! I’d leave that group chat and make another one.

Yogabearmous · 23/06/2025 08:57

I’d reply to every comment “nah you’re ok, you keep him, lol!”

GCAcademic · 23/06/2025 08:43

Why are you persisting with this friendship, going to cafes with her and whatnot? You dumped your shitty ex. Do the same with shitty friends.

PollyBell · 23/06/2025 08:29

I am not saying don't post but you1 keep on saying it doesn't bother you but you are putting a lot of effort into trying to convince us you dont care

What do you get oit of the friendship attention of not then what?

Original poster
MrsRaspberry · 23/06/2025 08:14

x2boys · 23/06/2025 07:33

Don't get drawn into this it's pointless and childish
If they carry on than personally i would just leave the group and block them both.

Show quote history

Yeah I told them both I've said what I needed to say and that there's no need for the childish behaviour. I really can't be arsed with her. She's been rude lately too. We popped into a cafe for coffee and chat and without warning mid sentence in conversation she looks at me picks up her phone and called him I know it was him as she was saying "hi babe just seeing if you're ok are you on break still oh I'm with MrsRaspberry as we went to her daughter's sports day" then to me oh Stuart says hi. How rude. She could've at least said like hang on I'm just making a call. It's pathetic

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x2boys · 23/06/2025 07:33

MrsRaspberry · 22/06/2025 23:08

Oh they replied. She's all like oh what have I supposedly said acting all innocent and him he responded saying he doesn't have a problem with me. I told them maybe not but I won't be made to look like a bitter bitch and publicly so considering her comments have been over a friend's group chat when I have no care that they're dating.

Don't get drawn into this it's pointless and childish
If they carry on than personally i would just leave the group and block them both.

Original poster
MrsRaspberry · 22/06/2025 23:08

Oh they replied. She's all like oh what have I supposedly said acting all innocent and him he responded saying he doesn't have a problem with me. I told them maybe not but I won't be made to look like a bitter bitch and publicly so considering her comments have been over a friend's group chat when I have no care that they're dating.

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Cosycover · 22/06/2025 21:28

Well it will definitely be awkward now 😂 good on you for calling them out! I can't even imagine what they can reply to that tbh!

unbelieveable22 · 22/06/2025 20:45

You've called them out. Reading what you posted makes them look even more pathetic. Don't get into a tit for tat. Draw a line under it now and move on.

Original poster
MrsRaspberry · 22/06/2025 19:35

UPDATE......
I posted this in the group chat to get it off my chest:
@⁨Debs⁩ @⁨Stu⁩. Not being nasty and I'm genuinely happy for you both I really am. Honestly. But I don't understand why I'm getting the feeling that it seems that yous want me to have a problem with you two being together and that I should find it awkward. I've bitten my tongue honestly guys I have. That ship sailed over 10 years ago now and I have no problem with an ex of mine moving on. Please don't post stuff on here to seem to publicly try to embarrass me or something in front of everyone else on here. If either of you feel that I'm the one who should feel awkward then maybe it's yous who are feeling awkward or something. I'm not a jealous or petty person and I'm fed up of feeling like any mention of Stuart is made especially when it's repeatedly said oh oops sorry must be awkward for you. It's honestly getting silly and I'm not having friends in here thinking I'm jealous when I'm not. Why would I want to stay with a man who instead of supporting me through a miscarriage decided to be nasty about it and accused me of purposely aborting his baby when I didn't. I don't want drama in this group chat but I will not be made to feel like somebody seems to want me to have a problem when I don't

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Original poster
MrsRaspberry · 22/06/2025 00:43

outerspacepotato · 21/06/2025 23:31

Why would you think she's a friend?

She's trying to get a rise out of you about dating your ex.

She's competing with you and happy to see you, er, "lose the prize". 😂

Block them both.

She is supposed to be a friend she was my friend for a number of years. Almost everyone in our friend group knows what she's like where men are concerned. She can't seem to be without a relationship. Even my friend said we all know what she's like and there will probably be another new guy in a few weeks time. Why she seems to want to try to embarrass me particularly now is beyond me. Like if she genuinely wants to be with this guy she can crack on and be with him but there's no need for her to keep making a point of it being known that he is my ex therefore it must be weird and awkward for me to see that they're together. Honestly she needs to cut it out. She wonders why other people fall out with her and blames everyone else when her friendships end. Clearly she's finally showing her true colours. She's being spiteful and looking for attention at my expense now and it's not on. I don't know for sure but one of our other friends may have had a quiet word with her after we had a conversation that she appears to seem to want me to purposely make out that i will have an issue with them dating. For someone I've considered a friend for so many years I really wouldn't have expected her to stoop to this level of pettiness when I've done nothing but try to support her when others have openly bullied her when they fall out with her. I can only assume now that she's the one that has been spiteful to others that have fallen out with her over the last few years

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outerspacepotato · 21/06/2025 23:31

Why would you think she's a friend?

She's trying to get a rise out of you about dating your ex.

She's competing with you and happy to see you, er, "lose the prize". 😂

Block them both.

Original poster
MrsRaspberry · 21/06/2025 23:17

It really is childish of her she is older than me and I'm 42. She's 45/46. its really petty of her considering I couldn't give two shits if they're together. They're both sad and desperate. She's nothing special. He's only recently come out of a relationship and a month before they met he was messaging me hinting that he was single and available again asking me to meet him and I declined. So he's gone searching for any woman that will take him because he knows that I'm not interested and I'm also unavailable. He's probably looking for anyone who he thinks is stupid enough to take him and let him move in with them so he doesn't have to live with his mother and he can find somewhere else to live for free (when I was with him he was asking me to allow him to move in with me so he could save on having to pay bills in his own home)

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Theunamedcat · 20/06/2025 21:02

If she brings it up again just mention that they seem very well suited ideal couple why on earth would you be bothered

anxioussmess · 20/06/2025 20:48

With friends like that who needs enemies. She deffo has issues for sure

randomusernam · 20/06/2025 20:25

I really wouldn’t address it, if she says ‘oh sorry must be awkward’ just responded with I really don’t mind you chatting about your partner. Pretend like you believe they’re going the distance. She is clearly a very sad lonely girl who is begging for male attention to validate her self worth. You have moved on, have a real relationship that is three years strong and this one will probably be another flash in the pan. From what you have said you won’t have to wait long for it all to crumble. Just sit back and enjoy the ride. I promise you everyone else jn that group chat is thinking the same as you.

saltandvinegarchipsticks · 20/06/2025 16:00

Jc2001 · 20/06/2025 10:01

Wow that's harsh. You hope her ex partner abuses her friend?

What did you have in mind? Physical abuse? Emotional?

Seems a very strange thing to hope for.

Edited
Show quote history

Right? Where’d she even get the abusive thing from anyway?

rowenwren · 20/06/2025 15:56

She’s crackers. I’d not be calling her a friend in future.

Rainbowgal12 · 20/06/2025 15:45

MrsRaspberry · 20/06/2025 15:29

I've told my other mate if she makes one more remark like that in the group I'll be outing her and making her suitably embarrassed

Just handle it like an adult, message her and say you couldn’t care if she dated him and you have no feelings for him. You’re just sad that she knew what he put you through during your miscarriage and the comment about him being her stripper was highly immature. I’d make it clear the friendship is over. No need to say all this over the group chat

Rainbowgal12 · 20/06/2025 15:44

Dating a close friends ex is an absolute no go. To add insult she knew he accused you of aborting your baby when you went through a miscarriage. That’s no friend. Even if you don’t care if she dated him, she must have no respect or care for you knowing what he put you through at the most vulnerable time of your life.

Her text about having her own stripper, oh sorry mrsraspberry is immature, pathetic

If anything I think you’d be unreasonable to continue your friendship with her

Original poster
MrsRaspberry · 20/06/2025 15:29

I've told my other mate if she makes one more remark like that in the group I'll be outing her and making her suitably embarrassed

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OhCalmTheFuckDownBarbara · 20/06/2025 14:06

Personally I'd re evaluate who you term a friend. This certainly isn't your friend. She's purposely trying to wind you up like she thinks she's got one over on you. You really need friends like that?

AmayaBuzzbee · 20/06/2025 13:52

Start another group chat for all the same friends except her, and communicate there from now on 🙂

grumpygrape · 20/06/2025 13:52

Maybe after the next one, bounce it back to her.

'Friend, I'm sorry you feel so awkward about dating and posting about 'ex', I don't.

Original poster
MrsRaspberry · 20/06/2025 13:32

HelloCheekyCat · 20/06/2025 13:16

It's difficult to get the balance in anything you say because you could come across defensive. I dont actually know what to suggest 😆
Adding him to the group.chat is beyond weird! Are any other boyfriends in it?.not that he is even a boyfriend yet of.course. Can as admin kick.him out?!

That's what I mean cos whatever I say she's gonna think she's actually making me bothered about it when I'm not. She's honestly welcome to him. Her track record with relationships in the last two years alone is questionable to be honest. Even my other friend has said there's no need to keep bringing him up,that she probably shouldn't have added him to the group chat and that it'll most likely be that there will be another new man on her scene in a few weeks time.No one else's partners are in there so it is weird

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